She wants too...

She wants to be happy —

but happiness feels dangerous,

like the moment she lets it in,

it’ll find a way to leave.

She wants to cry —

but she’s scared people will see

how close she is to falling apart.

She wants to make friends —

but she’s been hurt before,

and now her walls feel safer

than anyone’s arms.

She wants to love —

but what if love doesn’t stay?

What if it walks away

and takes what’s left of her with it?

She wants to speak —

but what if no one listens?

What if her voice

is just noise in the background?

She wants to live —

but the weight of this world

makes every day feel heavier.

She wants to die —

but forever feels too empty,

too quiet,

too cold.