THE PARADOX

Everything turned dark ,when I saw her motionless, her eyes closed forever and her velvet hands stopped moving. It was an apocalyptic day for me but indeed left me alone.

Feb,2005, I am just a man with no responsibilities. I am between the jobs, infact, causing me stress. The only thing I want is living and societal reputation. Still bewildered, sitting in home, dreaming of fulfilling my desires. Thinking these before I heard the clink of my alarm clock, reminding me to go to an interview. I picked up my accessories and took the taxi way to the building. By entering it, I got hit by the fact that I am not worthy for it but still pleased myself of doing which was conflicting my mind. And yes, as anticipated, they told me to find a better job. Well when I was leaving the building, a new phase of my life began, got hit by a young and pretty lady, my CV fell into the floor just like my enthusiasm after putting my first step here. She picked it up and handed it over to me. Said a “Thank you” and heard a question.

“They rejected you, right?”

That smile was really mesmerizing.

“Yeah, I think I simply don’t belong to be here”

She answered with a laughter.

“Ooh, well same here but according to me my interview was holy crap”

“Well Hii, I am Ana”

“Jasper, Nice to meet ya”

“You seen to be a man with expertise then why are you here for just a handful amount of money?”

“Cuz I am not what you think I am”

“So we are the same or maybe it’s your luck which isn’t going around with you”

“Luck is just a word, only we are responsible for what we do, so it’s my karma”

“Wow, you are so thoughtful and your words have really struck my heart. Anyways thank you so much”

“De Nada"

This conversation didn’t last for more than 2 mins before I left the building and went back to my residence. I never hoped for my second meeting with her but maybe it’s my destiny that we met right after bout a week in a metro. Again her chatterbox began.

“Hey Jasper, nice to meet you again”

“Oh yeah I think so, Ana”

“Well you know? I got my placement in 40 Bank Street”

“That’s great, finally you got what you deserved”

“Hey, did you get any?”

“Well I am still working on it”

“Ooh okay, I am sure you will get what you are dreaming of”

“Only God knows what I am dreaming of”

She laughed with a sweet message.

“You are definitely gonna get what you deserve. Just be positive and believe on the almighty”

“Okay this is my station right here, I gotta go, Adios”

“Adios” with a shine on her teeth.

I left the metro but with a feeling of pleasure. This time our meeting didn’t make feel like the last time. I got a taxi to drive me back to my home. While inside the taxi, my mind was filled with the thoughts of that lady.

“She is pretty”

“Maybe she is very talented and sure she is kind”

And without any notice, I reached home. That girl is stuck in my head now. I just can’t help myself now but think about her. And with this, I laid on my bed, then sun rose, I got up, and went to search for job again. And while I was waiting my way to metro, I thought of Ana, “God I still remember her name”.

She was not there today. I reached my destination and about to enter, I got a phone call saying that I got a placement in 40 Bank Street. At first I thought it would be a scam but as a despairing person, I trusted it.

When entered, the entire staff welcomed me with bouquets and wishes. With a big smile I thanked them all but got shocked as I saw Ana.

“Ana?”

“Congratulations Jasper, finally you have made through it”

“You work here?”

“Yeah, I had already told you that before, must’ve forgotten. Anyways, come with me fresher”

She showed me my office and helped me with doing registration.

“This is where you will work”

“Anything else you need? Mr. Jasper!”

“No, hmm…”

“Okay, you’re good to go then”

“Hey Ana!”

“Yes”

“Thank you”

She smiled back and gave me a small chit and went back.

I opened it

‘Evening 7:30, Cuppa cloud cafe’

Without no further information, it’s just an one line message. An address, clueless about why she gave me this. But as I am grateful to her, I obeyed as she instructed.

After I landed on the café, I found Ana sitting with a reserved table. With a wave and smile in her face, she called me to sit next to her. When the waiter requested for order, Ana ordered 2 cups of cold coffee.

And with this our chit chat began

“Ana, I know you helped me but I wanna know why?”

“Well I always thought I can ever do nothing but you appeared as an angel to me”

“Mmm.. cuz you are a good man and whoever is kind I help them”

“But why?”

“Well there are few of them and I wanna save those few cuz those give me a sense of happiness”

“Ooh great thought

so I am kind

Wow I didn’t know this either”

“Yes you are!! And you know what?”

“What?”

“It wasn’t hard for me to get you into this company”

“How so?”

“Cuz I am Your Manager” (with a smile)

“Whattttt???” (astonished)

“Yes I am you manager you jerk and I helped you cuz I saw a very good person in your, not because I do that often but you are different from others.

You are a great man!

As I saw you struggling for a penny, I gave you a chance to earn millions”

“Millions?

Do employees get millions? I thought they get thousands but that’s enough for me”

“Ooh… we leave it”

And the waiter placed coffee on our table

“Enjoy your coffee, Jas”

“Ooh yeah (takes a sip) Well Ana, I don’t even know how I can thank you”

“No need

Just work hard to flourish our business”

“Oh yeah, I am devoted

Well, thank you so much Ana”

“De nada”

With this a few days passed and I got better in business. My hands were running swiftly and my mind was filled with green.

With this I heard of Alex calling me, an employee sitting next to me.

“Hey dude! You are fire”

“I make fire”

“You are really flourishing and doing a great job”

“Hey! How you get in here?, in this company?”

“Well I cleared the interview”

“Ooh”

Then why Ana gave me this job by herself? Well only she can answer me this but she confuses me too. That day went too long cuz I had to work a lot for which everyone admired me even the boss became pleased.

After a few days, I was working late, I thought no one was there but Ana appeared

“Ana, what are you doing here?”

“Well what are you doing here?”

“I am working”

“Well I am too”

“But now I’m done”

“Same here

So wanna walk home?”

I walked along with her, looking at the stars together.

“Well I am curious bout something Jas, what’s your type?”

“Henn….

Well I think someone kind like you I guess” (blushed)

“So you like girls like me, I guess

But I wanted to tell you this but I am shy maybe”

“What?”

“Well I..

I..

I hope that you stay happy throughout your life”

“Hhhh… well same to you”

“Okay I reached my home, Adios, see you later”

“Adios”

I drove to my home too, alone but physically not mentally cuz she was in my mind. And that was the night when I felt something that I had never felt before, that struck my heart with an immense pleasure, which made me admire the beauty of the dark sky, which made me feel like I am not alone anymore.

To be honest, that was the night when I fell in love with her…

After a few days, it was dated 21st October, the day she was born, and I finally made myself to confess my love to her. I even practiced how should I confess.

“Well Ana, You are pretty and I love you”

It’s crap

“Ana, You are a good man, I am a good woman

Sorry,

You are a good woman, I am a good man”

Aaaahhhh …

“Ana, I can think about anyone else but not you”

“Ooh God why is this so hard?????” (frustrated)

Well somehow, I drove my car with a bouquet of flower, a chocolate, wearing her favourite colour shirt with a special ring for her. But I was scared if she would reject me and even slap me. Anyways with this conflicts in my mind, I showed courage to drive my way to her home.

In the mid-way of the road, there was some crowd with a bunch of cops investigating something. At first I thought of going away but still I got out of my car and went there.

“What happened?”

“Well someone died so police are investigating”

Then I made my way to the corpse and when I saw that my soul left my body. My hands trembled, and I could think nothing.

It was Ana, who was lying dead over there, and I was crying as she was doing nothing but just lying with eyes closed.

“Ana!!!! Wake up

You can’t leave me, Ann

Wake up!!!

Why you aren’t moving?

What happened???

Annnn….”

(Crying)

“Why god? Why??”

“Ana please open you eyes”

“Ann don’t leave me alone

Please” (sobbing)

“I Love you”

The world seemed a void for me. From the grief of her death, I doubted my existence.

When her body was taken for autopsy, I pleaded them not to do so.

“Please sir, don’t do it

Don’t hurt her

The sharp knives will cut her soft skin and she will cry out of the pain”

“Are you mad? She’s already dead then how can she feel the pain?”

And they denied me and took her with them and I was requested to go to police department for inquiry. The inspector told me that she was murdered. She had a bullet in her stomach which eventually killed her. And no other evidence were there with them.

When I heard that, my grief turned to a different emotion, my blood boiled and my body raged.

“I’ll kill the murderer”

“I’ll kill him!!!!!”

No other reports were found in her post-mortem report so the next day they took her to the cemetery. Everyone was sad, but I was in grief as well as in anger. When everyone went away, there was only one man standing over there, looking at her grave, that was me.

“Hey Ann, I hope you are listening

Well I am sorry that I was not there for you, but I promise that culprit will die!”

I left a flower on her grave and was about to go back home but suddenly I realised that someone else was there. When I saw him, I couldn’t see his face but he started running, I shouted him to get back to me but he didn’t stop, but accidently he tripped over and I caught him.

“Who are you sir?”

And when I took off his hat, I was amazed. I couldn’t believe myself.

“You look like me”