Chapter 1
I never really understood the feeling someone has when falling in love.
When I ask people, it’s hard for them to describe. But it’s a whimsical sensation that takes over them without realizing it. I’ve always been interested in caring for someone like that in a star-struck romance.
It’s the feeling that is enticing to almost everyone. It’s a highly popular subject for people of all ages, whether they’re high school students experiencing it for the first time or adults going out with the mindset of marriage. I’m no exception to being fascinated with romance, as I’d also like to read cute, wholesome romance light novels during my free time.
But in the twenty years of my life, I don’t think that I’ve ever felt that feeling once. A part of me wondered if something was wrong with me for being unable to feel this way.
Growing up, I never had a crush on a girl. When someone asked me who my crush was, I would randomly say a classmate’s name to appease them. The others would react like kids usually would and tease me, but things never progressed beyond that. I didn’t think about it much because I was a kid and too young to understand complicated feelings like love.
I figured it would all change when I matured and entered high school, but that would never happen.
People rely on others to make connections, which I believe is a foundational staple in everyday life. Romance can be considered the highest level of commitment two people can have. It is a bond that forms into something so firm that it can almost become unbreakable. Still, I felt nothing.
A part of me feared that I could not connect emotionally with people, that something was wrong with me for not being like the others, that I had some problem that couldn’t be fixed no matter how much I tried and forced myself to feel this way. The seamless way people discussed the subject only made me hate myself for being unable to think like this.
It took me a while to realize that I don’t have to experience something to understand and think fondly about it. When I finally realized this, I started to enjoy the subject more than I had before.
It also opened me up to what my friends talk about without worrying about what I think or feel.
“I think we should head there next month!”
“These images look so pretty.”
“I know, right? And I hear that they look even better in person!”
“Going there with you seems like it’ll be fun, Kyoka-chan.”
Two of my friends chatted beside me while I thoughtlessly ate my messy bento. Both were interested in visiting this botanical garden, which features artistic lighting that adds an alluring touch to nature.
I see one of them giving me a thankful smile with a small fist pump. I couldn’t help but amusingly nod to her. It seems like my advice to her was a good one.
The purple-haired girl thanking me was Sayama Kyoka, one of my friends since high school.
“Still. It’s rare for Kyoka-chan to be interested in this type of place.”
“Eh? I just thought it looked nice. Plus, I figured that Serena would like this sort of thing.”
Kyoka looked somewhat embarrassed by that comment as she played.
“I do like it! I want to go with you, Kyoka-chan.”
“I’m glad! I’ll book the tickets then. Ah... I’ll be right back!”
Kyoka excuses herself and quickly runs off, leaving Serena and me alone. Looking over, I see my childhood best friend, brimming brightly with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen from her as she anxiously adjusts her glasses.
“Why watch romantic dramas when I have the best romcom before me?”
“Y-Yuto!”
Serena almost jumps from hearing my voice. She quickly turns to me, fumbling her arms frantically while getting as red as a tomato. I held myself back from laughing at how funny it was whenever Serena was with Kyoka.
“Why are you shocked? Did you forget I was here being the third wheel to you two?”
“I’m sorry, Yuto. I didn’t mean to do that.”
“Eh, it’s fine. I didn’t mind at all watching you two lovebirds.”
“Still! That’s embarrassing!”
“I’ve known you since we were babies! You’re fine.”
Serena lets out a flustered huff while using her hands to cover her face. It was amusing that she still acts like a young maiden in love after all this time.
“Speaking of which, you guys aren’t going there until next month, right?”
“Yeah. It’s a bit awkward, considering it’s so close to the midterms. Those times are always rough on us and
“I know that Kyoka and I have reports due a week before. But I don’t think we have any exams, so I think there’s nothing you have to worry about from her side.”
“That’s good. I pray that nothing happens on my end, either. I don’t want to miss that weekend because of my classes.”
“I wouldn’t worry too much about it. You two will be fine.”
I pat Serena on the shoulder with a confident smile. Looking at me, she slowly nods, matching my confidence as she psychs herself up.
“Yeah! Thank you, Yuto! You’re always helping me when I need it.”
“Eh? What are you two so excited about?”
Serena and I look back to see Kyoka walking back with a curious glance. I shrug nonchalantly.
“Talking a bit about schoolwork... Speaking of assignments, did you finish the quiz that is due today?”
...
“AH!!! I FORGOT!”
Kyoka looks distressed and holds her head. She quickly paces back and forth, frantic that she forgot.
I wish I could be surprised by this, but this was, unfortunately, a common thing she does. But even still, I could not help but sigh at the fact.
“Seriously, Kyoka? The quiz is due in two hours. That will be a huge dent if you don’t do it now.”
“I know! But I got so busy this week that I just completely forgot!”
“Huh? I thought you said you finished all your work this week.”
Serena lets out in a soft yet stern manner, which makes Kyoka shudder.
Even when I’m not the one in trouble, I’m also a bit on edge as Kyoka, and I look over at Serena. She had her usual composed smile, but the feeling radiating from her was terrifying.
Kyoka quickly tries calming her down with a dry chuckle as she scratches her head.
“I-I guess I forgot to do it whenever I’m with you.”
“Oh? Is that so? And our promise that we would put our schoolwork first before we can go on dates?”
“I-I’m sorry...”
Kyoka apologetically bows while Serena folds her arms with a bit of pout. Serena lets out a small sigh before turning to Kyoka.
“Kyoka-chan. If you don’t turn in this quiz or it’s turned in late, no kissing for a month.”
“Eh? Are you serious?”
“Hmph.”
“N-No! Serena. P-Please wait a second!”
Serena looks away while Kyoka frantically flails her arms around in a panic. Her eyes shift, and she looks for something to come to mind. Then, we make eye contact, and she suddenly grabs me by the shoulders.
“Yuto! What should I do?!”
“Huh?! Why are you asking me?!”
“Because my life is at stake here!”
“Aren’t you overreacting a little here?! It’s just kissing.”
“Nooo!!! It’s my reason for living!”
“Please get a better reason.”
“Just... kissing?”
Kyoka and I shudder again in fear. I couldn’t see Serena from where I was, but I could feel the icy cold stare coming from her. I needed to come up with a solution and fast.
“Kyoka! There’s the library! It has computers over there. The quiz only has twenty questions! You can do it in an hour, easy!”
“The library! I forgot I can just log in there!”
Kyoka face-palms while the rest of us let out a collective sigh. Still feeling the glare Serena had, I was pushing Kyoka away.
“Anyways! What are you waiting for? Just go!”
“Got it! Thank you, Yuto, my guardian angel! You’ve been saving my ass constantly the past few days!”
“You can thank me later! Just hurry and get out of here!”
“I’m off! And before I go.”
Kyoka rushes next to Serena and gives her a quick kiss on the cheek.
“Wh-What?!”
Serena was taken aback by the action as Kyoka stepped back with a wink.
“You said only if I missed it, right? So that means I’m still safe~.”
“Jeez, Kyoka-chan!”
Serena blushes heavily as she tries to cover her face again. Seeing Serena like this made Kyoka simply laugh with a cheeky smile. I couldn’t help but be amused by it as well.
But that was when I noticed the time on my phone and called out to Kyoka.
“Oi! Kyoka! The quiz!”
“Ah! Right! Thanks again! I’ll finish it as fast as I can!”
“Take your time!”
I called out as Kyoka dashed away as fast as she could. Serena and I continue to watch her run off into the distance. Once she was entirely out of sight, I sighed deeply while shaking my head in disbelief.
“Seriously. How the hell did all of that get so hectic?”
“It’s her fault for not following the rules we made!”
“Cut her some slack. She has a lot on her plate. The course load we have to deal with this year is rough.”
“I suppose you’re right... Though. You also said something there that concerned me.”
“Ah...”
I could immediately tell what she was referring to. Thinking back to that statement, I couldn’t help but frown at my own statement that I made earlier.
“I’m sorry for being inconsiderate about that... Obviously, it means a lot to you two, and I shouldn’t have said that.”
I picked at my food a little. What I said bothered me for some reason. It bothered me that I was almost too dismissive of such a simple thing that happens in a relationship. It was a joke, but it just felt wrong to me.
“Still. I know that you didn’t mean to say that. Sorry for being angry at you. But that was surprisingly dismissive of you.”
“Yeah. I mean, I don’t think like that. After all, kissing is essential, right?”
“Of course, kissing is essential! It’s special, especially to me... I don’t know how to explain it. It just gives me a lot of comfort.”
“Kyoka didn’t say that it was her reason to live... Still, imagine if some of the people heard me. Wouldn’t that be ironic?”
“It would look awful for your reputation if that happened...”
Serena gave a faint chuckle to my observation.
Silence hung over us as we ate. When talking about Kyoka and Serena’s relationship, I can speak and listen to her. Yet, when the conversation begins to circulate to how I view love, it’s always finicky and challenging for us to describe things.
If there were a word to describe my relationship with love, I would call it a paradox. On one hand, I have never really fallen in love with someone before, yet my life seems so intertwined with the concept of romance that I cannot comprehend it.
“Excuse me. Are you Watanabe-san?”
“Hmm?”
A voice snaps me back to reality as I look up from my bento to see a young girl around my age with long black hair standing before me. She seems somewhat nervous as she fumbles with her hands.
“That’s me. Was there something that you needed from me?”
“Yes. If you don’t mind, I want to ask you something. Co-Could I have a minute of your time?”
“Ah... Sure. Serena?”
I turn to Serena, who looks over at me with a slight nod. She was so used to this happening to me before that she didn’t even object to someone approaching me like this.
“Go ahead. I need to leave for my next lecture anyway.”
“Sorry about that. See you later.”
I quickly packed what was left of my bento and stood beside the girl. I promptly waved at Serena, who waved back before beginning to walk with this new girl. Given how nervous she is with her subtle hand movements and slight stuttering, I can deduce what she’s about to ask me.
Looking over at the girl, I decided to break the silence.
“I suppose we should start with introductions. Watanabe Yuto. Pleasure.”
“Ri-Right. My name is Miyashita Naoki. I’ll be in your care.”
“Miyashita-san... Why don’t we head somewhere that we can sit? I’m pretty sure there’s a cafe where we can talk.”
“Please lead the way.”
“Sure. Follow m-”
As I turned my head forward, I suddenly stopped dead in my tracks and almost bumped into someone walking towards me.
“Ah! Sorry! I wasn’t looking where I was... going.”
My voice trailed off as I recognized the woman standing before me. She had long blond hair wrapped in a ponytail and wore casual yet fashionable clothes that you could find in a fashion magazine.
My mood immediately soured in an instant, and I couldn’t help but sigh in frustration that I knew who it was.
“Ah! N-No. It’s fine. I wasn’t paying attention... either. Ah.”
She recognized me and immediately reacted similarly to how I responded to her, with her demeanor worsening just from seeing me.
I’ve known Nomura Mako since middle school. Although we didn’t talk much then, we hit it off at the same high school. We often hung out together, and I considered her a good friend.
However, an incident happened around that time, and our disagreement caused us to stop being friends. After that, there was always a sense of awkwardness between us, eventually leading to our mild hostility toward one another.
“Nomura-san...”
“Watanabe-kun...”
Our voices are audibly disdainful as we look at each other. We both show a notable scowl, almost as if our entire day was ruined just because we happened to see each other.
However, I should avoid her to not deal with the headache.
“In any case, sorry for bothering you. We’ll be leaving.”
“Hmm? Ah. Y-Yeah.”
I quickly moved my way around and continued to walk without any issues. For a moment, I thought I saw a conflicted look at her that I didn’t understand. But I shouldn’t be giving it a second thought. And yet I couldn’t help but turn around, which caused Miyashita next to me to look back.
There, I saw Nomura looking over in our direction. However, she seemed shocked as she pointed to Miyashita standing beside me.
“Naoki-chan?”
“M-Mako-san?!”
The two called out to each other in surprise. Pointing to each other, the two walked up together. Nomrura looked at Miyashita with a concerned expression.
“What are you doing here? I thought you didn’t have any lectures today!”
“Well... I wanted to talk to my professor briefly before going out for lunch.”
“Is that so? Are you going to meet with Shizuya after?”
“N-No... He’s in a lecture right now. P-Plus, he’d probably rather spend that time with someone else.”
“Oh, come on! Don’t say that. You’re a perfectly good girl. Any guy would be lucky to have you!”
“T-Thank you.”
Miyashita blushes a little from the compliment while Nomura gives her a reaffirming smile. Given how Miyashita reacts, I’m starting to get the bigger picture as I walk over.
“So his name is Shizuya? How long have you two known each other?”
“Eh? Why are you barging in our conversation? That’s a bit rude, don’t you think?”
“If anyone’s barging into a conversation, it’s you, Nomura-san. Miyashita-san was the one who wanted to talk to me.”
“Seriously?!”
Nomura looks over at Miyashita with a baffled expression. Miyashita was embarrassed by the fact now that seemingly everyone knew what she was about to ask.
“Y-Yes, Mako-san... I was going to ask him for that favor.”
“Is that so? I didn’t realize. I’m sorry.”
“N-No... It’s fine. It’s my fault that I need to ask someone for help. Every time that I try, I freeze.”
“W-Well. In that case. Maybe you should try and practice with Watanabe-kun.”
“H-Huh? Practice with him on what?”
“Instead of waiting and steeling yourself up, just ask him now. That way, you can be more confident.”
“Eh??? In public?!”
Miyashita freezes as she looks around her. Many people pass by without a care, trying to get where they need to go. Technically, it counts as being in public. For a shy person like her, it is a good solution to help her manage her nerves.
“I agree with Nomura-san. You can do it just to humor us. Plus, it might help me better understand how to help you.”
“I-I...”
Miyashita looked down, thinking closely about it. Her hands tightened a little as she slowly looked up at Nomura. Nomura gave her friend a reaffirming smile while holding Miyashita by the shoulder. It looked like Miyashita had slightly composed herself.
“W-Watanabe-san!”
“Yes? How may I help you?”
I turned to Miyashita with a small smile. She clenches her hand into a fist before looking at me with a sense of drive. She bows directly towards me.
“Please! I want your help getting together with someone!”
“Is that so?”
I couldn’t help but be flustered by the request, even if I saw it coming. I looked at Nomura for a moment, and I thought I saw a smile coming from her. Despite that, I didn’t need even a moment to consider if I would accept this request. I already knew my answer a while ago.
“Sure. I’ll do the best that I can. Hope we can get along.”
It doesn’t make sense why or how this happened. Someone who doesn’t understand how to fall in love is being asked to help someone confess to someone they like. That seems to be the paradoxical relationship I’ve had with romance. And yet...
I am known as one of the most successful matchmakers in Osaka.
