His World of Desires (Vol 2)

[His World of Desires (Vol 2)]

In the depths of the night, hope became a distant memory for him.

Lost in the wounds of his past, he whispered to his world, “I can’t sleep.”

It responded with doubt and shame.

Its voice—calm and bold—could be mistaken for that of a god, which was ironic, since no one had ever heard it speak before.

“Peter, just try. Look, I know you can. It’s late.”

“Why do you sound like you’re asleep? Like you rest?”

“I’m not a god…”

“Then what are you?” he asked, curiosity rising beyond the horizon.

“I see where you’re going with this. It’s not time yet.”

“I find that hard to believe,” he sighed, gently shifting in his bed.

“Then believe what you want to believe. Good night.”

“But… wait…”

His world fell silent.

He gazed at the ceiling until sleep finally took him.

His world reappeared, everything seemingly back to normal.

On the journey through his imagination, his mind remained tethered to the persistence and blooming story of that world.

He believed—almost certainly—that it had been restored to its original form.

Michelle was there, sitting alone in the park beside the swings, looking as radiant as ever.

Her skin glowed softly, and her dreamy eyes caught his attention like they always had.

He approached her with a rising smile, afraid to look back, his eyes locked on her.

“Hi,” he said, waving his right hand in greeting.

“Hi,” she replied, glancing at him briefly.

“Why are you sitting all by yourself?” he asked, his words dancing off his lips, relaxed and free.

“I mean; I don’t have any friends. It’s just my brother and me. Honestly, it’s been really hard for us. So, to answer your question—I’m a lady in distress. I don’t like to conform or appease,” she said, turning her face dimly toward him before looking away again.

His thoughts blended—emotions swirling with endless questions. He was confused. Isn’t this his world?

“Michelle, you don’t have to be alone. I’m here for you,” he said with determination, reaching out to hold her hand—but something stopped him.

Michelle fixed her eyes on him, her face confused, as she posed a simple question.

“How do you know my name? Who are you?”

“You don’t know who I am now? C’mon babe, it’s me.” He smiled, stepping closer.

But she stepped back.

“Why are you moving away from me?” he asked, his face clouded with sadness and confusion.

“I don’t… know who you are. And I’m sorry, but I need to go,” she said, rising to her feet and walking away in a rush. She pulled on a tattered black cloak and a hat to hide herself from the crowd. She looked back at Peter—her eyes filled with horror, sorrow, and pain—then turned away toward her destination.

He felt deflated, a tear slipping from his right eye as he recalled his lost love, trapped in the circle of loneliness.

“Yeah,” he whispered, waking up in the real world—with the same tear from his dream.

The truth was yet to be revealed.

He sensed a stirring in his soul—his world calling out to him. His mental state shifted for two days, lost in the absence of his love, Michelle.

“My world… what is going on?” he asked softly.

“What do you mean?” his world responded in a deep tone.

“Was I dreaming? Or is my world no longer mine? Please… fill me in.”

“What did you see? Are you implying you were in another world?”

“Yes, I think… wait, why are you asking as if you don’t already know?”

“Because I don’t. Actually, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”

“I’m listening. You really owe me an explanation,” he said, rising from his bed.

“That wasn’t your world…”

“Yes, I caught that. Just tell me it’s temporary—that I won’t keep returning to it every time I’m unconscious.”

His world remained silent for two minutes.

“Please, I need to know. I deserve to know.”

Tears threatened to spill from his eyes.

I wanted answers, yet my world hid the truth from me: that it could never be restored by my own power. It needed True Love—something I was failing to believe in.

“It is well,” his world finally said, “and safe from all danger, but…”

“But what?” I pressed.

“Everyone is gone. And I cannot bring them back. Especially Michelle.”

“Why are you quoting her name? Is she trouble?”

“Peter… Michelle is gone. She no longer exists in your world. I’m sorry,” it concluded.

Peter was left in a terrible state. Tears cascaded down his cheeks as he recalled the joyous, wonderful moments he’d shared with her.

“I love you…” Michelle’s voice whispered from within his thoughts.

“My name is Michelle, Brian’s sister… You’re funny. That’s why I like you.”

He rushed to the bathroom and sat there for three hours, evoking a side of himself he thought he’d left behind—his darker moods.

That night, he was plagued by nightmares, haunted by the devil himself, succumbing to fits of anger and profound confusion.

Yet, there was still a part of him that longed for Michelle.

A part that cared deeply for others—and for those who had cared for him.

A part that wanted to see him happy.

“You have to let go,” his world called out to him.

“Alright,” he said, taming his heart and soul as he listened.

“Maybe the new world isn’t so bad after all. Don’t you think?”

“I wish I could say the same. But it hurts…

The fact that I see Michelle every day in my dreams, yet she isn’t mine.

The worst part is—she doesn’t even recognize me.

There’s no chemistry between us anymore. Just dull moods and chronic pain.”

“You mean she embodies your suppressed pain and dark past?”

“Yes,” he replied.

“I really don’t know how to advise you on this one. Just be safe in that world.

Without me in contact with you while you sleep, it scares me.

I can’t wake you up. I can’t warn you.

There’s danger there. We might be facing a threat greater than love itself.”

“I’ll be careful. I promise,” he said.

Then added, “I think I know what to do now.”

I spent every second of my day trying to restore my world to its former shape.

After a week of meditation, hope began to fade.

It was already January 2024.

The days felt like they were closing in, and the moment was approaching—

the time to receive my matric results.

One night, on 5 January 2024, he fell asleep, letting go of all the grief and pain from his past.

He found himself in another world—one where Michelle existed, but wasn’t his.

It wasn’t the same. Tears welled up every time he saw her running away from him.

That night, he decided to approach her, drawn to the same park where he always saw her.

Michelle caught sight of him and tried to run again.

“Wait, please!” he called out.

She stopped at a distance, slowly turning to face him.

Peter remained calm as he walked toward her, surprised that she didn’t flee this time.

“I’m sorry I scared you. Trust me, I never intended to harm you in any way.”

She saw something in his eyes that eased her anxiety.

“Don’t be. Honestly, I should be the one apologizing for running away,” she said, settling onto the nearest bench.

“I’m not really good around people…”

His eyes tried to look away but couldn’t resist.

“I get you. I’m not at my best around people either.”

“Is that so?” she smiled.

“You have a beautiful smile,” he said.

“Thank you,” she replied, pulling her black hat down to hide her face.

“Hey, you don’t have to hide your face. You have no reason to feel ashamed,” he said, gently lifting her hat.

“That’s a lie,” she answered, looking at him as she tried to calm her trembling body.

“Why is that?” he asked, smiling faintly.

“I don’t know… You could be someone sent from the future to kill me.”

He laughed aloud.

“Did you spend all day thinking about that?”

“Yes. I mean, why me? There are so many people here, so many girls you could approach—but you chose me.”

Her words echoed in Peter’s mind.

“It’s not easy to tell if a tree is going to die. But if you water it, it’s up to the tree to choose whether to be resilient or to wither in the sand.

I chose you because…” he sighed, then continued,

“You’re special.”

“That’s corny. How many girls have you told they were special?”

“Only you. In this world.”

“In this world? Are you some kind of alien or something?” she asked, laughing softly.

“My name is Peter. And no—I’m just like you. Lost, broken, and afraid.”

“I hear you, Peter. I have to go home now. It’s getting really late,” she said, rising to her feet.

“Can I walk you home?” he murmured.

“Sure,” she smiled.

They walked peacefully through the trees, through the darkest places, talking and enjoying each other’s company.

Eventually, they reached Michelle’s house—a small shack, its roof supported by sheets of plastic.

“You live here?” he asked, eyes fixed on the shack, his hands tucked into his pockets against the cold.

“Yes,” she answered.

He felt a sharp pang in his heart.

Seeing Michelle live a life so different from the one he knew unsettled him.

It was hard to believe she was truly okay with it.

“Don’t worry about me. I don’t want people feeling sorry for me,” she said.

She paused… Peter wanted to respond, but something held him back.

“I think you’re a brave lady,” he said, fear flickering in his eyes.

“I just act like that. But I’m really not that brave. Anyway, I have to go. It was nice knowing you, Peter. You’re a great listener,” she said, hugging him.

He didn’t flinch. Most people wouldn’t accept her hug, given her state—but Peter never saw her as anything other than his lost, longing mate.

“Thank you,” he whispered, as he woke up in the real world.

It was 7:00 a.m.

That day, he felt overwhelmed by the thought of receiving his Grade 12 statement.

His world assured him everything would be okay, and he listened—obediently.

But the reassurance raised questions about his real-world self.

In his world, he never stressed about results. He was intelligent, though he didn’t see it—maybe not yet, but someday.

His world watched his every move in reality, worried he might drown himself in love.

The truth was out: his world didn’t trust anyone in the real world.

It lingered in his mind, hoping to return to its original physical state.

“You still believe, don’t you?” Peter murmured as he walked to the nearest store for something to eat.

“Yes,” it replied, with a sigh.

“I see. So what do you do? I mean, you’re just in my mind—what exactly do you do?” he asked, while speaking to the cashier.

“No, I won’t need a plastic,” he added.

“Well, I manage your stress levels. I help you think effectively and logically…”

It continued, until Peter interrupted.

“I understand now,” he said, exiting the shop.

After a five-minute walk to the nearest taxi rank, he climbed into a taxi, wearing a hard face mask to avoid danger and unwanted conversations.

His world resumed their earlier conversation.

“So, what are your hopes in love?” it asked.

Peter pulled out a tray of cooked chicken drumsticks.

The aroma filled the taxi, drawing glances from other passengers.

He didn’t care what they thought. He continued eating, savoring the wings that met his expectations for deliciousness.

“You know, I didn’t think I was going to enjoy this,” he said, taking another bite and describing the flavor in detail.

“Uh, Peter… are you ignoring me?”

“Sorry, what were you saying?” he asked.

“Do you have hopes of finding love in the real world?”

“Oh, that,” he replied, clearly uninterested.

“Can we shift to another topic, please?”

“No!” his world snapped, raising its tone.

Peter felt his mind weakening. He took a sip of still water to ease the tension.

“Okay, wait…” he whispered, swallowing his fear.

“It’s vulgar for you to speak to me like that. You’re not in control of me. This is my world, not yours.”

“Don’t talk to me about vulgarity. And wait—what world are you referring to right now? Because last time I checked, you lost everything that made sense to you… even yourself.

So before you open your thoughts to me, first mind them—and obey my command.

Because if you don’t, you won’t last a second in the other world.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, out of fear or paranoia.

His mind was fixed on one thought: restoring what was his.

That wouldn’t be possible unless he listened to his world.

“It’s okay,” it concluded, fading into the deepest part of his mind.

“Driver, please drop me by the shelter,” he called out, then stepped out of the taxi, gently closing the door behind him and heading toward his nearby abode.

“Here’s my baby,” said his mother, gently touching his soft cheeks.

“Hey, Mom,” he replied, heading to his room.

“So, how did it go?”

“Normal. It was okay. Nothing bad happened—we thank God.”

“Yes, we always do,” she agreed, as Peter closed his bedroom door behind him.

I sat on my bed seconds after closing the door, consumed by a fear that felt all too familiar in reality.

I speak only for myself—I tried to come to terms with the loss of Michelle.

I apologized to myself for the harsh words, for the blame I placed on my own shoulders.

I cleared my thoughts, and I knew I was destined for great things.

This time, I channeled my heart and feelings to contain my soul from drifting into my deepest dreams.

He had lost his muse for writing, trapped in the past—but he didn’t let that stop him from living.

His mind grew stronger and healthier with each passing day.

He practiced self-healing through reading the Bible, praying, and meditating.

By doing this, he let go of his Michelle and hoped to live another life—with the new, mysterious Michelle.

That same day, late at night, he drifted off in bed while watching a romance movie on his laptop.

He entered a world where he was no longer in control.

He saw Michelle near the park. Her sleepy eyes caught his presence as she walked slowly toward him.

They met halfway.

Michelle greeted him with enthusiasm. “Hey.”

“Hi,” he replied, looking into her eyes—eyes that never seemed to miss him.

“I’m sorry, I forgot your name,” she said.

“Peter. Can we take a walk?”

“Sure, Peter.”

“You look happy today. Can I ask why? Did you miss me?” he smiled at her graciously.

“Well… yes. Not that I missed you—no hard feelings though.”

“Ouch, I’m already hurt,” he joked, touching his chest in playful acknowledgment.

“So, as I was saying—Brian, my brother, got a job. Now we don’t have to worry about money.”

“Oh wow, that’s amazing. I’m so happy for him. And you—what do you do?”

“Actually, it’s been two years of sitting at home, with no clue what I want to do.

You know, before, it was all about the money.

It hurt watching my friends go to college while I couldn’t…”

She hesitated, her mood shifting as she continued.

“And my mother—she passed away, leaving us with a monster of a father. I…”

A tear escaped her eye.

Peter couldn’t bear to see her cry.

He did what most wouldn’t—he gave her hope and offered comfort.

He gently pulled her hand, allowing her to rest softly against his chest.

He didn’t mind her tears, even though they brought shame to his own eyes.

“It’s okay. I’m here,” he said, his voice just above a whisper.

“Thank you,” she replied.

She pulled her hand away and began walking slowly in silence beside him.

After a while, her tears began to fade.

“I don’t see you often. Who are you?” she asked.

“Honestly, if I told you the truth, you’d probably think I’m crazy.”

“I don’t mind. We’ve got time,” she said.

They approached a nearby bench and sat down, resuming their conversation.

“I’m living two lives—and both are complicated,” he sighed.

“How?” she asked, her eyes locked on his.

“I had a world I created—called Desires.

In that world, I did everything and was everything.

Fame and money… but I eventually realized I was living a fantasy that felt too close to reality.

Even though I had it all—the luxury, the opulence—I still felt empty.

My mother hated me because of her overwhelming fame, and my father left right after I was born.

I never felt real love. So I decided to hunt for it.

But I learned that you don’t hunt for love—it finds you.

I returned to the real world, where I wasn’t rich or famous—just a hardworking boy.

I met Vanessa, and we fell in love.

But she didn’t complete the puzzle of my life.

There was still a part of me that felt lost and afraid whenever I was with her.

We broke up due to lack of communication.

That’s when I returned to my world of Desires and found peace and resilience…

Before I knew it, I received a call from a charming, beautiful girl.

Her name was Michelle.

Not only did I learn that her brother was Brian—my best friend—but also the Prince of the world I thought I had created…”

He sighed and looked up at the sky.

“I’m so confused… what happened between you two?”

“We fell in love. It lasted for two years… and then she passed away.”

He closed his eyes and calmed his heart.

Michelle looked at him and saw the truth in his expression.

She knew he wasn’t lying.

Still, it didn’t change the way she felt about him.

To her, he was nothing more than a friend.

But she understood his pain now—why he always appeared briefly, like a shadow passing through her world.

That night, they found comfort in each other’s arms.

A quiet moment of shared warmth, even if their hearts beat to different rhythms.

“I’m so sorry for what happened to your Michelle. I’m sure she was special to you,” she said softly.

“She was,” he murmured.