Chapter One – The Broken Ladder
Chapter One – The Broken Ladder
When you try so hard to keep up with life
But in the end, you fall into a deep hole
And the ladder inside… won’t help you get out
It was 6:00 a.m.
The city hadn’t woken up yet
Fog crawled into the corners like a quiet thought
Eileen stood in front of the mirror
She stared at herself, waiting for something to change
But nothing did
Except… she was forgetting more things lately
Her toothbrush slipped from her hand
She laughed
Then bent to pick it up
Her fingers trembled
Not the first time
She left home without breakfast
As always
Her mother said gently while tidying the kitchen,
“You haven’t been eating well lately.”
Eileen replied from behind the door,
“I have a morning exam.”
It wasn’t a lie
But it wasn’t the full truth either
On the train, she sat far from everyone
Put on her earbuds
No music
Just silence between her and the world
Someone sat across from her
A young man with sad eyes
Not broken—just… carrying something
He looked at her and said without warning,
“Do you sleep badly?”
She raised an eyebrow
“Why?”
He pointed at her eyes
“They betray you.”
She ignored him
But he didn’t seem random
Before getting off, he left a small note
Just a number
And one word:
“If you're tired… call.”
She didn’t call
But she didn’t throw it away either
That night
She wrote in her phone’s notes app
No title
No date
> “There’s a faint sound in my head
It says nothing clear
But it never stops.”
**
At the university
She was performing
Smiling at the professor
Sitting in the second seat from the right
Writing notes that weren’t hers
Not understanding any of it
Her classmate, Joo-yeon, laughed loudly,
“Eileen, you look like you're from another planet lately!”
She laughed too
Or pretended to
Then said,
“Maybe I’m not really from here.”
**
After class
A message popped up
Unknown number
> “Did you sleep last night?”
She froze
She hadn’t saved the number
But it was him
She deleted the message
But her heart kept repeating it
On the way back
She passed the small mental health clinic near the library
Stared at the sign
Then whispered to herself,
“Even if I went in… I wouldn’t say anything.”
**
At home
Her family was eating dinner
She sat with them
But didn’t eat
She laughed at her father’s joke
But her heart didn’t
In her room
She curled under the blanket
A sound outside
Then another message
> “The ladder won’t help you climb
But it’s not the only thing in the hole.”
She looked at the old note
Still hidden in her drawer
And said:
“Who are you?”
But she didn’t send it
Just locked her phone
And stayed awake
Until her heart finally slept
