Just noise

Waking up, you felt the soul-crushing weight of your average Monday. You had to force yourself out of bed.

Her words settled on your mind like bricks. You knew it was the truth, but it still hurt. Your mind raced, thinking about what she said—you still don’t know what to do.

Not knowing what else to do, you went through your morning routine. Your mother’s cold glances as she left the house didn’t bother you anymore. She walked out without a word—nothing unusual. Silence was something you’d become accustomed to.

Suddenly, your phone buzzed. It was your friend.

You didn’t read it.

You weren’t ready to talk to someone you couldn’t afford to mess things up with.

You felt so hollow. So alone. You know it’s your fault, but you were just too afraid.

As always, you turned to online games. Your usual escape.

You played for a while, mostly silent except to ask for help. One person messaged back. They seemed kind of interesting, so you chatted a bit. Eventually, you exchanged socials—not that it meant much. You’re always more open with people when you don’t care what they think. This was no different.

It wasn’t a big deal.

Just something to do.

After getting off the game, you sat in bed for a few hours. Your mind was blank. You weren’t bored—you were just trying not to let yourself think about anything. After a while, you went to make dinner, already almost completely forgetting about that person.

Then, your phone—

Abby – “Hiii”

You opened the app.

Abby – “You’re really cute, you know.”

What? That’s not what you expected at all.

Sure, the photo you used for your profile picture was one of your better ones, but that line made your heart skip a beat.

You stared at the message longer than you’d admit. Your chest tightened—just slightly.

Joey – “?”

Abby – “Just take the compliment lol”

It’s just a compliment. Don’t be weird about it.

Joey – “Uhm thanks I guess”

Your heart skipped again.

There was a long pause. Not wanting to waste the moment, you asked her something.

Joey – “What kind of music do you listen to?”

Abby – “Oh definitely a lot of indie rock and sad songs”

Joey – “Wow same lol”

Another pause.

Joey – “So watcha doin?”

Abby – “Talking to you, silly =) ”

Joey – “No duh lol, I mean anything interesting?”

Abby – “I’m just playin a game :p”

Abby – “Do you play Palmon too?”

Joey – “A little, but not a whole lot.”

Abby – “Cool, let’s play sometime!!”

Joey – “Yeah sure. Anyways, I’ve got some chemistry homework to finish, so I’ll ttyl, ok?”

Abby – “Ok bye bye :)”

She’s certainly something.

Your first thought is that she’s charming and easygoing—disarmingly so. And when your mind starts to drift, maybe, just maybe, you can let go.

But then you feel it. That same freezing burn—sudden and cold—spreading through your throat, stripping your breath from you even just for a few moments.

Lena’s words echo in your head like they never left. Your throat tightens again.

You try to swallow it down, but something flickers. Hesitation. Guilt. Or maybe just old memories crawling back from where you thought you’d buried them.

Your hands feel steady, but your heart is wavering. You say it’s nothing. Just a moment. Just nerves. But her words linger too long in your ears.

And now, everything feels just a little too loud.

And just like that, silence returns.

You stare at the screen in silence. Watching… waiting…

And after a while, you get up.

You have to.