Prologue
College life is supposed to be the best years of your life. Friends, freedom, fun... love, adventures, sleepless nights that actually feel exciting. Easy, simple, perfect.
That was what Nika initially thought.
She wasn’t exactly the friendly, sociable type. She was content with having just two close friends, people she only remembered to call or text when they reached out first and they don’t mind because they know her. Her life might seem boring to others, and sometimes even to herself, but she was happy with its simplicity.
That was before.
Now, she was feeling all sorts of emotions she had never felt before, noticing things she had never noticed, questioning things she had never questioned.
Last year, during her third year in college, Nika made what she considered the worst decision of her life. She had been excited. Hopeful. Almost certain she would hear the answer she had been wishing for.
She was wrong.
She chose to confess her feelings to Ken. He’s someone she met through her cousin, who was one of his closest friends. They went to the same university, crossing paths often enough that he slowly became a familiar presence in her life.
At first, she had been shy around him, careful with her words, unsure of where she stood. But little by little, that awkwardness faded. Conversations came easier. Laughter felt natural. Before she even realized it, he had become someone she felt close to.
And somewhere along the way, she fell for him.
It was her first time feeling that way about someone. She hadn’t planned to confess. She wasn’t even brave enough to do something like that. She was the type to keep things to herself, to stay quiet and hope feelings would eventually fade.
But it slipped out. By accident.
A moment of honesty she hadn’t meant to voice, spoken before she could stop herself.
In the end, they stayed friends. At least, that was what they both agreed on. But for Nika, nothing felt the same anymore. Conversations became careful, laughter felt forced, and the comfort she once had slowly faded into something awkward and distant.
She regretted confessing... and yet, part of her felt relieved. At least she had been honest. At least she no longer had to wonderwhat if. She told herself she could finally move on.
But she was wrong. So wrong.
She couldn’t... not when Ken kept sending mixed signals. Not when he lingered a little too long, smiled a little too softly, and acted like nothing had really changed, despite turning her down. Each small gesture made her waver, pulling her back to feelings she was trying so hard to bury.
Now, Ken had already graduated, while she was in her fourth year of college. Yet because they shared the same circle of friends, their paths still crossed. Again and again.
And every time they did, Nika was reminded of the one thing she was trying to forget.
Now, she was done running from it.
Ken had texted her yesterday, asking if they could meet on New Year’s Eve to watch the fireworks together. Of course, Nika agreed. Not because she was hoping for something more, but because she needed closure.
As the city lights blurred past her window, Nika took a slow breath. Kahit na anong mangyari, last na talaga ’to,she told herself.
When she arrived at the park for their meeting, the place was packed with people, buzzing with excitement for the fireworks display.
Compared to the chaos around her, Nika felt frozen in her own world. At first, she had thought those scenes on TV where the main leads fall in love, cry, or have dramatic moments were exaggerated. But now, feeling it herself, she realized they weren’t. Not at all.
As she neared the park fountain, Nika immediately spotted Ken, looking as awesome as ever. Honestly, she thought he would probably still look cool in her eyes even if he were wearing rags.
Ken, who had been scrolling on his phone, suddenly felt someone looking in his direction. He looked up and there she was. Nika.
He stood up, flashing that usual smile of his. The same smile that had once completely hooked Nika. He waved at her, casual but warm, and for a moment, Nika felt her chest tighten.
“Niks, relax ka lang,” she muttered under her breath as she walked toward him, trying to steady the sudden flutter in her heart.
He gave her a nod as she got closer, still smiling like nothing had changed. “Hi,” he said, his voice easy, almost effortless.
“Hello,” Nika replied, keeping her tone casual, though her hands were tightly holding her bag strap.
“There’s still an hour before the Fireworks countdown. Gusto mo bang mamasyal muna sa mga booth?”
“Sige.”
Nika actually wanted to talk to him once and for all before the fireworks started, but Ken dragged her toward the food stands.
“Try this,” Ken said suddenly, holding out a stick of grilled squid. “Sarap ’to, promise.”
Nika hesitated, looking at it. She loved to eat too, just like Ken and it’s one of the things they had in common. But right now, she couldn’t concentrate.
“Come on, you have to taste it,” he insisted, already taking a bite himself and grinning at her. “Just a little...”
Before she could say anything else, he held it up to her mouth. “Open.”
Nika sighed, but opened her mouth anyway. She wasn’t really one to say no when he insisted. The moment it touched her tongue, the smoky, savory flavor hit her, and she had to admit it was good.
“Sarap, ’di ba?” Ken said smugly.
She nodded as she chewed her food, enjoying the taste.
“Told you,” he said, grinning. “Next stop, takoyaki. Tapos barbeque, may nakita akong stall kanina.”
And just like that, Ken kept dragging her from stall to stall. She couldn’t really say no because it wasn’t in her nature, and partly... because it was him.
Before long, their stomachs were full, and they hadn’t even noticed how fast time had flown. Now, both of them were hurrying back to the fountain, knowing it would give them the best view for the full fireworks display.
“Bilisan natin, siguradong marami nang tao dun,” Ken said, gripping her hand and tugging her along, trying to walk as fast as possible.
“Hindi ko na kaya,” she whispered, barely audible, her voice trembling as if carrying the weight of months she’d tried to bury as she was looking at their hands then she stops.
He stopped mid-step and looked back at her. Without a word, Ken walked back and gently took her hand again.
“Bakit? Masakit ba yang paa mo?” Ken asked worriedly as he looked down at her feet.
Nika shook her head, biting her lip. “Hindi... hindi ’yan,” she murmured, her voice barely above a whisper before looking down. She didn’t want him to see her cry.
“I know we both agreed to stay friends, pero hindi ko na kaya,” Nika whispered, her voice trembling.
Ken stayed silent for a moment, his grip on her hand tightening just slightly.
“I just...” She took a deep breath, cutting herself off before her voice could break completely. Her gaze dropped to their intertwined hands for a brief second before she gently pulled hers away and took a step back.
“You keep confusing me with your actions. Kahit nga ngayon,” she said softly. “Why did you invite me to watch the fireworks with you? Just us two?”
“Niks—”
“Nakakapagod kayang magpanggap na okay lang ang lahat,” she continued, her voice trembling. “Na okay lang na hanggang kaibigan lang ang turing mo sa’kin.”
She finally looked up at him, her eyes glistening before looking down again. A low, shaky chuckle escaped her lips, as if she were laughing at herself for how foolish she’d been.
“Mukha bang hindi ako nasasaktan?”
For a moment, silence hung between them, heavier than the noise of the crowd. Then, somewhere in the distance, someone shouted.
“Ten!”
The New Year countdown had begun.
“Nine! Eight!”
Ken parted his lips, as if to say something but no words came.
“Five!”
She lifted her gaze once more, her eyes wet but resolute, meeting his for the last time.
“Three!”
Bursts of color exploded across the night sky, brilliant and chaotic, echoing the turmoil in her chest.
“Two! One!”
The fireworks flared in full glory. Nika forced a small, brave smile.
“Happy New Year,” she whispered.
Then, without looking back, she walked away.
And as Nika disappeared into the crowd, Ken remained rooted to the spot as he watch her fade into the crowd.
He just wanted to spend more time with her, to make memories. He just didn’t expect them to be this kind.
