Heart Music

As the bus pulled into the venue’s parking lot, I sighed. Frustration or boredom did not cause my sigh. Pure joy caused it. I was relieved at the sight of the place I would perform this weekend.

Traveling was the worst, and I was always happy when we arrived. More than anything, I was eager to get up on stage and work my magic on the crowd…. No, there was something even better; the women who would be waiting for me afterward.

Those sweet, sultry, sensual women who wanted to tempt, tease, and taste me. They were delicious, and I intended to have one tonight. I’d have to pick just the right one, though. I couldn’t have a scandal like last year.

It was hard telling the age of humans. I didn’t realize it would happen to me at such a young age. Though I was over one hundred and fifty years old.

The bus had tinted windows. None of the people we drove past could see me. I liked it that way. Being able to see the world without the world seeing me…. No matter how popular or famous I was, I missed the relative anonymity of my youth. Before I turned fifty and this damned hunger set in.

My manager, Kenji, sat across from me. He was sorting through a mixture of song lyrics, performance requests from the booking agent, and a pile of information on meet-and-greet fans I would see tonight after the show.

Normally, he wasn’t such a mess, but a near miss with some idiot in a convertible made him drop the papers. I held out my hand, and he handed me half of the stack with a grateful expression. Sometimes he could get stubborn and reject my offer.

It wasn’t entirely the near miss with the smaller car, though. Kenji was about sixty years old now. He really should have retired years ago. This wasn’t the life for an old man. Not that he would ever listen to me when I tried to tell him. He just laughed and said I was far older than he was.

While he wasn’t wrong, it was different for me than it was for him. Being part fae meant my life would be a lot longer than his would. I hated the idea of him pushing himself. He already had a heart attack last year and his wife would never forgive me if he died on the road.

Kenji was only twenty when we started my music career. He told me how much he loved listening to me sing at night when he was a kid. It made him happy to spread my music. I couldn’t deny him that.

“Don’t wrinkle the papers,” he grumbled.

“I’m not wrinkling the papers. Put on your glasses, Jiji,” I replied nonchalantly as I sorted them into individual stacks between my fingers.

“You’re wrinkling them.”

“I’m going to wrinkle you if you don’t stop, ani…. Kenji.”

I almost called him big brother. It was hard sometimes.

“Almost slipped again,” Kenji laughed. “Who’s the ‘old man’ now?”

“Shut up. What are these? Performance requests for next year? I told you, Ken. I’m retiring. You are retiring. There is no next year. I haven’t had a new song in almost five years,” I replied.

“That’s what the lyrics are for. If you find a song that speaks to you, we’ll talk to the writer and hire them on to create a new album for you. There’s no reason to stop now.”

“Have you forgotten Youko? She’s waiting for you to come home and her last letter said you were going to be a grandfather. You missed out on your own kids growing up for me. Go home and be there for your grandchild,” I insisted.

He was quiet as he sorted through the papers. The severe expression on his face made him look angry. Kenji had that grumpy old man face ever since he was young. He was lucky to find a woman like Youko, who liked that sort of thing. And she had patience to spare for him and his excuses. She was a blessing.

“Ken? I know that face. You’re hiding something from me. Come on. We’ll be parking soon, and then we won’t have a quiet moment until tomorrow.”

“You have to feed tonight, don’t you?” Kenji asked quietly.

“You know the answer to that. You keep it in your planner. I won’t mess up again. I promise.”

He laughed again, but this time it was dry and mirthless. “How can I retire? Someone has to protect you from the world, Ojīchan.”

“You mean someone has to protect the world from me... don’t you?”

The bus stopped. I stood and placed the stacks of papers on the table. Kenji looked up at me with a pained expression.

I understood the burden he was under, but that was the reason I was retiring. If I went back home with him, he wouldn’t have to follow me all around the world. He could call or come check on me. I wouldn’t go crazy again. It hadn’t happened in decades.

Nothing I said reached him. More than any of my previous caretakers, Kenji was devoted to the work and to me. He was trying to give me the life he thought I wanted.

“It’s time to go.” I told him. “You can come with me, or you can wait until I get inside and they disperse a little.”

Without waiting for an answer, I grabbed my jacket and got off the bus. We were running late. That was why we took the tour bus instead of waiting for the car we hired. Someone mixed up the times when they gave us the schedule and we were an hour behind.

To Kenji, that meant we were horribly behind. In reality, it meant we were a half hour late. He was always a half hour early to everything and ensured that I was as well.

Punctual to the point of tediousness, the boy never learned to take his time instead of rushing everything. I hoped retirement would give him an appreciation for the smaller moments in life and for slowing down to look around him.

I may have a very long life, but it only made me more aware of how fleeting it was for humans. My older brother only lived to be about fifty-three. Sure, lifespans were longer now, but they weren’t as long as my own.

“Aries! Don’t you walk away from me!” Kenji shouted.

Part of me hated when he used my fake name, but I knew he would never speak my real name outside of the privacy of our homes or hotel rooms. Not even when we were on the bus. Not after what we learned when I came out as fae.

Stopping, I turned to him with a scowl on my face. “What?”

“This is not the time for you to get angry,” he replied in Japanese. “If you do, you might hurt someone without meaning to.”

“I wasn’t angry until you came out here shouting like you were scolding a naughty child! You might think I get irrational when I need to feed, but I don’t! I messed up once. ONE TIME in over one hundred and fifty years of living. You weren’t even alive!”

“And I never would have lived if you had gone on much longer!” Kenji yelled back.

Looking away, I closed my mouth and scowled at the ground. I was always more emotional when I was hungry. He was right. I had to control my temper. A rampage was the last thing either of us needed. Who knew what would come after me to right whatever wrong I did.

“I’m sorry. Ken, I want you to retire. I’ll go home with you. We never have to leave again. You can be with your family,” I said quietly.

“You don’t have to give up your life for me. I told you, I’d take care of you. It’s my responsibility.”

“No. It’s not. You shouldn’t have to carry this burden.”

“Come on. We should go inside so I can take care of the arrangements. You need to relax. I have lined up several young women for the tail end of the meet and greet after the show. They are guaranteed to be adults. We’ll find you someone to feed on,” he told me, and patted my shoulder with a smile.

He was trying to get me to calm down by changing how he acted. This wasn’t the time to get angry. I needed to make them think I was happy to be there. Their energy was much sweeter when they were happy.

I grinned and switched back to English. “Good. I can’t wait to meet my fans.”

Kenji nodded and led me toward the arena where I’d be performing. The handful of women who were waiting surged forward and reached out for me while calling my name. I took their hands and signed autographs. I gave them kisses on their cheeks and greeted them as they told me their names.

All the while, I felt Kenji’s eyes on me. He’d ensure their safety as much as he could.