• 46 | Sugar •
The inflamed soul
Colors, music and soldiers are what greet our vehicles as we reach the familiar building back in Vaelwyn.
The journey back here was comfortable, our soldiers exhausted, yet happy.
The last battle truly put an end to this war, Nekrava capitulating at last.
I even fell asleep on Azrael's shoulder during the ride and he did the same, his head resting on top of mine.
We come to a halt and exit the car, letting me take in the surroundings properly. Soldiers and other staff are cheering, Iskhera's flag is high in the air and some are singing the anthem. We walk towards the court in front of the main building of the base where the heads of the company stand, microphones in front of their faces.
One of them begins to speak, celebrating the end of the war, thanking all soldiers and remembering each one that didn't make it back.
Next, badges of honor are handed out and I zone out from time to time due to tiredness but suddenly feel wide awake when I hear my name being mentioned.
"We would like to award you with two badges for both your bravery and your leadership. Not only have you successfully commanded several troops to victory, but you also carried the life of General Azrael in your hands and most importantly, you brought a Nekravan General to his knees and made the rest of their army capitulate, ending this war." The man says and a big round of applause starts to ring in my ears.
"Go forward, Eden." Azrael tells me with a gentle pat on my back. I look at him with slight nervousness before I begin walking. Up front, I face an older looking man, one of the heads of the company, who I salute to as he starts to attach my badges to my uniform. I look over to the crowd to see Azrael taking pictures with his camera, a smile on his face and not giving any attention to anything else. It makes me feel warm, special.
One of the staff also takes a portrait picture of me, before the elder man speaks again.
"And while you are here, we want to request General Azrael to come forward too as the one who trained you and who made you follow in his footsteps." The man says, making all participants clap again.
I watch the General approach and allow myself to take his appearance in. An angel. The possibility of him thinking the same of me as I think of him feels surreal. Because the only question in my head is: How?
How could I ever be worthy to a man like that?
"The two of you have proven to be a team like no other and put an example for many soldiers. For that reason, we would like to give another badge of honor for the both of you, for the teamwork and your trust in one another." The man announces once Azrael stands next to me. I smile in joy and look up at him and see him having the same expression.
The badge gets handed to us and we both hold it with one hand as the photographer takes another shot.
After that we come back to our spot in the crowd while other soldiers get honored for extraordinary services. At the end, one more announcement is made.
"We would also welcome all of you to our official ceremony, three days from now. It'll take place in our main building of the company, on the event floor. We invite you to present yourselves from your best side, outside and inside." The man says, another round of applause following.
The thought of it fills me with curiosity and also excitement. It sounds fun and I make a mental note to ask Erika all about it, most importantly, how to dress.
Soon, the formalities come to an end and a small ceremony is being held in the cafeteria with lots of food and drinks. I usually didn't like the food here but it is so much better than what we had to eat at the camp and for the first time, I look forward to eat there.
Efram, Erika, Arthur and Violet sit with us at our table, all of our plates full.
"Suddenly, the food here doesn't seem so bad, does it?" Azrael says and I chuckle, nodding in agreement.
"Anything's better than what we had to eat for a year straight. But I also look forward to eat my own cooking again." I admit and he tilts his head with a small grin. "Me too."
His implication gets to me and I can't help but get a little red while he calmly continues to eat his food. I look around shortly, only to see Erika look at me with a knowing smirk, letting me know that she listened to the conversation just now.
Her eyes switch between me and him and I can practically read her thoughts. How she wants to tell me that she is right with her theory.
And I wish she is, too.
Lively conversations fill the room, accompanied by laughter, the sound of cutlery rattling and bottles of beer clinking. And after a few of them, my head feels a little dizzy. Noticing my condition, Azrael takes my unfinished bottle and puts it away as he only had one.
"You've had enough, Eden." He tells me and I look at him, squinting my eyes a little, disapprovingly. His grin grows. "Don't look at me like that. You're going to thank me." He says and rests his face in his hand. And somehow, the mere sight of him makes my face feel warm. I want to be closer to him.
So much closer.
And I curse myself and the alcohol for making me feel like this.
Once I realize that I've been staring, I quickly avert my eyes and try to focus on something else. Yet I feel like I'm still looking at him as he is all I can think of. I should've just went into my room because now, I don't want to be anywhere else but near him. My hands fiddle with each other and soon, the urge to smoke takes over.
"Are you coming out for a cigarette?" I ask him, the thought of being nearly alone with him nerve-wrecking right now though at the same time it's all I want.
"Sure." He answers with a subtle smile and gets up after me. I catch Erika winking at me and shake my head at her, heading outside the building afterwards.
Azrael and I step outside, coming to a halt at the side of the building.
"You don't usually drink, do you?" He asks and I tilt my head as my hand searches for my pack.
"Are you mocking me?" I inquire. "You should know me enough to tell." I add and he grins.
"Perhaps I do but I never experienced it with my own eyes." He counters and I roll my eyes playfully. "As if it's such a sight to see." I answer and his smile grows, almost holding something mischievous in it.
"Depends. The way you look at me might be a sight for me to see." He then says and places his left hand on top of my head, ruffling my hair afterwards.
My face gets hot in an instant, but I still feel glad that he at least cannot know what I thought in that moment.
He notices my bashfulness and chuckles quietly as I finally find my pack and get two cigarettes out.
"Idiot." I mumble and give him his.
He hums as I put mine between my lips and light it up, before my eyes fall on his again.
He might be thinking the same as me. A silence settles in and both of us know that I won't be using the lighter for a second time.
He puts his cigarette in his mouth too, his eyes switching between the pair of mine and my cigarette before he speaks up.
"Go ahead. Kiss me."
My stomach flips at his words and everything feels warm, like I have a fever. I stare up at his eyes and lean in closer, seeing him do the same towards my level. My right hand slowly moves to his shoulder to which I hear a quiet, sharp intake of breath from him before our cigarettes touch and mine begins to ignite his.
Our eyes don't leave each other and I catch myself wishing that there wouldn't be anything between our lips. Though I naively blame those thoughts on the alcohol.
His hand settles on my left cheek, cupping it and I subconsciously hold my breath.
"I'll have to confess something." He then mutters once smoke starts to come from his cigarette, his eyes glistening with unreadable emotions.
"What?" I ask quietly, our cigarettes not touching anymore, but our faces still close.
"I never really drink, either. So you may mock me for my condition too." He admits as his thumb slowly runs back and forth on my cheek.
In this moment I begin to see the effects of his beer as his cheeks have a subtle red tint, his speech is not as clear as usually and his balance isn't the best either.
He exhales deeply.
"I'm not good at hiding it for a long time either..." He confesses further and I don't dare to think about how close I actually am to just drop my cigarette and take his away too.
"Not when..." His voice is a whisper by now as his eyes take me in.
"...Not when what?" I inquire quietly and feel a strong breeze of wind, making me shiver a little. He looks at me for a few seconds longer before he sighs and shakes his head.
"...Nothing. You must be cold. Let's head back inside." He suggests instead and no matter how much I dislike the offer, I know it's for the best.
For me not catching a cold and for the both of us doing something that we will regret later.
Only after a few steps, he makes me stop again.
"One last confession." He then says and I look up at him, his cigarette hanging from his lips. I wait nervously as my face is already completely red from what happened in the last few minutes and I don't know what to expect.
"I want you to be my accompaniment for the ceremony."
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