Chapter 1: Roommate Drama (Again)
I woke up out of a dead sleep to find my walls shaking.
I started to panic, then realized there was a certain rhythmic intensity to this earthquake and blushed instead. The sound effects were a dead giveaway, too.
"Oh my God... oh my God... oh my God..."
The shaking intensified and I wished I could just die, right now, before I heard anything else. No more creaking. No more thudding. No more...
"Oh...Oh...Oh...Oh.MY.GOOOOOOOOODDDDDD!!!" The walls shook with a sudden thundering vibration before stillness descended on the house, broken only by the sound of what was probably an ass being slapped and a low male voice going, "That's right, girl. I'm your god tonight."
He sounded pleased with himself, the floorboards creaking as he moved away from the bed and padded toward the bathroom. The old wooden floorboards in our shitty rental tracked his every move, just like the thin plaster walls amplified every rock, roll, and bang happening on the beds.
Well, on Della's bed, anyway. My side of the wall was generally quieter.
Okay, it was always quieter.
Della had a boyfriend. And a parade of "friends with benefits" that trooped through when her boyfriend was out of town.
Mostly, I ignored it. What else could I do? When I'd come to look at the room, she'd told me her boyfriend slept over sometimes, and I'd said that was fine. What I cared about was cheap rent on the bus line and being close to work. I'd thought -- silly me -- that I'd be spending most of my waking hours over at Trent's anyway.
Ugh, stupid Trent. Stupid, stupid, stupid Trent. I rolled over. I did not want to think about my ex right now, not with the smell of ill-advised sex lingering in the air. The last thing I needed to be was more frustrated in confusing ways.
Nope. Nope, nope, nope. It was -- I checked the clock -- 1:30 in the morning on a Thursday night, and I had work in the morning, bright and early. If I was lucky, Jason, Della's boyfriend, would be able to give me a ride in so I could skip the bus.
Oh shit.
Jason.
That hadn't been Jason next door.
But Jason usually took me to work on Friday mornings.
Which meant...
I grabbed my phone and quickly fired off a text. Della, did Jason's flight get delayed?
I heard the ping through the walls as the text hit her phone. Heard the rustle of covers and clothes as she sorted through her love den to find it.
Nah. He'll get home late on Thursday night, like always.
So, like, any minute?
Girl, don't freak me out. It's Wednesday.
I stared at my phone, waiting for the penny to drop on the other side of the wall. 5. 4. 3. 2... Okay, Della's brains were probably a little scrambled still from Mr. Oh.My.God.
Della it's Thursday night NOW.
There was a long, pregnant pause after the ping of the text. Then I heard Della's feet scrambling across the floorboards, racing for the bathroom. She banged on the door three times, hard.
"Hey! You have to get out of here now. My boyfriend will be home any minute!"
"Mmphhff... what?" came from the shower.
"My boyfriend! He'll be home any minute! You've got to get out!" Della shouted.
"What the fuck?" Mr. Oh.My.God. suddenly didn't sound so confidently god-like anymore. I heard the water turn off and the curtain push back. "Who is coming home?"
"Oh my sweet Jesus Lord Christ," Della snapped. "Get your ass dressed and out of here now."
"Hey," he started, "that's no way to treat a nice guy. I was just..."
But we all heard the crunch of the car's wheels on the gravel drive, and suddenly there was a lot of movement across the floorboards. My door flew open and there was Della, one arm loaded with a bundle of bedding and clothes and the other dragging one very damp man behind her. He was wide-eyed, clinging to an undersized bath towel for dear life, and utterly unprepared to be shoved full-force into my little room, bedding and clothes flying after him.
"You've got to help me, Allison. If anyone asks, Tom's your date. Make it look convincing." She slammed the door back shut before I could argue, leaving me staring, open-mouthed, at Tom.
In the chaos, he'd lost his towel.
