Can't Get Over You

Prologue TWELVE YEARS AGO When Finlay O’Neill lifted the pile of laundry off the floor, something hairy brushed against her wrist. It was bristly. It was big. And it was alive. With a shriek, she dropped the clothing, and out scurried a baby raccoon. Fear ripped through her, making her hair stand on end. She bolted out of the apartment, only realizing she didn’t have her phone when she ran down the flight of stairs. And since she could never go back inside as long as she lived, she couldn’t call anyone for help. Her heart thundered, and the ice-cold air burned the back of her throat. The moment she hit the sidewalk, she collided with a large, hard body. “Oh my God. I’m so sorry.” Flustered and sweating, she locked eyes with the guy. No. Not him. Of all the people in the entire town, why did it have to be Jude McKenna? “Fee?” Concern tightened the skin around his eyes. Any other time, she’d be thrilled to see him. But not when she was wearing fuzzy brown moose slippers, gym shorts, and her dad’s Golf Pro sweatshirt. And no bra. Her arms crossed over her chest, and she wanted a sinkhole to open under her feet and swallow her up. “What’s wrong?” The two words shot out of his mouth, clipped and urgent. She couldn’t think, let alone speak. Not when her feet were tucked into the belly of a stuffed moose, the antlers sticking out and bobbing when she moved. But as much as she didn’t want to see him looking like this, she needed help. “Jude, I⁠—” Her jaw snapped shut when she noticed his companion. Leia Collins. Her former best friend. The sting of betrayal traveled through her body as fast as a bullet. No. She bolted. As she hurried off, snowmelt dampened the bottom of her slippers. She wished she had her phone. Then again, who could she call? Her parents were working. Neither could take time off to rescue her from a freaking raccoon. Her best friend would drop everything and come running. She knew that, for sure. But Willa was at the salon, getting ready for prom. No way would Finlay bother her for something so silly. Boots hitting pavement caught up with her. “Hey,” Jude called. “What the hell’s going on?” Unable to even look at him, she waved him away. “Nothing. I’m fine.” But he reached for her arm and turned her to face him. God. It happened every time she saw him. Every single time. He was just so big, so handsome, so…dark and brooding and sexy. With his shoulder-length, dark, glossy hair and bold tribal ink, he was the biggest, baddest, biker boy in town. Girls chased him, and boys secretly wanted to be him. He was her obsession. Her crush. And her deepest source of heartache. Because even though they talked outside of school, he ignored her when they were in it. He might flip through girls like a deck of cards, but he’d made it clear he had zero interest in her. At that moment, Leia caught up with them. No matter how much Finlay needed Jude’s help, she’d rather keep walking in her slippers till she hit the California coast than ever acknowledge her former friend again. She wrenched her arm out of his grip and spun around. “Dammit, Fee.” Jude kept up with her. “Tell me what happened.” The concern in his voice brought her to a stop. He studied her eyes. “Come on,” Leia said. “It’s cold. I want to go home.” “Go without me.” Jude never once pulled his gaze away from Finlay. “I thought we were hanging out?” Leia asked in a nasty tone, but when he ignored her, she stomped off. “Screw you, Jude. You’re such a jerk.” “Now, talk to me,” Jude said in a softer tone. “What’s going on?” His dark hair brushed the tops of his broad shoulders and framed a strong jaw and high cheekbones. Those startling green eyes burned with concern. How could she not be obsessed with a guy who looked at her like she was the most important thing in the world? “It’s stupid.” “Tell me anyway.” She had nowhere to go, and she needed help. What choice did she have but to make a fool of herself? “There’s a raccoon in my bedroom. And I can’t…I can’t go back there. And I forgot my phone. Not that my mom could come get me. But I’m just freaking out⁠—” “Is the apartment unlocked?” Warmth spread through her, and she nodded. Because he was going to help her. “Come on. Show me where you live.” “Oh no.” She shook her head. “Absolutely not. I’m sorry, but I can’t go in there.” “You’ll wait outside.” Even as she said, “You don’t have to do that,” she was on the move, heading back to the employee housing complex. Every step ramped up her anxiety, and she climbed the stairs as if heading into a burning fire. At the landing, she stopped and pointed at her mom’s unit. It was the only one with an open door. “That one.” With a curt nod, he strode off and disappeared inside. It’s kind of crazy, right? That Jude’s going on a search-and-rescue raccoon mission for me? Usually, she didn’t waste time thinking about Leia or wishing bad things would happen to her, but watching Jude shut her down so coldly had somehow managed to heal the nick in her heart. When he finally trampled down the stairs, he held a shoebox. He moved right past her, crossed the street, and disappeared into the woods. Relief loosened her anxiety, and she broke into a huge smile. She hadn’t expected to run into anyone from her class today, since it was prom, but for Jude to sweep in and save her? It just made her so happy. When he emerged from the thick grove of trees, he dumped the box into a garbage bin and headed back to her. “Thank you⁠—” But he brushed past her and loped up the stairs. Surprised, she followed him into her apartment. “Do you think there are more?” Her skin prickled, and she couldn’t help scanning the room. “Is the mother living in my apartment? Raising her entire litter in my room?” “I didn’t see any others, so I don’t think so.” He swiped a bath towel off the floor and headed straight for the kitchen. “Where’d you find it?” “Under the dresser.” He dropped it into the washing machine and fiddled with the dials. A moment later, water rushed through the pipes. “You didn’t have to do that. You’ve done more than enough.” “I used it to catch the raccoon. I didn’t think you’d want to touch it.” This guy. She wanted to throw herself against that big, broad chest and feel the shield of his powerful body. She wanted his big, strong arms to squeeze out all the loneliness. Instead, she said, “You’re right. I would’ve burned it.” She smiled. “Thank you. I really appreciate it. I know it seems ridiculous, but it was a raccoon.’” “That motherfucker went Cujo on me.” He washed his hands at the sink. Other than Willa, she wasn’t used to having people over, so with his size, Jude took up all the space in her small kitchen. It was thrilling, and she loved it. Loved him. Wanted him with her whole being “So what’s your beef with Leia?” he asked. The question hit like a hard slap across her cheek. Why had she assumed he’d chosen her over the most popular girl in school? He might still be planning to catch up with her. “Uh, I was on the run from a wild animal in my slippers. I wasn’t exactly in the mood to socialize.” “Nah. You’re the nicest girl in town. You’ve never been rude to anyone.” Was that affection in his eyes? For me? “Yeah, well.” She didn’t want to share her ugly past. She especially didn’t want Leia to come out looking powerful. But at the same time, she wasn’t going to shy away from the truth. “We were best friends until sixth grade.” “And then?” “And then, she dumped me.” And before he could think she was a loser, she added, “Because I’m not rich like her.” “What does money have to do with friendship?” Coming from a guy who used to live in a bike club, the question surprised her. As if he hadn’t experienced it, too. “You think she wants to have playdates in employee housing?” But she could tell he still didn’t get it. “While her family was in Paris for spring break, I was teaching kids on the bunny slope at the ski club.” “Maybe she was jealous of you.” “Of me? Ha.” Well, honestly, she loved that his mind went there. But no, he didn’t get it. “Trust me, it’s the money. Her parents live in a fancy house, and her mom stays home. Mine are divorced and work full-time. That meant all the playdates could only be at her house. And when her mom took us back-to-school shopping, it wasn’t like I could afford anything. It was all very one-sided. Whatever.” She shrugged it off. It was a long time ago. “She dropped me.” “How’d she do it?” “She was mean, okay? Why’re you pushing this?” “If she treated you like shit, I want to know.” A burst of pleasure had her fingers and toes tingling. She loved that he cared. “There were four of us in the group, and one of the girls was having a birthday party. It seemed like every year, the events got bigger and more outrageous, as if they were all trying to outdo one another. And for this one, her parents rented out the Owl Hoot amphitheater and hired a semi-famous band. They had food trucks and fireworks. It sounded like so much fun, and I couldn’t wait to go. But when I showed up at Leia’s house, there was no one home. She’d left a letter for me taped on the door.” “What did it say?” The skin around his eyes crinkled with concern. “Basically, that she didn’t want to be friends with me.” “Fee. What did it say? I know you still remember every word.” “Why do you care?” She was a little too heated, too emotional, and she didn’t want him to see her as some pathetic loser. “Because I do. Now, spit it out.” “Fine. It said, ‘Finlay, you can’t be our friend anymore. And don’t give us your stupid puppy-dog eyes. It won’t work.’” She could’ve sworn his features hardened, but she was probably reading into it, looking for the support she wanted. Because, in reality, he didn’t say a word. He just stood there, giving her no emotion whatsoever. Her heart seized up. But she had to shake it off. He didn’t have to join her in hating Leia Collins. “Well, thank you for catching the raccoon. I still won’t sleep tonight, but it’s better than running away from home when I’m so close to graduating.” She smiled, hoping he’d get the humor. He didn’t. “No problem.” As he headed for the door, her pulse rioted. Because he was leaving. And it struck her that, in a matter of weeks, school would end. All the moments she lived for—waiting for him to saunter into Algebra or pass her in the hallway on his way to gym—would be gone. Over. Forever. This obsession had filled her every waking hour, kept her company, and let her escape into a world of fantasy. And not once in all these years had she let him know how she felt. She’d never asked him to go for a hike or get a smoothie. Nothing. Did she really want to wonder if something could’ve happened between them if she’d only had the courage to ask him out? The moment his hand closed over the doorknob, she blurted out, “Do you want to go to prom with me?” He shot a look over his shoulder. “Prom?” Shame burned a path from deep in her gut all the way up to her earlobes. He’d spat the word out as if she’d asked him to play Barbies. He might’ve been a senior at Calamity Falls High School, but he was nothing like the other kids. He didn’t go to football games or dances. He cruised on the outer edges. “What happened?” he asked. “Your date bail on you?” It was a fair question. The dance was in a few hours, after all. But she shook her head. “I don’t have one.” “Why not?” He seemed truly confused, which, she supposed, was flattering. “No one asked me.” It drove it home, though, how different their experiences were. She wasn’t a nerd or an outcast or anything like that. She was friendly with a bunch of different people, but she didn’t have a group of her own. And she’d never had a boyfriend. Because she’d only ever wanted him. He grew thoughtful. “I saw your vision board.” Oh God. She wanted the floor to give way so she could go crashing to the bottom of the earth. She’d been so worked up over the raccoon, she hadn’t considered that Jude McKenna had been in her bedroom. What else had he seen? Her bras. Her underwear? Oh, please. Not the journal. She’d for sure left it out. She knew that because she’d been writing in it. Had he noticed his name scrawled all over it? Drowning in mortification, her chest squeezed tightly. She could barely take a full breath. “I’m not that guy,” he said. “What guy?” Her voice came out as a hoarse whisper. “The guy who wants to live on Bloom Lane and do block parties and shit. Can you imagine me coming home from work, roaring up the street on my Harley? The moms, in their designer jeans, would snatch up their kids and get them inside their houses, pulling the curtains shut. Me, mowing a fuckin’ lawn? Yeah, that’s not gonna happen.” She didn’t like that he’d seen right down to her most tender core, but at the same time, his assumption pissed her off. “I’m not asking you to marry me, Jude. It’s a dance.” “You got your whole life planned out,” he said with a hint of accusation. “What’s wrong with that? People with goals wind up more successful in life.” “Nothing wrong. I just don’t know why you’re asking me now, when school’s almost over, and we’re going in very different directions.” He shrugged. “You want to be a teacher, have kids, live on Bloom Lane.” He made it sound like it was the most boring life in the world, but she wouldn’t apologize for the future she longed for. “And you want to go ride free—or whatever the club motto is. Cool. But I love it here. Calamity’s the most beautiful place in the world, and it has literally everything.” Including you. For now, anyway, it has you. “And yet, no one asked you to prom. And other than Willa, you don’t have many friends.” He’d plunged a blade into her heart. “God, Jude.” “No, I don’t mean it like that.” “Well, how did you mean it? Because I just told you what happened in sixth grade. It was literally the worst thing I’ve gone through in my entire life, and I’m sorry, but it’s not easy to trust people after something like that.” She let out a huff of exasperation. “It’s not like I don’t want to have friends.” “No, I get it. I’m just saying… Forget it.” He opened the door. “No, you don’t get to leave me hanging like that. What do you mean?” But he’d already walked out. What just happened? How had it all gone so wrong? She stood there, reeling, wishing she’d kept her mouth shut about Leia. Worse, why had she asked him to prom? He’d seen her vision board and knew what she wanted out of life. Leia probably wanted to become an ambassador. Travel the world. No doubt, she’d become someone important, live an international life filled with State dinners and yacht parties hosted by celebrities. And as interesting as that might sound, it left Finlay flat. She didn’t want any of it. A lot of things embarrassed her—and trust me, asking Jude to the prom just shot to the top of my list—but not her vision board. Not her dreams. She wanted them fiercely. So Jude could hook up with Leia. Hang out with his biker friends. He could think she was a prissy, naïve little girl with small dreams of being a teacher, getting married, and living in a pretty house on Bloom Lane. But it wouldn’t change who she was and what she wanted. She went to close the door but found Jude on the landing. Lowering his chin, he flicked a thumb over his bottom lip. And then, he looked up at her. “Yeah. I’ll take you to prom.”