Second Chances

Today marks six months since the start of my new job. I’ve been in my current role for exactly half a year, and while that might not sound like much to anyone else, to me it’s everything. It means I’m settled. It means I’m secure. Most importantly, it means I’m safe.

I’d turned my life around so completely that instead of avoiding police stations like I once did, I was now working in one. Talk about a full-circle moment. My new job as an administrative assistant at the local police station had become my anchor—a sign that I’d finally left my old life behind.

This morning began like any other: familiar, predictable, almost comforting. But it ended very differently.

Because today, he arrived.

A ghost from my past.

That day felt like any other, at least at first. I woke up at the usual time in the comfort of my king-sized bed in the bedroom of the cramped flat I’d called home for the past nine months. The morning unfolded in a blur of routine: a quick shower, the familiar scent of my strawberries and cream shampoo lingering in the steam, then slipping into my standard uniform of a crisp button-up blouse and fitted pencil skirt. I ate my muesli, drank my usual strong coffee, and headed out the door without a second thought.

Everything was ordinary. Predictable. Comfortably monotonous.

I took the same route through the quiet streets, the radio mumbling softly in the background as the morning sun spilled across the dashboard. My hair, long and blonde, curled just the way I liked it, framed my face, which I had carefully perfected with the same makeup I wore every day a mask I’d grown used to.

Anyway, you get the idea nothing about that morning had felt out of the ordinary from the moment I’d woken up.

When I arrived at work, I exchanged a few cheerful greetings with my colleagues as I made my way to the kitchen for my second cup of coffee of the day.

I found my friend Nicole already there, preparing my coffee just the way I liked it: white with one sugar. The comforting aroma filled the small, cluttered kitchen, wrapping me in a sense of familiarity.

“Morning, beautiful,” I said, leaning in to kiss her cheek as she handed me the warm mug.

Nicole had been by my side for the past year. We’d started working at the station on the same day, both of us new recruits in the world of police admin work. Over time, we’d become inseparable, and I often thought of her as the sister I never had. She’d been my anchor through it all, especially as life had felt like it was spiralling out of control before I landed this job. For that, I was endlessly grateful.

“Anything new?” she asked, a mischievous glint in her eye as she flashed me an expectant smile.

“No and I still can’t believe you did that to me,” I scolded, narrowing my eyes at her.

Nicole had signed me up for a dating website without telling me. Mortified didn’t even begin to cover how I’d felt when I found out. Horrified was closer but still didn’t quite capture the absolute dread that washed over me. I knew she meant well her heart was always in the right place but I had zero interest in meeting some dodgy catfish online, and she knew it.

“Lo, you know I’m just trying to help,” she said quietly, giving me a pointed look. “It’s been, what, a year since you’ve been... you know...serviced on the regular.”

She was right it had been that long. The truth was, I’d always been a bit of a wild child. But by twenty-two, I’d finally managed to get my life on track, to find some kind of stability. I’d built something solid for myself, something I was beginning to be proud of.

But my heart... well, that was another matter entirely. Of course, it still beat in my chest, 120 beats per minute but it hadn’t been whole for a long time. A tiny, stubborn piece of it was stuck in the past, claimed by someone I’d met when I was only fourteen, a child. Although, I’d tried to forget him for the past year. No amount of distance or time had loosened his grip on me.

Cam. Cameron Davis. Owner of said piece of heart. Just the thought of his name sent a swarm of butterflies fluttering through my stomach, heat spreading low in my belly. I sucked in a shaky breath, trying to steady myself trying to feel normal again.

“...Lo. Lo. Lola, come back to me.”

Oh god, not again. I was getting better, I swear. But the blush betrayed me, rising hot and furious in my cheeks as I turned to Nicole with a sheepish smile.

“Lo, Cameron Outlaw Davis is a no-go, remember? Your rules,” Nicole said firmly, levelling me with a knowing look. “I know you were just thinking about him you had those googly eyes. Remember: forwards, not backwards. Onwards and upwards, and all that bullshit.”

She was right. It had taken me time and more pain than I’d ever admit to get where I am now. Like I said, I really am better these days. I’ve come to see Cam as an unhealthy addiction I needed to break. I’d been Cam sober for a year now, ever since the night I’d slipped out of our home while he slept, gathering what was left of my self-respect and disappearing into the darkness.

I’d moved a few towns away from him and his circle of friends, determined to detox from our chaotic, all-consuming chemistry, the kind of chemistry that felt like true love and a death sentence rolled into one.

I knew Nic only wanted the best for me. But the truth was, after being with Cam, I doubted any other guy would ever measure up. I’d made my peace with that. Sure, I still went out sometimes, still hooked up when I needed the release but a relationship with a regular, normal guy? That was off the table. It was the price I’d have to pay for giving my heart, and my virginity, to the devil himself.

“Nic... I know. I know, and you know. Maybe one day,” I sighed, trying to smile but feeling the weight of it all.

“Lola, you’re a beautiful, smart, strong, independent woman,” she said, her voice soft but unwavering. “It’s time for you to move on.”

I nodded, swallowing the lump in my throat. She was right, and I knew it. Nic had met me not long after I’d moved here, when I was an absolute wreck. Back then, I was fragile and unsure of myself, constantly doubting every decision and second-guessing every feeling. There were nights I nearly caved, nearly packed up and drove back to him to beg for another chance. Twice, I almost did.

But Nic was right, I was stronger now. I’d built a life I actually loved, one that was mine alone.

“Oh, I’ve moved on,” I said firmly, meeting her eyes with a resolve I hadn’t felt in a long time.

“Uh-huh, you just keep telling yourself that,” she teased, rolling her eyes with a grin. “Anyway, chick, we’d better get to work.”

I sighed, glancing at the clock. She was right time had slipped away from us. “Meet me at lunch?” I asked, even though it was our usual routine.

“Yep, see you then,” she called over her shoulder, already heading off down the hallway in the opposite direction.

I turned toward my desk, mentally preparing myself for the day ahead, when I spotted PC Tim walking straight toward me. I cringed inwardly, there was no escape. He always managed to corner me for a chat.

“Good morning, Lola! How are things with you?” he asked, his grin stretching ear to ear.

I forced a polite smile, clutching my coffee cup like it was a shield. “Oh, you know, same old, same old,” I said brightly, praying he wouldn’t linger.

Tim’s enthusiasm was almost impressive this early in the morning. “Glad to hear it! Big plans for the weekend?” His eyes sparkled with curiosity or maybe it was just the fluorescent lights glinting off his eagerness.

I let out a small, awkward laugh. “Nothing too exciting. Probably just a date with my couch and watch some bad TV.”

He chuckled, a little too loud for my liking. “That’s the best kind of weekend if you ask me.”

I nodded, inching sideways toward my desk, hoping he’d take the hint. But of course, he didn’t.

My stomach flipped uncomfortably. Tim was nice, too nice, and I’d never been good at letting people down gently.

I returned his smile with a friendly one of my own, careful to keep it polite. The thing was, I was fairly sure Tim liked me, liked me in a way that went far beyond friendship, and it made me more than a little uncomfortable.

He wasn’t unattractive, not at all. In fact, most people would probably call him handsome, maybe even hot. But for me, there was something missing. There was no spark, no electricity. No raw, irresistible pull.

From what I’d seen, Tim was a bit of a wet blanket. Sweet, yes, but timid. I needed someone who could take charge, someone with a hint of danger and a lot of passion. Someone who’d keep me on my toes. Tim... well, he was nice. And nice didn’t get my engine running.

I always made sure to be polite, careful not to lead him on or give him any false hope but still tried to keep our interactions friendly enough to avoid awkwardness in the workplace.

The problem was, no matter how many hints I dropped, or how clearly, I thought I’d drawn my line, Tim didn’t seem to have gotten the memo.

“Well Tim. I’m glad your good,” I replied, keeping my tone light.

“I can’t complain, Lola,” he said, his smile widening. “Although things would definitely improve if you’d come out for that drink with me. I heard through the grapevine that you’ve set up a dating profile. But there’s really no need for that, if you ask me, I’d be more than happy to wine and dine you anytime. Just say when and where.”

And there it was: Tim. Nice, but painfully clueless.

I forced another polite smile. “Oh, Tim, you know how busy I’ve been,” I lied smoothly. “And honestly, I can’t even begin to explain how embarrassed I am about that dating profile. I promise you; I didn’t make it myself. I’m really not interested in dating right now.”

Tim’s brows furrowed slightly. “Well, you’re a catch, Lola, but the offer won’t be on the table forever. Let me take you out and show you a good time,” he said with a wink.

I felt something sick rise in my throat and quickly covered it with a cough, hoping he wouldn’t notice.

“As wonderful as that sounds, Tim, it’s still a no. I appreciate the offer, though. I’m sure you’d make some lucky lady a perfect date.”

For a moment, Tim held my gaze longer than necessary, his expression almost blank, like he wasn’t quite sure how to take my rejection. Then, with a heavy stomp of his foot, he turned and walked away, just like he had so many times before, leaving me to the safety of my desk.

I sighed as I settled into my chair, silently praying that would be the last of Tim’s awkward advances for the day.

Moving my mouse to wake up my computer, I caught sight of the towering stack of filing piled beside my desk. Mondays, got to love them. At least the mountain of paperwork promised to make the day fly by.

A cheerful ping signalled a new internal email. I couldn’t help but smile when I saw it was from Nicole.

Hey again,

Just a heads-up: Fred said Tim is planning to ask you out again today.

Be prepared.

Love ya, Nic xxxxx

I laughed aloud, shaking my head before tapping out a quick reply.

Ergh, Nic,

Too late. Just saw him. Crushed his dreams, again.

See you at lunch.

Love, Lo x x x

Barely a few seconds passed before her reply popped up.

Oh, Lo,

I shouldn’t laugh, but... poor Tim.

Have you heard about that drug bust today?

Anyway, I want all the deets at lunch.

Love you, Nic xxxxx

I shook my head with a quiet chuckle. Poor Tim, my arse. I was about to type a reply when the looming pile of filing caught my eye again. It wasn’t going to sort itself. I’d catch up with Nic at lunch.

Turning to the stack, I sighed and got to work, grateful for the momentary peace on my floor. Level 1, where I worked, was home to the uniformed officers. Below us, in the basement, known around here as the lock-up, were the cells, where suspects were held after being brought in. Then there was Level 2, where Nic worked alongside the plainclothes officers, inspectors, and detectives.

Our station wasn’t exactly big, this was a small town, after all, but Level 1 was usually a hive of activity. Officers coming and going, paperwork being filed, cases discussed in hushed, urgent tones. Today, though, it felt oddly quiet, almost like the calm before a storm.

I glanced around and spotted PC Luke at his desk, tapping away on his computer. Technically, it was a bit early to take a break, but the thought of escaping the endless monotony of filing for a few minutes filled me with a little spark of joy.

I rose from my chair and made my way over to Luke’s desk.

“Morning, Luke. What’s going on today? Where is everybody?” I asked, leaning casually against the edge of his desk.

“Oh, hey, Lola.” He looked up from his computer, eyes brightening a little. “Haven’t you heard? There’s a big drug bust going down at the old docks. Some gang-related operation. I’m not on it, but a ton of work has gone into this. Intel came in from neighbouring stations, and we’ve been called in as backup. They’ve been watching this crew for a while, hoping to finally shut down a major drug ring. It’s pretty much all hands-on deck. Put the little bastards behind bars and all that.”

“Wow, no, I hadn’t heard. Now that you mention it, I think Nicole did say something earlier,” I admitted, frowning slightly. “I completely agree, Luke. Get them locked up where they belong. But it sounds dangerous. I hope everyone makes it back safe.”

“Me too, Lola. But armed response and intelligence are on scene. Sounds like it’s wrapping up now anyway. They’ve already made a bunch of arrests. I think a couple might be brought here, seems like quite a haul. We’ll know more once they’re back,” Luke said, leaning back in his chair.

“That’s good to hear. Thanks, Luke. I guess I should get back to my filing,” I said with a small sigh, genuinely meaning it.

Luke chuckled. “Ha, yeah, you probably should. But try not to work too hard, it’ll be lunchtime soon enough,” he added with a grin.

I glanced instinctively at the clock, wow, it really was almost lunch. I smiled back at him before heading to my desk.

I couldn’t put it off any longer. I dove into the rest of the filing and just managed to finish up as lunchtime arrived. I was tidying my workspace when a sudden swell of loud voices pulled my attention. I turned to see officers streaming back in, their laughter and congratulatory back slaps echoing through the room.

From the looks of it, the bust had gone well. Relief settled in my chest at the thought of those criminals no longer roaming the streets.

I couldn’t help but smile at their banter.

A flicker of old memories tried to claw its way in, mistakes I’d made, dangerous choices I’d once chased. I shook my head firmly. That girl was gone; my past was exactly where it belonged: behind me.

I grabbed my phone and handbag, heading toward the back door of the first floor to meet Nic for our lunch break. My mind was already on coffee, gossip, and the chance to breathe.

Barely outside, I fumbled in my bag for my cigarettes. Finding them at last, I crossed the car park to the smoking hut and sat down, taking a deep drag as I waited for Nicole.