Art of Seduction

"Lyndon!" Not now, I was finally getting the date that I have been waiting for. Cora. Now there is a woman I would love to get between my sheets. "Lyndon, you need to come see this now!" I am going to kill my best friend.

Just as I was about to call her and seal the deal. Storming into the living room glaring at Charlie, but he is not looking at me. His eyes are fixated on the TV.

"This better be fucking important. You are trying to cock-block me."

"It's not me that you have to worry about bro." Turning the TV up. I wonder what the hell is so damn important. It's not like Charlie ever pays attention to the news or anything of that nature. "This affects everyone."

"Next up is the address to the nation. Where president Pierce Moore will speak more about this global emergency." I snorted a laugh. What a joke, he just loves to hear his voice more than he loves being in the spotlight.

"Dude, this sounds serious."

"Charlie, this guy is nothing but a camera whore who over exaggerates everything, just to make sure he looks better. Then all of a sudden, he has the solution to all problems. Our savior, our hero. Fucking bullshit!"

"I don't know, it's on every damn channel, even the porn channels!"

"Not the porn channels!" Feigning shock, he shoves me as I laugh.

"You're a real dick. I don't know why I put up with you."

"Because you love me and I make your life more meaningful."

"Shut up, it's on."

Rolling my eyes, I want to retort but Charlie is nervous and I hate when his anxiety kicks in. Some days it is so bad that he will not come out of his room for days.

"My fellow Americans." Rolling my eyes yet again, because even his voice irks me. "Our nation is in a crisis. Not just our nation but this epidemic is global."

"Here comes the dramatics."

"Lyndon!" Do not whine at me, you know I hate that!

"Leaders around the world have gathered together because of concern of the over population of the world."

"That's what protection is for, dumb ass!"

"You know damn well that doesn't always work." Glaring at me, I shut up. There was that one scare where I thought I was going to be a dad, but thankfully it was a false alarm.

"I wore protection, and she said she was on the pill!"

"You know that shit is not bulletproof."

"Yeah, yeah." Waving him off and paying attention to the idiot on the screen. Any other time, I would respect who is in charge of our nation, but he has not done a damn thing to improve our living. The crime rate is up, We have more homeless people now than when he came into office. I just don't like the guy, something about him seems... off.

"At this rate, there will not be any place left on this Earth to enjoy our forest and wildlife because it is going to be overrun by too many people."

"What a crock of shit!"

"So, we have put our differences aside and come up with a conclusion. All sex will be banned. Any one who goes against this ban will be punishable by law."

"What the actual fuck?!" Charlie and I look at each other before looking back at the screen. "There is no way this can come to light. What is he going to do monitor every fucking person on the planet?"

The reporters are going crazy with questions. "What if it does happen?"

"Then we are truly fucked!" This can't be happening.

It only took two months to implement the ban. Riots spread throughout the world, outraged that something that came natural to us was being taken away. I thought it was bullshit, but when I saw a couple shot out in public for being caught in the act, it became too real.

"Now they get to monitor our every move with this!" Waving my wrist the damn bracelet dangles. If you take it off you can be thrown in jail or worse. "This is no way to fucking live, Charlie."

"Not all of us are sex addicts like you."

"I'm not a sex addict! I love sex like any other person out there."

"Not all people are like that." Well they don't know what they are missing. "Besides there is a way, you know the rules."

"Fuck the rules!" Looking down at my bracelet. "Fuck. Your. Rules!"

"Lyndon. Do you have a death wish?" Smacking my hand away from the bracelet. "I can't lose my best friend because he wants to think with his dick instead of his other brain. By the way, you really need to start using that brain more."

"Ha ha. You're very funny." I'm just going crazy, I haven't been able to feel a woman's touch in two months!

"You know what you would have to do if you want to have sex again."

"I'm not going to get the permit. To hell with getting a vasectomy or any other shit they might put you through for that." I heard rumors that they do tests along with getting your balls snipped. "There is something really shady about this whole damn thing."

"Shady or not this is now our life." I don't know how he can be so calm about it. "Or you can get a job at one of the businesses that you are aloud to have sex." The BDSM world, no thank you. Then there are the LGBTQ clubs because they will not be re-procreating because a woman and a woman cannot get each other pregnant, same thing with a man with another man. Lucky bastards! That is just not something for me though. Then there are the big hot shots that can pay for whatever the hell they want and get away with it. Charge an arm and a leg to even belong to their clubs.

This world is fucked!

"It could take years to get into the only legitimate jobs that I could get into. I applied for the Art of Seduction gallery, and there is already a six month to a year waiting list."

"Then I guess you are going to be enjoying your hand for a lot longer." Laughing I shove him away from me. Why is he my best friend again? "Just think of it this way, you will get some muscles in those skinny arms of yours." Fuck you! Not everyone is built like a damn tank. Slinging his arm across my shoulder and ruffling my hair. I hate when he does that. "Welcome to a new world, Lyndon."

I fucking hate it!