Chapter 1 Little girl
Life never starts off tough. Usually it’s pretty smooth sailing, I mean even for Rose she was born in a typical suburban house dad, mom, brother. She would soon learn though that her existence would be anything but typical. She always knew her family loved her less. She always held out hope though that if she could be good enough they would love her and accept her. Unfortunately that day never came and as she grew so did her understanding that she only had herself to rely on.
Case in point, how about her extended family would disinvite her parents if she was coming. How she was always a trouble maker just by existing. Like when she was 4 and clogged her grandparent’s toliet. Toodler problems right? No! She didn’t know she’d have to live with that mistake for the rest of her life. As her family never forgave her for that.
When she was 8 her mother put her in softball. Seems sweet and productive right? Until you learn that her mother only put her there because her brother was so good at baseball that mom was too busy cheering him on to keep an eye on her. So she let the “team” babysit her and despite Rose’s protests that she didn’t want to play and that nobody on her team liked her and even went so far as to mistreat her. She was forced to stay on the team. Until one day she said, ‘Fuck!’ And the ultra conservative coach threw her off the team. Which. Her parents punished her severely without even asking why she said a word like that. Because the truth was they didn’t care. They cared that she tarnished their reputation.
A couple years later she was visiting her aunt for the weekend her aunt’s step son put his hand down her shirt and tried to feel her up. When she tried to speak up the boy denied and the little girl got called a liar and was told she was causing problems on purpose. She learned then that her family never cared about her truth. As long as they looked good on the surface. No one would expect what came next.
Her parents divorced because her mother was an alcoholic when she was 12. She found out right before a school dance. She couldn’t say anything though as she had snuck a look while her dad was outside and spent the whole dance crying. In a room where no one comforted her but danced around happily. Her mother couch surfed for a while leaving Rose usually alone so she could go drink. Occasionally she’d leave her friends kids for company while the adults went to drink. Until one night her mom invited a marine over.
Well after her and her mother went to bed the marine reappeared beside her while her mother was passed out drunk beside her. She was truly terrified by this man who was rubbing her 12 year old legs trying to get into the bed with her. His advances didn’t stop and she rushed into the bathroom and locked the door behind her. When she thought he had left she tried to open the door when he immediately cornered her in a walk in closet and continued to molest her. When she was finally able to get free she woke her moms roommate up and asked her to stay up with her. While the man crawled in bed with her mother and spent the night. Her mother did nothing about it. Although Rose found out years later her father had called the cops upon picking up his little girl the next morning because as you can imagine Rose was terrified!
Fast forward another two years. The day before her 15th birthday she wakes up to a blood curdling scream like she had never heard. It was her mother. Absolutely and understandably distraught her mother gets out that her step father was found deceased next to her. She was expected to be sad and mourn the loss. Except her step father hated her and he made his feelings known. He liked her brother. ( Everyone did he was the golden child of the family) Now what did all this mean for Rose. Well her birthday was cancelled to deal with the funeral and all the other things that needed to get done. What about her real father you might ask. Well see he was too busy with work and his new girlfriend to really pay her any attention. She was truly the black sheep of the family.
Being the black sheep of the family has been something she had long gotten use to. Unfortunately after her last birthday she fell into a deep depression. Not that anyone noticed. She got so depressed that she attempted suicide. It failed or this would be a really short story. She did try a couple more times before getting the help. And she continued on till her junior year.
When at 17 years old she faced a day that was hard for everyone involved. Rose was the victim of a school shooting. She was a current junior at Santana in San Diego, California. When she was coming out of the library with her friend heading to her class when she saw her friend on the ground with blood coming from his head. Shocked by the sight Rose froze. When she heard the fireworks again, except they weren’t fireworks they were the echoed shot of the gun. She ran the opposite direction and was on lockdown till swat arrived. When they finally evacuated her, Rose couldn’t find her parents but the cameras found her. She was interviewed by more than a dozen reporters that day and a few more the following days. It was the only time in her life that her parents prioritized her over everything else. Her father took the day off and took her shopping ( not that she wanted to go but it was better than going home.) her mother had been comforting her all morning. The parental feelings didn’t last long. And with that Rose went on to her 18th birthday.
Feeling like a grown up just after she turns 18, she decided to take control of her own life and graduated early and started college. Although she was more interested in other aspects of college life such as drinking and boys. As you guess it something happened. She was kicked out of her dad’s home bcause she wasn’t focused enough on school and her father thought she needed “ tough love!” So now here she was. 18 years old no home, no job, she had her car though and that’s where she lived for almost the next 3 years. During that time wasn’t easy for her though.
