The Last Wish

“Don’t worry—the guard is deep asleep by now. Besides, I have a surprise for you. Something you’ve wanted us to try for a long time... but I wanted it to be unforgettable.”

He pulled me close by the waist, whispering against my lips—the ones I ached for him to kiss—so we could melt into each other and forget, even just for a moment, the shadows that haunt our souls again and again...But that moment never came.

I hoped it was what my mind had dared to imagine. But with him, I could never be certain what came next. So I just let him take my hand and lead me toward the tall stairs.

“Are you sure we can go through the front at this hour?”I asked, trying not to trip on the stairs, which were steep as hell and way too high.

“We can, but keep your mouth shut, otherwise we’ll be heard and get into even more trouble!” He pressed his index finger to his lips — a very suggestive and very mature gesture, if you ask me.

But honestly, we already had enough. We both had criminal records; I, at least, had two full pages of shit I’d done before we were even together. What we were doing now seemed like the easiest thing I’d done so far: breaking into one of the city’s museums — or whatever the hell it was.

Andrew started adding more stuff to his record after he got together with me. You could say I’m a really bad influence on him—but honestly, I don’t even care, as long as he likes it. Like any misunderstood teenager abandoned by his parents, he’s looking for an escape from this messed-up world full of problems and crappy people—and I was more than happy to help.His empty eyes pulled me in from the first moment. I knew he was the same as me: an orphan, left behind and forced to figure things out on his own.

Like snapping out of a trance, I realized I was standing in front of a huge wooden door, hidden behind a bunch of vines. I don’t even know the name of the plant, but I’m pretty sure they let it grow wild on purpose—just to give the castle some kind of vibe. Honestly, I didn’t even notice when we got inside or when we reached the garden that stretched out in front of us. Okay, I couldn’t really see much—it was already past midnight—but a few streetlamps lit up the area a little, and the moonlight helped too.

The castle wasn’t abandoned, and it wasn’t far from the city either—it was right in the middle of a middle-class neighborhood.It wasn’t some shady area like the one Andrew and I came from, but it wasn’t exactly a rich, well-guarded district full of carefree people either.

“I want us to get high here!” His words snapped me out of analyzing the area and made me smile.

That’s what I was waiting for!

“I’ve got something new, and I want us to try it together—right here, in a place we’re not even supposed to be!” His excitement was contagious, and the moment he pressed his lips to my neck, I knew for sure—there was nothing in the world that could make me say no to him.

“What?” Overwhelmed by the heat burning through me and the excitement that made my fingers restless, I let myself fall into his arms, ready to give him whatever was left of me.

“PCP.” The whisper—and the sound of his jacket zipper—made me wait, eager for the moment when the warmth of the drug would flood through me.

“Why here?” My question came out more like a moan as he licked my neck, but I was still curious why it had to be in this shitty old castle—where we could get caught any second by some fat, tired security guard whose beauty sleep we were about to ruin.

“So you can feel like a princess in this castle. So you can feel like my princess.”I felt the words on my neck, and when he pulled away and held the little packet up in front of my face, my mouth started to water.

I knew what PCP was, but I still didn’t understand how he managed to get his hands on it.We’d wanted to try it for a long time, but it was expensive and hard to find. I wanted so badly to feel its effect on me—to feel my mind leave my body, to be carried away by hallucinations, to be overtaken by a sense of power... I wanted it with everything in me, and nothing was going to stop me from going all the way tonight.

We sat down together on the grass—me between his legs, his arms wrapped around me.Those arms were perfect for holding someone like that.

He opened the packet and poured a bit of the white powder onto his hand. It looked a lot like powdered sugar.I didn’t hesitate for a second when he brought his hand close to my face—I snorted all of it.

“I gave you a little more,”he said, “because you’re already hooked on a few drugs, and it might’ve built up your tolerance."

I’d already been hooked for a few years—heroin, sometimes cocaine, and weed.I’ve tried almost everything, but those are my favorites.Especially heroin.

I love the heat that rushes through me when I take a hit—when that wave hits like an orgasm and lets me float inside my own body.The best thing about heroin is how it makes you forget everything. That warm feeling takes over, and all your problems just disappear.Everything fades away, and all that’s left is the pleasure.

“I love you.” My words caught his attention for a second, but he drifted off again as he lined up another bump on his hand.

“Love you too,”he said, smiling, then snorted a smaller line.

He hadn’t been addicted for long—actually, he wasn’t addicted at all—but he liked trying the things I did. He liked it, that I knew for sure. Maybe he liked it even more than the sex we had, just to make a comparison.

It helped him escape, just like it helped me. It helped him forget about his parents’ divorce, and he found warmth in the arms of drugs, just like I did. His blue eyes caught me again, and his kiss made me tremble—that same warmth returning, this time between my legs.

I could already feel the dose of energy waking my body up, and curiosity made me get up from his arms and look at the starry sky, standing on my feet.

I’m a very curious person; people have always told me that this curiosity would get me into trouble—and that’s exactly what happened. But I don’t complain, as long as it gets satisfied.

“Wanna see what this castle is hiding?” I smiled and moved fast the moment his eyes shot me thatdon’t you darelook—but I ignored it and kept going, fully convinced I’d be getting a few slaps on the ass later as punishment. Maybe even a night or two back in my favorite cell at the police station.

I could feel the adrenaline starting to flood my body, and curiosity pushed me to go alone toward the doors behind us. I only heard a whisper when I stepped inside, and I quickly shut the door behind me. It was big—that much I could tell. I knew Andrew would come after me and pull me back out to look at the stars again, but I wanted to explore, to see the secrets this castle was hiding.

I went through another door and ended up in front of a tall room with a fireplace and some massive stairs. My feet started to tingle as I stepped forward, ready to discover something new.

After climbing the long stairs, I reached a balcony surrounded by stained-glass windows.I stared at each of them for a few seconds. They looked like portals: The one on the left looked like the gates of Heaven—beautiful shades of yellow, orange, and green filled it, and it gave off so much warmth that I felt like touching it, just to see if it was as welcoming as it looked.

I turned my eyes to the one on the right—the darkest one—made of shades of black and gray, with emerald green bars painted across it, like they were holding back the fires of Hell.Everything was so beautiful, but the window in the center couldn’t be compared to the others. It was the largest and the most breathtaking of them all.

A woman—she looked like an angel—was holding what seemed to be flowers: a blend of the two side windows. But she didn’t express anything.

It was just a combination—you couldn’t tell where you’d end up if you passed through it, left or right—only your soul would know. The woman was reaching out, asking you to take her hand, to pass through the big window and fall into her arms—to feel a love so warm and welcoming that you’d forget about your problems and the world outside.

She reached out her hand to me, whispering for me to join her.And the crazy part of me actually reached back, hoping she’d grab me and pull me out of this hell called life. Too late, I realized what I had done—when I touched the cold glass and saw that it was just a painting, something that couldn’t move, I knew it had been a moment of madness. So I let it go and continued exploring.

This time, I climbed the stairs all the way to the top and got a look at the stained-glass windows from above—but they didn’t catch my eye the way they did before. I turned around and ended up in a room full of doors—basically a hallway, but way too big to feel like one.

I stepped through one of the doors and found a giant room with a massive table and dark red chairs. But I wasn’t that interested, not enough to go in, so I closed the heavy door and kept moving.

I was still hoping to find something actually exciting—stained glass and meeting rooms weren’t cutting it. That had already gotten old. I kept wandering, completely turned around, with no idea where the hell I was or how to get back to Andrew. Once in a while, I stopped to look at a painting. I couldn’t say what they were supposed to mean, but they were strange in a way that made you want to keep staring.

The farther I went, the more uneasy I felt. My chest was tight, and I could feel my breathing pick up. I didn’t want to panic, but the thought of going back started to sound better by the second. The rooms started to spin. The things in the paintings looked like they were moving—stepping out, getting closer. Like they wanted to pull me in.

I ran. Room to room, deeper into this place that suddenly felt cursed.

I definitely didn’t feel like a princess. More like something being hunted—like I was in the middle of someone’s game, and I didn’t want to know the rules. That feeling of being watched settled deep in my gut. My hands were trembling, light and useless.