IMPULSE

'Humans. We were dragged into this merciless world. We survive without knowing the answer to why we exist. We are trapped in the cycle of violence. It seems to be part of our nature. We try to escape that wretched cycle, but we are always dragged back into the chaos.

We seek for peace. What is peace? A reality or an illusion? Do we deserve it?′

Westminster, London - July 14th 2012

His heartbeat pounded out of rhythm. He breathed shakily; eyes fixed on empty space. His palms dripped with sweat; chest stacked with weight. And his feet were cold. Still, a warm sensation crept into his fingertips. A strange feeling that held so much power, erasing everything he felt before.

“Are you okay, Seth?” the girl asked, holding onto his hand.

“Why would I not be?”

“You’re so obvious.” She pouted and left his hand. “If you don’t wanna tell me, then fine.”

“It’s just the usual.” He leaned on the railing, watching the stale river. Took a deep breath. “I get ’em sometimes”.

“I’m sorry. I totally forgot.” She closed the gap between them and stood shoulder to shoulder with him, both looking into the water.

“You got nothin’ to say sorry for. We’ve known each other too long for that.” He noticed how bleak her face looked. Seth wasn’t close to an expert when it came to cheering people up. So, he laughed. Let’s be honest—it wasn’t the smartest thing to do in that situation. “Why’re you actin’ like we met yesterday, Tess?”

Tessa spun her head around fast. Let’s just say her nerves weren’t normal. But what she saw wiped away the annoyance she’d built up: his smile, pressed onto his cheeks. A rare sight she hadn’t seen in years. It felt like standing in a sunflower field in summer, the wind brushing past and tickling your skin—-that’s how calming it was for her.

“Shut up. Stop laughing.” She shoved him like a child, without any strength. Seth didn’t budge, still smiling as they both laughed like maniacs. People passing by might’ve thought these teens needed help.

After their playful moment, they progress down the pavement, following the river. They never let go of each other’s hand, holding it tight enough, walking through the dense crowd. Seth found the scenery quite touching: lights shimmering in the dark with a lively crowd surrounding them. And in the centre of it all was Tessa, leading him through.

A nostalgic scent pricked his nose. He found himself staring at a tranquil open-spaced coffee-shop up ahead. It gave off an inviting atmosphere; not claustrophobic at all. Tessa quickly noticed Seth’s interest.

“Coffee?” she asked.

“Huh? Oh, no, I’m just—”

“Let’s go! I’m paying! No excuses.” She yanked his arm without warning, making him stagger a little.

“But—-” Seth started to deny, more out of anxiety than refusal, but he felt impressed she noticed. This gave him the idea that she was constantly observing and caring for him. A sensation stabbed his heart. It wasn’t a negative feeling as anyone would think, but conflicting like hot and cold. Every time he’s been with her recently, this was the case. “Fine, let’s go,” he said.

They stepped inside and sat opposite each other. Their eyes met for a second, but Seth kept glancing away.

Why can’t I look at her? What’s fuckin’ wrong with me? he thought. Eye contact made his heart feel like it was melting.

Oh my god, why’s he looking away? Did I do something wrong? she wondered. Tessa tried thinking of a way to break the awkward tension.

She usually seemed confident and extroverted. But when it came to him, she softened like a naive kid. “I’m sorry for forcing you,” she said.

Seth hadn’t expected that. “Don’t say sorry again, Tess. I’m being real.”

This time, Tessa didn’t look bleak. She’d gathered some courage and met his eyes again. “Thought you’d like it. You used to love your mum’s coffee.”

“I told you that years ago!” Whatever he’d felt for her before amplified a thousand times. The fact that she remembered something so small floored him.

She laughed in a cheeky way. “I still remembered though.”

A figure stood next to them for a while, watching the love birds interact like it was a movie. The man seemed to enjoy the scene.

“Ahem. What would you guys like to order?” the waiter asked.

Tessa jumped slightly and looked up. “Oh, sorry! I didn’t see you.”

“It’s fine.” He smiled. “You two were entertaining to watch. Want to try the couple’s special ‘Heartfelt Latte’?”

The waiter, old enough to spot young love when he saw it, offered them a little encouragement. The couple blushed in sync, struggling to find the right words. Then came the unexpected.

“That’s cool, thanks,” Seth said.

What Tessa saw wasn’t the shy boy anymore—but a man, brimming with confidence. He usually avoided strangers, preferred to be led. This was different.

Shit! My mouth moved on its own, he thought. Even if impulsive, it was worth an applause. He spoke to a stranger.

“Give me a few minutes, sir,” the waiter said before disappearing inside.

“He really thought we were dating,” said Seth.

“To be honest, I don’t mind.” She winked.

What the hell am I doing? she thought. Both, without meaning to, had stepped out of character.

Tessa noticed the blush rising on Seth’s cheeks. Before the awkwardness kicked in, she changed the subject. “By the way, are you going back to America?”

He laughed hard, making her expression turn cautious. “Ain’t ever going back there.” He sighed. “I’ve got a reason to stay.”

“What?”

“I don’t give a shit about anyone back there. The only person I care about is sitting next to me.”

She lowered her head. “I’m glad... you’re staying here.” A cheeky smile tugged at her lips; one she tried to hide. Changing the subject had backfired, but this time, she didn’t mind.

Moments passed. The waiter returned with their drinks. Watching the two, he smiled warmly. After finishing his shift, he stepped outside and gave them one last glance like closing the final scene of a feel-good movie. With one more smile, he went on with his day.

“Tessa, I need to tell you something,” Seth said. His heart raced as he set the tone.

“Uh... what is it?”

“My chest’s been hurting for a bit... whenever I’m around you.” He gestured with his hands. “Not in a bad way... I just think...”

She gripped his hands tightly. “Just tell me.”

“I love you.”

Tessa pulled her hands away, leaning back in her chair, and turning her head. Her eyes targeted the luminous decorations by the river, as if trying to process what had just happened.

A knot twisted in Seth’s chest. “I’ll make it work. I promise you, Tess.” He leaned forward, gripping the edge of the table so tightly his knuckles turned white. “Just... give me some time. I’ll get a job, fix my issues. I’ll take care of you. I’ll make you happy—”

“Same,” she said.

“What?”

“I’m telling you I feel the same way.” She laughed gently.

“Damn. This ain’t real.” The emotional baggage he’d carried vanished as a chuckle escaped him.

Tessa reached forward and poked his cheek with a finger. “It is real,” she whispered. “A hundred percent real.”

He caught her slender fingers, kissing them softly, and lowering them, maintaining contact with her eyes. The feelings they had stored inside burst free, their hearts pounding in sync.

“We dating?” he asked.

She nodded with a smile. Her eyes sparkled. Their souls latched onto each other, drawing closer, absorbed in the moment and blind to the world around them.

This was love—beautiful like a rose, prickly like it’s thorns.

Suddenly, time slowed around them.

A thunderous noise echoed in the distance, so loud it was head-splitting. Seth’s eyes snapped toward the sound. A massive red and yellowish cloud that reached the sky, streaked with black smoke, rose from the ground. A monstrous explosion. Waves of catastrophic energy surged outward, ravaging everything in their path. In an instant, the wave reached them. Not being able to react, his eyes go black, into the darkness.

Seven years later

A bouquet of flowers lay at the base of the monument. The young man stood after placing them, his eyes drifting toward the river that was once full of life.

“Hey, Tess. I’ll be goin’ back soon,” he said.

The people queuing behind him didn’t find it odd that he spoke to himself. Everyone there shared the same black hole in their hearts. They understood.

Seth sensed something large approaching. A swarm of lifeless footsteps, their clothes soaked in darkness. Thousands of people marched across the bridge in a slow-moving swarm.

Fucking hate crowds, he thought. But the time wasn’t right for complaints. He had somewhere to be.

Moments later, the public gathered around the monument. Even the rain failed to wash away their pain. The silence was loud enough. No words were needed.

Across the street, a cameraman adjusted his gear. “It’s live!” he called out.

A reporter stood in front of the lens, gathering her composure. “We are here, live at Westminster, where the people are gathering in memory of the lives lost.” Her tone shifted. “The tragedy happened today, seven years ago, on July fourteenth, twenty-twelve.” She took a deep breath. “This was where the first bomb went off, in the mass bombing incident now known as the Blast. It permanently scarred the heart of the UK.”

The cameraman’s excitement spiked when a stir broke out on the road. “The Prime Minister!” he said, pointing toward a vehicle swarmed by police.

Media personnel suffocated the car, but the police maintained a barrier. Flashes burst through the air as cameras locked onto two figures stepping out of the car. Steadily, they advanced through the crowd.

“Mr. Johnson, please take the umbrella,” a man in a black suit walked beside the attention-stealer.

“Home Secretary, I must respectfully decline. When the crowd is drenched and in pain, why should I fear the rain? As the leader of this nation, I must show strength.”

Suddenly, his pace slowed. His gaze caught a young man weaving through the crowd. Their eyes met just for a moment and something sparked between them. A strange familiarity.

“What’s the matter, Mr. Johnson? Do you know him?”

The minister shook his head. “With all these flashing lights, it’s frustratingly hard to tell. He might be someone else.”

“Is it a problem, sir?”

“Not yet. No need to worry. Let’s go,” Johnson said, continuing toward the monument he came to honour.

On the other side, Seth narrowly escaped the crowd. He took a deep breath, attempting to calm himself, but his veins throbbed, and his fists clenched.

Feeling that way for seven years had done the damage.

The time to move on had come.