Her Chaos

EGYPT

I swear on everything...I made the dumbest damn decision of my life.

What the hell possessed me to haul my big, eight-and-a-half-months pregnant behind up a mountain...in December...in a whole snowstorm? Oh, yeah. My ex. Rico. The same man who put a ring on another woman’s finger while I was somewhere fighting heartburn and swollen feet.

The disrespect.

He proposed to her. Little Miss “Miss Egypt, can you check my form?” from my dance class. 18, bendy, and flirty like she practiced it in the mirror. I knew she had a crush on him, every female with eyes did, but I never thought he’d actually be dumb enough to risk his family for a fantasy.

But here I was. About to be someone’s mother while he played husband to somebody who couldn’t even rent a car yet.

I needed a break. A breath. A scream. Something.

My best friend Blue offered her fiancé’s cabin weeks ago. Swore it was peaceful, quiet, and good for my soul. She wasn’t lying, but she also wasn’t here. She was somewhere in the Bahamas for her birthday, letting her man rub sunscreen on her back, drinking rum out of coconuts and being soft.

Couldn’t even be mad... even though I was not too fond of Mello.

I was happy for her, she deserved the world, but something about him never sat right with me. He gave me bad vibes, the kind that made your edges stand up. Always trying to control her every move, always catching an attitude whenever we hung out, even if it was just us going to grab food like we’ve been doing since middle school.

He was a wannabe dope boy, acting like he ran the city, chest all puffed up, knowing damn well that spot was already taken. New York already had its kings, and Mello wasn’t even close to their league.

From what Blue said, he was getting money, but still... something about him felt off. Like a dude who wanted the respect but didn’t really earn it.

But the cabin? That didn’t belong to him.

It belonged to his uncle Flip.

And Flip? Flip was heavy in the streets too.

Honestly, I was shocked Mello even agreed to ask his uncle if I could use the cabin. His ass did not like me, never made a secret of it either. But I guess he was trying to get back on Blue’s good side, because she had cursed him clean out about me the week before.

And when Blue snaps? Baby... she snaps.

They been together since high school, riding that toxic roller coaster so long it started looking normal to them. Break up today, matching outfits tomorrow. Argue in the parking lot but hold hands walking into the restaurant like nothing happened.

I love my girl, but she stay giving that man too many damn passes.

So yeah, maybe this was Mello’s little peace offering. A “see, I’m not that bad” moment.

Either way, I took it. Peace was peace.

So I packed my stuff, threw some snacks in a tote, and told myself I’d stay the weekend.

Then the storm hit.

The minute I turned off the main road? Boom. Snow so thick it looked personal. A whole tree laid out across the lower road like it was trying to square up with me. I was this close to crying, cussing, or both.

By the time I made it to the cabin, I was over it.

Then I stepped inside. And immediately wanted to detonate the whole mountain.

No lights. No heat. No power.

“Yo...you lying,” I muttered, hugging my belly like it could keep me warm. “You gotta be kidding me.”

The air inside slapped me like it had beef. My breath fogged up, my toes went numb instantly, and my back was screaming like it was on payroll.

I walked right back outside, ready to yell at the sky, when I saw it.

A black Land Rover. All tinted, all glossy, sitting in front of a cabin up the hill like it paid property taxes.

And the cabin? Please.

Modern. Two-story wide windows glowing like money lived there. One of those places that said “I don’t shop...I invest.”

I hesitated for two seconds. What if a murderer lived there? What if they were rude? Or worse...rich AND rude?

But then my baby kicked like, “Girl. Move.”

So I moved.

I trudged through snow that felt like shoulder-pressing me, got to the door, and knocked. Firmly. Like a woman who had nothing left to lose.

And when that door opened?

Chile.

Chaos. Damn. Cedeño.

Out of all the people in New York... out of all the doors in all the snowstorms... his had to be the one I knocked on.

The second he opened it, my heart slid right into my stomach. Chaos stood there looking every bit of fine and dangerous as he always did, only worse, because now he was up close. Real. Breathing. Blocking the whole doorway like the universe was playing in my face.

I’d only ever seen him in passing back in the hood. We didn’t run in the same circles, I wasn’t in nobody’s street business, and he wasn’t in nobody’s dance studio unless he was picking up one of his people. But I’d seen him. Everybody had. Sometimes he’d be posted up on the block talking to a few dudes who lived around my way, sometimes with his brothers, Havoc and Mayhem.

If you lived under a rock, that was the only way you didn’t know who the Cedeño brothers were. Hood royalty. They ran New York like they signed paperwork on it. And I swear on my unborn child, their mama had to have a coochie blessed by the ancestors because every single one of her sons came out fine enough to ruin a woman’s life without even trying.

But Chaos? Yeah... Chaos was a different breed.

Tall, all muscle, light caramel skin that looked expensive without him even trying. A goatee and beard lined up sharp, like his barber took his time. Long curly black hair pulled back in a low ponytail, and just from the texture you could tell he wasn’t all the way Black. Thick lips, dark like he stayed with a blunt between them. Kissable as hell, which I had no business noticing in my current condition.

And those eyes... Those intense light-brown eyes that looked right through me like he could read every thought I didn’t mean to have.

Lord. I had no damn business thinking the things I was thinking. Not big, swollen, and pregnant. Not abandoned by my ex and hiding in a snowstorm.

But Chaos Cedeño standing in that doorway?

Yeah... he made my brain forget all the rules.

“I-uh... yeah.” I pointed down the hill. “I’m staying at my friend’s cabin but the power is out, my phone’s dead, and I’m not about to go into labor freezing to death, so... hi.”

He looked at my belly, then back at me. Not with pity, with something steady, unreadable.

Then he stepped aside.

“Come in.”

The minute I stepped inside, the warmth didn’t just hit me, it wrapped around me like it had been waiting. Like the whole house exhaled and said, finally.

My eyes went wide before I could stop them.

It was beautiful.

The first thing I saw was the living room, wide open, ceilings so high I swear I got dizzy trying to see where they ended. Wooden beams stretched across the top, dark and smooth like they’d been handpicked from some enchanted forest that didn’t let regular folks visit.

A massive stone fireplace dominated one wall, flames crackling like they were happy to perform. The couch in front of it? Big enough to swallow a whole friend group. Soft looking, deep gray, with pillows arranged neatly.

Everything smelled expensive. Cedar? Leather?

And the floors... oh my God. Wide plank hardwood, smooth and glossy enough to catch reflections from the fire. My plain snow boots looked disrespectful standing on them.

To the left was a wall of windows, floor-to-ceiling glass, showing the snowstorm outside like it was just a screensaver.

Above the living room was a second floor with a sleek black railing. I couldn’t see much, just shadows of more space, more luxury, more “hey girl, your life is a mess but at least the view is nice.”

The kitchen sat to the right, all stainless steel and black marble countertops that shimmered under warm lighting. An island big enough to host a whole Thanksgiving. Not a single dish, crumb, or out of place item.

And me? I stood there, dripping snow on the immaculate floor, belly huge, hair frizzy, boots covered in snow.

“Let me get your coat?”

“Thanks,” I breathed.

He took it and hung it neatly. Of course he hung it neatly, he looked like the type to fold laundry with his veins popping out.

“I’m Egypt,” I said. “Thanks for...this.”

Chaos’s stare didn’t soften just because I was pregnant. If anything, it sharpened, like he was trying to figure out how the hell I ended up on his mountain with a belly full of someone else’s baby.

He crossed his arms, thick forearms, veins disrespectfully visible, and leaned his shoulder on the wall. A whole intimidating stance, like he was the judge, jury, and executioner of my life choices in that moment.

“Call me Chaos. What the hell you doing out here alone?”

Blunt. Direct.

I sucked in a breath. “I just... needed space.”

Chaos tilted his head a little, like he heard me but didn’t buy it all the way.

“Space is one thing,” he murmured, eyes dropping to my stomach before meeting mine again. “But this?” He motioned toward the storm outside with his chin. “This look like you ran from somethin’. Or somebody.”

His voice wasn’t harsh. If anything, it was gentle in that rough, manly way, the type Jahquel dudes had when they were trying to figure you out without making you feel small.

“I’m not judging you,” he added, softer now. “Just wanna know what had you out here risking both y’all.”

My throat tightened a little, blame hormones or the way he said both y’all like he already included my baby in the conversation.

“I needed... a breather,” I whispered.

Chaos nodded once, slow. “Aight. If that’s the part you comfortable sharing, I’ll take it.”

He didn’t push. Didn’t pry. Didn’t act like I owed him an explanation.

Just that quiet, grown man understanding that hit different.

“Look,” he said, stepping back so I could see more of the warm light behind him. “You good in here. That’s all that matter now.”

“Before you knocked, I talked to the ranger,” he said, voice low like he wasn’t bothered by a single thing in this world. “Roads are blocked. No way out until morning.”

“Great.” I sighed hard enough to fog the air. “My cabin is basically a freezer.”

“You can stay here,” he said, real casual, like offering a stranger a luxury cabin in a snowstorm was normal Tuesday behavior for him. “Ten rooms. Each got its own bathroom.”

I blinked at him. Once. Twice.

“You sure?”

Chaos gave me this look, steady, a little annoyed I even asked, and shook his head. “You really think I’m letting a pregnant woman sleep in the cold? Come on now.”

The way he said it... Firm. Certain. Like he’d already made the decision for the both of us.

Something fluttered low in my stomach, and I knew damn well it wasn’t the baby.

“I have a charger if you need one,” he added, already turning like he assumed I’d follow.

My whole soul lit up. “Thank you, I really appreciate it.”

He glanced back at me, eyes softening just a fraction. “You ain’t gotta thank me, shorty.”

The way shorty rolled off his tongue?

Yeah... I felt that.

I followed behind him, my hand on the small of my back because this baby had me walking like a tired auntie at a cookout. Chaos didn’t rush me. Didn’t look annoyed. Just walked slow enough that I could keep up, glancing back once like he was making sure I didn’t pass out.

He led me down a long hallway, the lights dim and warm, bouncing off the wooden walls. Everything smelled like cedar, cologne, and money. Not cheap money, old, quiet, dangerous money.

When he stopped at the third door on the right, he pushed it open with his palm and stepped aside so I could walk in first.

And chile... I swear my whole pregnant soul almost detached from my body.

The room was huge. Bigger than my living room and kitchen put together. Hell, bigger than my whole damn apartment if we being honest.

The first thing that hit me was the bed.

A massive king-size wooden bed sat in the center of the room, carved from some rich, dark wood that looked expensive and ancient at the same time. The headboard stretched almost to the ceiling, thick, detailed, the type of craftsmanship only men with heavy pockets bought. The comforter was a deep charcoal gray, thick and plush like it swallowed people whole. Pillows? Too many to count. All soft looking, layered, arranged like a hotel that didn’t play about its ratings.

Then the windows...

Floor-to-ceiling glass covered the entire back wall. Not half. Not a cute little section. The entire wall was just glass.

The snowstorm outside danced right up against the windows, flakes sliding down like a screensaver designed to calm your spirit. The way the room lights hit the snow made everything glow, this warm, golden winter vibe that made you forget you were stuck on a mountain in Chaos’s house, pregnant and thrown away by your trifling ex.

To the left was a sitting area, two cushioned chairs in a creamy off-white color, placed around a small glass table. A fur throw draped over one of the chairs, looking like something soft enough to sleep on by itself.

To the right? A walk-in closet with no door, just an open archway showing rows and rows of shelves, all empty, like waiting for somebody to move in.

And near the closet was another door, slightly cracked, revealing a glimpse of black marble.

Chaos nodded toward it. “Bathroom’s in there. Heated floors. Big tub.”

He said it so casually, like heated floors weren’t a luxury sent straight from God.

I stepped deeper into the room, slow, taking everything in. The hardwood floors were darker in here, almost black, polished enough to catch reflections from the firelight drifting in from the hallway. A thick area rug sat under the bed, cream and gray, soft looking, something your toes could disappear in.

A long wooden dresser sat opposite the bed, minimalistic and sleek, no clutter anywhere. “This room is...” I breathed, shaking my head. “It’s beautiful.”

Chaos shrugged one shoulder, leaning on the doorframe like this was the fifty-ninth room in his house and he barely noticed it anymore.

“It’s the warmest one on this floor.”

I turned toward him. He wasn’t staring at my stomach this time. He was looking at my face, real steady, like he wanted to make sure I actually believed him.

“You sure?” I asked again, even though I already knew damn well he was.

Chaos gave me that same look he gave earlier, the “stop asking me dumb questions” look, then exhaled through his nose with a tiny shake of his head.

“I’m not lettin’ you sleep in no cold ass cabin,” he said, voice low and final. “Not sure what you used to, but I ain’t that type of nigga.”

The way he said it... Deep. Firm. Not defensive, just facts.

It shut me right up.

“Where your bags?” Chaos asked.

“In my car. I didn’t have a chance to grab them.”

He held his hand out, palm up. “Give me your keys. I’ll go get ’em.”

I handed them over without thinking, my car was the only one outside besides his.

“I got two bags in the back seat,” I said.

I had packed one for me... and my hospital bag. Just in case.

Chaos nodded, like he already had it handled. Before walking out, he passed me his charger.

Then he left.

I sat on the huge king-size bed, sinking into it instantly, the blanket swallowing me whole. My phone lit up as it powered on, and for the first time all day, I felt my body start to unclench.

Chaos was out there in the snow getting my bags.

And I couldn’t even lie... It felt damn good not to have to do everything by myself for once.

I called Blue, but it went straight to voicemail. Figures. She told me earlier the reception might be trash on whatever island she was on.

I sighed and shot her a quick text instead, letting her know everything was good and I made it to the cabin safe. Last thing I needed was her panicking.

Because knowing Blue? Her dramatic ass would hop on the first flight back to New York, vacation be damned.

And I wasn’t about to be the reason she ruined her birthday trip. Not when she finally got a chance to relax.

I took a deep breath and eased back against the fluffy pillows. The second my weight hit them, my whole spine damn near thanked me out loud. My back had been killing me all day, but this bed?

This bed was different.

My mattress at home was nice, but this one felt like heaven with a warranty. Soft, warm, hugging every tired, swollen part of me like it knew I’d been through it.

For a minute, I just sat there breathing, letting the comfort swallow me whole while the storm raged outside.

I ain’t even realize I knocked out until the door clicked.

My eyes snapped open, heart jumpin’ like I got caught dozin’ on the train. Chaos walked in holdin’ BOTH my bags like they was corner-store plastic. Snow in his hair, flakes sittin’ on his shoulders like he just stepped out a damn winter movie.

Why this man so damn fine though?

He dropped the bags next to me.

“You good?” he asked, voice low. I nodded way too fast. “Yeah... yes. Thank you.”

He stared at me a little longer, eyes softenin’ in this quiet way that did somethin’ to my chest. “You sure?”

“Yeah. Bed feel... amazing.”

Chaos smirked. “Told you. This the best room in here.”

“You need anything else?” he asked, leanin’ on the dresser like he lived in that spot.

“I’m okay. Just... tired.”

His eyes dipped to my belly.

“How far along you said you were?”

“Eight and a half months.”

He let out a low whistle. “Damn. You right there at the finish line.”

“Tell that to my back,” I muttered, tryin’ to adjust.

Chaos pushed off the dresser.

“Your back hurtin’?”

I blinked. “You can tell?”

“Shorty, you walked in here holdin’ it like somebody was draggin’ you by ya spine.” He teased.

“I’m fine,” I lied.

He gave me that look. “That’s one thing I don’t do, lies. You don’t gotta front for me. Just say what’s up.”

I bit my lip. “I could be better.”

He nodded. “Understandable.”

“You ate yet?” he asked.

I hesitated... and that was enough of an answer.

Chaos sucked his teeth and shook his head. “Aight. Sit still. I’ma make you somethin’. You buggin’ goin’ a whole day with nothin’ on your stomach.”

A laugh slipped out before I could stop it.

He started toward the door, and I frowned. “Wait... you cook?”

Chaos paused, looked back, smirk growing a little.

“Hell no. My moms found out I was comin’ up here and packed the whole fridge like I was movin’ in. Dominican mothers don’t play, especially ones from uptown.”

I wouldn’t know anything about that since I could barely remember my own mom because she left me at a church doorstep when I was three. So I just smiled, letting the moment pass like it didn’t tug at something old inside me.

When he was gone, I dug into my duffle and took out my toiletries and pajamas. A cute little set Blue bought me, pink cotton pants and a matching top that said don’t feed when grumpy. I chuckled to myself, because that girl stay making me laugh even when my whole life felt upside down.

I took a shower and got myself together. The water felt good on my body, warm and heavy, melting a day’s worth of stress right off my skin. The shower was huge, big enough for like three people to fit in it comfortably. Another subtle hint that Chaos lived a life way different from mine.

When I was done, I wrapped a towel around myself and stood in front of the mirror. My hair was thick and bushy from the steam, dark curls stretching and spiraling like they had minds of their own. I put it into a ponytail, smoothing the edges with my fingers.

I loved my hair. It was big and beautiful, loud in the best way. I wore it out most of the time, this massive halo that stopped people mid-step. Folks always stared, not used to a Black woman walking around with a huge natural afro like a crown she wasn’t scared to carry.

Some people whispered. Some complimented. Some tried to touch it. They learned real quick not to.

I had a huge following on Instagram because of it. Natural hair girls, women who loved seeing someone who looked like them rocking hair that didn’t apologize for existing. My hair was my thing, my statement piece, the one part of me I never doubted.

I rubbed lotion on my body and stretch mark cream on my belly, moving slow, massaging it in the way my doctor told me to. The scent was warm and sweet, filling the bathroom, mixing with the steam still drifting around me. My skin drank it up instantly.

I slipped into my pajamas, rubbing my belly as the baby shifted. “I know,” I whispered to my little one. “Mommy tired too.”

I headed to the kitchen. The closer I got, the louder my stomach growled. The smell hit first, rich, heavy, seasoned just-right, and my whole body responded like it had been fasting for weeks.

Chaos was at the table already, sleeves pushed up, tattoos peeking out as he sat the food down like a man who knew his way around a meal. Steam rose from the plates, filling the air with that island-kitchen kind of comfort.

It looked so good I had to stop and just stare for a second.

Stewed chicken. White rice. Red beans. The sauce alone looked like it would have you licking the spoon and humming afterward.

My mouth watered instantly. Pregnant or not, food like that could make a grown woman emotional.

Chaos glanced up at me, one corner of his mouth tugging into that lazy smirk he always seemed to wear. “Told you I had you covered,” he said, voice low, calm, confident, like this was nothing to him.

“i see” I chuckled

I sat down and scooped up some rice, took one bite, and damn near moaned on the spot. Rich, creamy, perfectly seasoned. My eyes fluttered shut as I chewed. “Okay... yeah. You just earned my eternal gratitude. If this baby comes out in the next twenty-four hours, you’re officially responsible.”

That earned a low laugh from him, and I swear it rolled through me warmer than the fire had.

“You want water or juice?” he asked, already reaching for the pitcher.

“Water’s fine,” I said, trying not to look greedy as I took another huge bite.

He set a tall glass in front of me before taking the seat across the table.

I ate like I hadn’t eaten in days, and he let me. No questions, no hovering. Just quiet when it was needed and conversation when it flowed naturally. The clink of forks, the wind brushing the windows, the faint crackle of the fire down the hall.

We fell into a comfortable silence.

By the time my plate was clean, I leaned back with a satisfied sigh, rubbing slow circles over my belly. The food hit exactly how it needed to, warm and heavy in that comforting way. For the first time all day, I didn’t feel like I was running on fumes.

Chaos leaned back too, arms folded across his chest, studying me in that quiet way he had. Not intense. Not invasive. Just steady.

“So,” he said, voice low but even, “you ready to tell me what you doing way up in the mountains? Alone. Pregnant. Damn near ready to give birth. Where the father at? That nigga need his ass beat or something.”

I blew out a laugh because he looked dead serious. “That’s the million-dollar question, huh?”

For a second, I thought about brushing it off. Making a joke. But what was the point anymore?

I sighed, sinking deeper into the chair. “I needed to clear my head,” I admitted, rubbing my belly like I could calm both of us. “My ex-fiancé suddenly decided being a father wasn’t something he wanted. Even though it was his damn idea to have a baby. And apparently, I wasn’t the type of woman he wanted.”

My throat tightened, but I pushed on. “But one of my eighteen-year-old dance students definitely was. So... here I am.”

The words dropped into the room heavy and sharp. I didn’t mean to say it all so blunt, but once it was out, I felt lighter. Like I’d been holding my breath for months.

Chaos didn’t react right away. His jaw flexed, eyes narrowing slightly like he was processing each piece of what I said. Finally, he shook his head slow.

“That’s foul as hell,” he muttered. “Yeah, I’ma need this man’s name and address so I can beat his ass.”

Something about the way he said it let me know he wasn’t joking even a little bit.

I laughed. “He’s not even worth it, trust me. Rico liked to act hard, but I never once saw him get in the paint.”

Chaos grunted like he believed me but still wanted to fight him anyway.

I tilted my head, studying him across the table. “Now since we sharing... what exactly are you doing out here by yourself?”

That earned a low chuckle from him, deep and rough. He leaned back in his chair, broad shoulders stretching that thermal like it was struggling to keep up.

“To be real,” he said, “same reason as you. I needed time to think about some shit.”

I raised a brow. “Look at you keeping shit to yourself now,” I teased.

He smirked, tongue pressing against his cheek for a second.

“Aight, you got me,” he said. “I was dealing with this shorty. We was seeing how things went, trying to figure out if the relationship thing was what I wanted with her. Then she ended up pregnant.”

He paused, eyes dropping for a moment.

“Didn’t tell me,” he said, voice flattening. “I found out through a friend of hers that she had an abortion. And look... I believe in that my body, my choice thing. She don’t owe me her body. But damn... let a nigga know something.”

His jaw clenched, a flicker of something raw crossing his face before he looked away.

I stared at him, stomach dropping a little.

I wasn’t expecting that.

“That’s... messed up,” I said softly. “Really messed up.”

He nodded once, slow, like he didn’t need validation but appreciated it anyway.

“Yeah. Shit stung more than I thought it would,” he admitted. “Not how she handled her choice. But how she handled me.”

I understood that deeper than I wanted to. People could break you without even raising their voice.

I rubbed my belly again, more out of habit than anything else. “You loved her?”

Chaos huffed a humorless little sound. “Nah. Love wasn’t even on the table. But respect was. Trust was. Communication was. And she fumbled all that.”

He looked away for a second, jaw tightening again, that muscle jumping like he was grinding his teeth quietly.

“And after that,” he went on, “I just ain’t feel like being around people. Needed space. Needed quiet.”

I let that sit in the space between us. Two people hiding from the world in the same storm. Two people hurt for different reasons... but bruised in the same place.

“Guess we both running,” I said finally.

Chaos looked at me. Really looked. “Nah,” he said. “Never been the type to run, but sometimes you gotta step away to see shit clearly.”

His voice dropped lower. Calmer. More honest.

For the first time all night, I felt my chest loosen a little. Like I could breathe different in here. Like sharing pieces of myself didn’t make me weak.

“Still,” I said, half smiling, “crazy how we both ended up on a mountain at the same time.”

“Maybe not crazy,” he said quietly. “Maybe just... meant.”

My heart skipped so hard I almost reached for my chest. But I kept my face neutral, teeth dragging over my bottom lip as I looked down at the empty plate instead of him.

Chaos stood slowly, taking my plate without asking. “You want more?”

I shook my head. “If I eat any more I’m gonna need you to carry me to the bed.”

He raised an eyebrow like that was light work for him. “Ain’t nothing but a word.”

I laughed... but something warm slid down my spine anyway.

He rinsed the dishes, quiet but not awkward. It was crazy how normal it felt. Like we’d done this before.

When he finished, he dried his hands and leaned against the counter, arms crossed over his chest, watching me with that steady expression.

“You look tired,” he said. “You should lay down. Get comfortable.”

“I’m not really ready for bed anymore,” I said, shrugging.

“Aight. You wanna watch some TV?” he asked.

“Yeah... that’s cool.”

We ended up in the living room.

The sofa was massive, soft enough to swallow me whole. Chaos had made me a hot cocoa, rich and creamy, cinnamon sprinkled on top like he was somebody’s Dominican auntie in the kitchen. The warmth seeped right into me, calming my nerves in ways I didn’t even know I needed.

He leaned back, one arm stretched across the couch behind me, his cup in the other hand. He had that whole relaxed-but-alert energy, like even sitting down he took up space.

“So...” he said, side-eyeing me with a smirk creeping in. “How long was you and your lil ex-fiancé together? The lil punk ass nigga?”

I choked on my cocoa. “Chaos!”

He laughed, deep and low, like he meant that shit in his soul.

“Nah, for real,” he said, chuckling. “The lil dude that had you stressed? How long y’all was a thing?”

I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help laughing

“Me and rico together since I was sixteen. High school sweethearts or whatever. My best friend Blue told me from day one he wasn’t shit. But I was young... dumb... in love... all that. Kept giving him chances. Got so used to him I forgot who I was without him.”

The words felt like I’d been holding them in forever.

Chaos didn’t say nothing right away. He let it settle.

Then he asked, “How your peoples feel about him?”

I shrugged. “Never met my father. And my mom gave me up. I was three when I got put in foster care. Bounced around till I aged out. So... nobody to approve or disapprove of anything I did.”

The room got quiet for a second. Not awkward quiet... just real.

I stared at the rim of my cup, waiting for that pity look people always give when they hear foster care.

But he didn’t give me that.

The couch creaked as he shifted a little closer, eyes still on me.

“And I can bet that shit made you strong,” he said.

“Yeah I guess It did.”