Grape Buttons
I go to a strict school, exclusive, everyone here has a goal and has a path, everyone here struggles together and are close to one another, but here its ruthless, eat or be eaten, thats why everyone has their own little bubble.
Mondays our school has a tradition of pride, respect to the values as a school. A tight and stuck up all black uniform with a black cap with golden ornaments, with oddly grape shaped buttons with are all adorned with a golden chrome.
I stand in line and in the heat usually just waiting for the ceremony to end. I have no friends, and no social life, most of my school day resides in isolation mostly, not that i mind it, why should i bow and lick the boots of Strangers
just to get validation? I am myself and me, and I will stand for it. I have no problems at school apart for one, sometimes, the silence drives me mad. When you go to the quietest room in the world, you can start hearing your heart beat, then your blood flow, then your muscles moving, then your skin stretching, cells dying, it drives people mad, and they usually cannot last for a while. I, I am different but not superhuman, no friends means you are alone, and you find yourself in a mental room the sameas the quiet room with foam pyraminds, your thoughts become very apparent, but i have long managed to work around it, Every night, before i sleep and after i study, I think for hours on end, trying to find if i can a root, and that usually ends the problem. My bed is also one problem.
this dense city i live in was not a part of the plan when they built my room, the adjacent buildings cover my sunlight and is away from any other source of light, we had the window boarded up a while ago to better the privacy, but it only worsened the mood of the room, Artificial light covers most of my room and with no airflow and no sunlight, i am forced to live in this room where time is but a number and a number only. i have no sense of time at night, and often i think past where i should be asleep. Because of this i am an insomniac, well i am not a doctor so some other cause might explain this.
Most people will think my life is peaceful, but infact it is the opposite, my mind is plagued with thoughts constantly, so i am not entirely “free of action” you could say i have a social life, with: me, I, and myself, and these three friends fight constantly.
Every night after college preparations, i take the same dark alley home, and with it, it carries utter silence, not a single person in up awake at this hour and i am left again alone with my thoughts, I consider myself a very logical person, analytical, the only soulful hint inside of me is a drive, a longing a desire which haunts me, and this desire is completely unexplainable, except for one feature and it is one that is absurd, a whirring thaat almost seems mechanical, a loud and large sound that fills my head, i cover my ears as an inscinct but to no avail, that sound is coming from inside of me. A haunting sound which in esscence can only be described as a scream of death from sources of literature i have read, This auditory illusion is the desire i have. My mind is.... mostly clear, some days my mind fills with this smoke, that feels so suffocating, or maybe steam. This damp and wet atmosphere clouds my mind like no other, and in essence i am not able to think about anything else, maybe not a fog, maybe like a radio, or a hundred or so, each individual radio focused on its own broadcasting, each is loud and clear and is equally important, where i have a reason to listen to all, to no avail. This puts me in a stasis, where logic is unsure. in days like this i am also not able to sleep.
Yesterday i had a normal day in school, normal all except for one interaction. Wednesday meant we wore the crimson uniform, which was often too hot for the class to handle, and every person decide to leave the jackets nearby in situationswhere teachers are unseen, most of the students are straight As, so most teachers and admin couldnt care less. In the 26 buildings that adorned this massive school 2 have rooftop basketball fields, which are usually locked, most days are too hot for the summer anyways so most of these fields are relics of a time before the school had built indoor fields with air conditioning. I have my lunch here. this is my place of solitude, where i can see the most sunlight, and read to my hearts content, By pure chance it appears that someone before me had thought of putting a beach umberrella that has a connected table and a beach lawn chair. I do most of my reading here after changing to different clothing, The basketball field includes three occasianally working showers that i can take before going to class, wednsday has a longer lunch period. this shower reinvigorrates me with new energy for life, and ive had this habbit the moment i accidentally found the key while rumaging through old library sections.
What makes today odd happenned when a flock of birds was flying in the distance ahead, for a moment, they slowed down, it was almost like an illusion but it was too real for too long. This might be because of my hallucinations i thought, because everything went back to normal, but then, it happened again, and again. At the mcdonalds, peoples voices got deeper, and theyre
movements slower and slower. To a point where i cant deny it, time was slowing down. It was surreal, it was like an accidental instinc, found completely by accident, the best way i could describe it, is the difference between the sweet smell of detergent, and perfume. Both are refreshing but each is different, the moment i could identify it
i could do it by instinc now. The possibilities, i can finish every concievable thing i wanted, it was the greatest feeling of relief. then came the realization, ive had time, and more time isnt going to do anything so i went about my normal day, eventually using it to only prolong my wednesday break time. Then something stranger happened at wednesday,
it was surprising, i have initially thought i have fallen asleep and was dreaming of the bahamas, until i stepped off and felt th very real sand, which is still in the realm of dreams. Until i slipped and fell, where that would usually wake one up from a dream, something different happened. I felt pain.
It was there that without most of the doubt that i initially had, i know that i was in the bahamas, somehow. A week pass without anomalies happening like that again so i was sure that my life has returned to a normal habitual state. My mind has done one thing that it hasnt done in a while, which is reject, i was generally not interested in these events and i was generally surprised
But then i know exactly why it has been like that, like a ringing tinnitus that you only hear when things are quiet, i notice that strong desire more than ever, it was a sense of longing, a feeling of ending, The best way to describe it is nearing the ending to your favourite stories, when you know that this is the last time you will experience that story, that nothing new will
come of it. That sense of melancholy, that longing, and its something i am losing even more sleep over, my eyebags are tunring a deep colour, and every movement aches. for the first time in a while, i felt inclined to get help, somewhere, for i wanted to get this feeling away, or to atleast get a remedy.
a club which i expected to be a fanclub for a show which calls abnormal abilities “quirks”, intrigues me when i read the description ” A club for those who have super-human quirks! 20 members are growing strong together! forum and discussions for new seasons weekly!” which seems inline “Disclamer: We are not responsible for possible: infections, injuries, mental illneses which include: depression, anxiety, dementia, parkinsons,, manipulation, disabillities which include: deafness, blindess, speech impements
amputated limbs, paralizations,, death that includes: poisoning, blunt force trauma, hemmoraging, gunshot wounds, projectile wounds, electrocution, burning, drowning, suicide, join with discresion.” When i initially joined the club, the fans interviewed me to no avail, and decided that they will not let me in, a senior then handed me a black, worn, namecard before i left the club room area, which had me perplexed. he was a nobody, just like me, which made me even more confused, even more perculiar is that the quirk club had more than the 20 members. When i looked at the namecard, it was a old decrepid namecard which looks like it has been in his wallet for a while, the top half of the namecard is completely worn, as the bottom half is in supreme condition, it was clear that this namecard has been here for a while, for a senior from university section to give me this was very perculiar. When i searche the school archive for this club, the letters of the card is still in pristine condition, It says “Distinguished Section for the Higly Abled, Administration room B201” it appears it has been discontinued for quite a while. not only that, but the club themselves have some significant history, except for one anomaly, which is that they have no written activities or events ever. Before my anomalies, i couldve just passed these as fictive, made-up, and a part of me still thinks that way, but as i stand, i have no other channel to turn to that is in immediate proximity, I have no friends, my family is working outside of the country, my extended family lives outside of town, i have no relationships with anyone in school, and have no regular interactions which can help me in any way. So out of a blind leap of faith, well maybe out of considering all other options, this is the only sliver of hope left to remedy this feeling and, even for an insomniac, get at least a little sleep.
Come to think of it now, i find it perculiar that there is a class in the basement levels of the school, let alone in the purely administrative building. Though clubs inside the administrative building is not unheard of, the two examples being the newspaper club and the student council if you count it. But it appears that the clubs that were in the admin building had some impact or power inside the school. The name stuck up to me too, the “distinguished section”, a designated class for certain clubs who have the power to scout and recruit members outside of the school, as well as plan their own trips, The only two examples being the football and swim teams, whose club situation garners a need to go outside the country for competitions. Then comes the final part, the “highly abled” Why would this club need highly abled students when the highly abled go to any subject club, the student council, or any of the large sports divisions. I thought all of this on the long way to the admin building, which sat on one corner of the school. The Club room was two floors down from the unused parking basement, which air became stuffy instantly. As i said before only two clubs exist in this bulding, and both clubs are the oldest and most prominent clubs of the school, The quirk club also has a long history in the school, despite the tv-show being released decades after. The room was unlocked, a dark atmosfere with a dimly lit meeting table which seems dusty apart from one prominent spot, the air was also less stuffy than the basement adjacent, so i figured someone mustve been here recently, but only a small number of people. As you can imagine i am on extremely high alert, so far the predicament has been extremely suspicious, at it appears i am messing with powers i was not supposed to know of. To my relief, a senior came in the room, He was slightly taller than average with short black hair, a pair of glasses and a napkin in his breast pocket, he had skin that was extremely pale, he looked like a model student, He eventually confirmed “I have heard on eof my former co-workers has given you the namecard, since this club is just about to be disbanded, im afraid there is nothing we can do as a organization, though i will make an exception for you, as a personal favour, what have you been experiencing lately?” I was confused, i have never mentioned a word since i came in the room, and i can sense that he also knows of this fact, as if to say that he knows what he is dealing with, and that I shouldnt waste any of his time. I came in direct,
“I have been experiencing absurd phenomena lately, which is paired with a constant emotion of doom”
“Oh yes and how long had you have this “emotion of doom?“”
“About three weeks after the second phenomena happened”
“And may i ask what the phenomena is?”
“What i can only describe as teleportation is the second phenomena before these emotions”
At this point he seems more intrigued, as if that was as sign of something
“And might i ask what the first phenomena is?”
“The ability to slow down time at will”
after i revealed this fact a long silence emerged throughout the room, it was as if he was in deep thought, he stood silence but i knew what he wanted to do is take me my the cuffs and interrogate me, it was like i have just said that i have won the lottery and have not cashed in. after some time his composure maintained and he continued:
“I am afraid this case is not for me to handle, as i am the sole member of the club, i will have to refer you to the club administrator, which has a better amount of knowledge on this subject.”
