Chapter 1
I sit here with tears running down my face.
The memory of us long ago seems like just yesterday.
Everything ended as fast as it began.
Never again has anyone kissed me the way you did.
The perfect, broken and forbidden romance we had.
I ran into your arms when you were in need; we wiped the tears from the other’s eyes.
The warm summer days are sad now without you by my side.
No more shining blue eyes that stared back at me when I wake.
My hands are soft and still young but feel so weak and old without you there to help guide me through hell.
Laughter inside me died the day our lips last parted.
The joy of all kinds in the world changed when I lost you.
I believed I’d found the embrace I sought in others, one by one, but I was mistaken.
Never could I replay or replace the hole in my heart now that it finally dawned on me you are that missing piece.
Regret plagues me like a sickness that never lifts.
A mist of depression swept in, and I tried to keep going on in life, but it’s lost in an endless void of hell.
Where is the warm hand that helped guide me out of hell?
Without the light in your eyes, how will I find my way?
On my knees, full of doubt and pain, I feel the despair take over me.
My mistakes have left me lost forever.
I’m only able to see life through a crack in the darkness of my hourglass that is almost overflowing.
I am my downfall, and I hope now as my world comes crashing down that you succeed where I failed.
Your laugh I long for still intoxicates me in my memory.
My heart skips a beat and flutters still when I think of our long days and nights together.
Sunlight is fading, and the moon is rising once again, and I’m unchanged.
To see you one last time... one last moment in your arms, to fall over laughing again in the heat of summer.
It is so cold in here, my heart that I shut off in hopes to stop the pain.
So silent, but there is still a raging howl beating me even with my walls built up high.
It should have been different, yet it concluded because of my actions.
Took the words of another, and we turned against each other.
Rage and pain inflicted us both like cancer from the lies we were told by those we held dear.
Many years it took to have our path cross once more.
I shed tears over uncovered lies and traitors that caused us bloodshed.
We can’t take back the past, but we embraced from afar like star-crossed lovers over it all.
The truth revealed many ugly things we regret; we did and said what needed to be.
Never again will we face each other, after being so forcibly separated.
There is always a place for the other to know where we differ from the heart.
This meeting ground is one of deep sadness, and more regret than words can say, but it is our place.
In the end, I leave, returning to my life of pretending.
Never again could I be the real me.
Laughter was deep and loud, but inside I was screaming.
Smiling was a chore to keep up a good show.
Embracing another just felt odd and cold.
My heart stayed as hollow as my womb, and I lost the chance to give life and to live.
It wasn’t just your loss that brought me down; it was me finally letting reality sink in.
Hourglass nearly full, my hands are forever cold, my heart beats at a melancholy pace.
Lips are wet from tears, and the salt is the only pain I wish I could feel.
How we parted ways was so painful, but we both knew it would end up just like how it started again, so I watched you walk away knowing this time... forever.
Time passes, and I grow older; a dream of you one night sends shivers all over me.
Had I finally forgotten and moved on?
I journey to our spot, and I see still from a distance... the rose.
With this, my heart filled with life and warmth returned to me, and the walls crumbled.
Tears filled my eyes, and I sit here as I place my rose across from yours.
The sun shines down on me, and its warmth and sweet honeysuckle on the warm air envelop me.
It was time, but not my time; this I knew now, and with that, I stood up feeling renewed.
I take a last glance at the sight and know you’re there in spirit with us, and it will all be okay.
Why do you wonder?
A long lost rose from us both placed at a sacred place to remind the other that no matter how far apart we are, we’re still in the other’s heart.
