The Recollection of Emily Banniere D'Fideli

-Emily Banniere D’Fideli-

It was a downpour that day, countless raindrops and gusts of wind battered the storefront window. Madame Chloe entrusted me to watch over the fashion shop while she went out to meet a client. Overjoyed I was to have Madame Chloe rely upon me, but unfortunately, with weather this intense, it was unlikely that a customer would show up. Regardless, I took that opportunity to continue reading a novel while watching over the store from the front desk.

Sitting right beside me was my junior, little old Charlotte. Madame Chloe seemed to have taken great interest in her, as a seamstress she possessed a talent for designing dresses and suits. She sat there diligently, with a pencil in hand, sketching out several designs. Though it seemed like she was struggling as she pressed her left hand against her forehead, messing up her beautifully styled short blond hair, her big round glasses obscured her deep blue eyes, but her face showed visible frustration. This went on for an hour before she finally let out an enormous sigh.

“Sigh~ I can’t. Everything I draw today looks so horrible,” she complained. “Miss Emily, what do you think of these designs?” She shoved the mess of papers onto my side of the desk.

“Hm…” I took a quick glance at the sketches. She had sketched out at least ten dresses, each of them unique, sharing little similarity. “I see, they look fine at a glance,” I said in a monotone manner, “but it feels quite uninspired and bland.” Truly, she was talented, most people would struggle to come up with ten different dresses in an hour. The only thing she lacked was experience, such was the reason her sketches did not move me.

“Sigh~,” she laid her head on the table, feeling defeated. “You don’t need to say it bluntly like that. Besides, you only took a quick glance. Did you even look at them properly?”

“I’ve been doing this for a long time now, I can tell at a glance what does and doesn’t look good. Also, I didn’t say that your designs were bad, just uninspired. You were trying to copy Madame Chloe’s style and failed horribly at it, weren’t you? I strongly suggest you try to find your own style.”

She stretched her body and leaned back in her chair. “I understand… but I just really admire Madame Chloe’s designs. Sigh~ I wonder when I can create designs as good as hers?”

“You simply need to be patient. Madame Chloe is already tutoring you, and I have to admit that your designs are really inspiring… at least the one that lands. Your poor designs, however, are absolutely horrible. Truly, it is a mystery how you could come up with the most groundbreaking designs and the pinnacle of mediocrity on the very same day.”

“You don’t mince words, do you? Sigh~ So, how long would I need to study before I can begin to imagine matching Madame Chloe’s level?”

“Well, I suppose five more years seems reasonable”

“Five, huh… That’s still quite far away… Speaking of which…” she leaned her head forward, resting it in her palm. ”How long have you been working with Madame Chloe?”

“Hmm… I was twenty when I started working with Madame Chloe, that means it’s been about seven years… how time flies.”

“You’ve worked for seven years but I’ve never seen you be passionate about working as a seamstress. If anything it seems to me that you only care about serving Madame Chloe.” she teased.

“Why wouldn’t I? Serving Madame Chloe is the greatest honor that she has given me, it’s also the only way I could repay her for saving me.”

“Saving you? What do you mean?”

“Oh, did I not tell you already? Are you curious?”

“Pray tell.”

“Very well,” I closed my novel “Now where should I start… My father was a successful businessman, he made a fortune and his name was well known in the industry, so many people wanted to get on his good side. One day, there was a ball at a plaza whose name I can’t recall. The ball itself was a gathering for merchants and businessmen, it was the perfect event for them to establish connections with companies that they would otherwise never have the chance to get in contact with. My father brought me along, for it was also my eighteenth birthday. He wanted me to start establishing my standing within society. I remember being quite unhappy spending my birthday surrounded by strangers, it also didn't help that my father simply left me alone as he talked to the other businessmen in the party”

“As I stood there alone, a man approached me. He, like you, was from the Brillier family, as such he also had blond hair. His stature was tall, his shoulders were broad giving him a robust look. He had green emerald eyes. His face was by no means handsome, but he was above average in terms of looks for his eyes were soft, radiating a ray of kindness”

“He introduced himself as Robert Rey D’Brillier and invited me to dance. It seemed to me that he did that out of pity, at first I declined the invitation but he kept on insisting, I accepted the offer just to get him out of my hair”

“We danced together, eyes interlocking. The music had a slow rhythm, he took the chance to compliment me as we danced slowly. He said that my bright blue hair was as beautiful as the blue sky, he said that I must’ve been a particular woman as my long hair was perfectly straight and well maintained”

Charlotte interrupted me, “You used to have long hair?” she asked

“Yes, though I quickly cut it shortly after meeting Madame Chloe” I said, taking off my monocle, wiping it clean. “Now where was I… ah, to keep it brief, I took an interest in Robert, and it seemed like he did too. After the dance we shared a toast and talked for a while. Even after the ball was over we kept in contact via mail, this went on for about a half a year. By that time both Robert and I realized that we love each other, without any delay he requested to be engaged with me to which I happily accepted”

“Hm? You were engaged? Seeing as you are still single I guess it didn’t work out huh?” Charlotte interrupted. As usual, her sharp tongue slipped again, though I knew that she didn’t mean it, she was never good with words to begin with. Still I couldn’t help but glare at her remark. “Ah, sorry…” She apologized.

“It was only half a year into our engagement when misfortune befall my family. Father had been working late for the past few days, Mother was worried that something might happen to him on his way home as there were news of some rowdy individuals roaming around the area at night. She suggested that he return home by hansom. Father had always liked walking home, he said that it was a good habit for someone his age, so he told her that it was nothing to worry about and that he’d be fine. He should’ve heeded her warning, as he did not return the following night. They found him limp in a pool of blood on one of the bridges in town. He was shot multiple times to the abdomen and chest, he died of blood loss. His wallet was found next to him, empty, while his suitcase laid open not far from the body, its contents ransacked. In his breast pocket, they found a broken pocket watch with a bullet lodged into it. The time showed 10:18 which was around the time he would return from his work. Nearby residents also reported hearing loud gunshots at the time. It was a clear and cut case of a robbery”

“Mother was quite distraught upon hearing the news, she locked herself in her room and cried herself to bed. I only saw her face at Father’s funeral where she cried uncontrollably when they lowered the coffin. After the funeral, the ownership for the company Father ran was transferred to Mother, she could no longer lock herself and had to run the company despite her grief. However, she was no businesswoman, following Father’s death, there were a lot of companies reaching out towards Mother hoping to get on her good side. They very quickly realised how inexperienced she was so they tried taking advantage of her instead, offering absurd deals that heavily benefits them while burdening her company. The company slowly lost its power. She then found out that Father had a loan, he had borrowed a fortune to start his company, it was agreed upon that he would repay the borrowed money over a long period. Apparently he kept it a secret from us so that we wouldn’t be worried, and it worked, as he earned more than enough money to not only shower us with luxuries but also pay the toll without much difficulty. But now that the company is losing money, paying the monthly toll became a burden, after six months of running the company, Mother was barely able to pay the toll”

“She was at her wits end as there was no way that she could’ve paid for next month. It was then that Robert suggested that she sell the company to him. We were already engaged for a year at that point, our marriage was getting close. Robert also has experience as a businessman, considering we were going to get married handing the company to him seemed like the logical choice. After considering it for a few days, Mother agreed to the suggestion and legally handed the ownership to Robert. It seemed hopeful after that, but that same feeling would soon be shattered. The very next day, Robert had called off our engagement, instead he declared that he was marrying another woman. I found out later on that he had been seeing another woman for quite some time. In fact, the reason he approached me at that ball was to get close to my Father. Now that he acquired ownership of his company he had no more reason to keep me close by, truly a fool, I was”

“Mother was shocked to hear that Robert had cut ties with us, it looked to me that she was more depressed about it than I was. Who could blame her though, the company that Father had built was stolen from her. She tried speaking to Robert but every time she visited his home the servants would kick her out. Eventually, she stopped trying. One day, on a cloudless night, just two days after Mother stopped trying to contact Robert, I was bringing dinner to her room. She didn’t have the appetite to eat, but she had barely eaten anything that day. I knocked on the door to her room, no response. I knocked once again yet the room remained silent, seeing as I was not getting any response, I placed the tray on the floor and walked away. But something didn’t seem right to me and after only taking five steps, I turned back and tried opening her bedroom door. To my surprise, it was unlocked. I opened the door slowly and was greeted by a surreal scene. The room was dark, save for the moonlight from the opened window, letting in a cool breeze. The full moon can be viewed from the window, its round shape interrupted by a dark floating silhouette, swaying lightly from the breeze. The moonlight shone upon the silhouette revealing Mother with a rope tied around her neck, with her feet dangling above the floor, swaying from side to side like a pendulum. In her right hand, she grasped a crumpled photo of father”

“The police said that she was already dead when I found her. They had also asked me several questions, mostly about possible reasons on why she might commit suicide. Of course, I told them the series of events that led up to that moment, about father’s untimely demise and about Robert as well, but ultimately they could not do anything about it. Mother sold the company to Robert out of her own volition, the police agreed that what Robert had done was cruel, but legally there was no crime being committed. As per the contract, he held full ownership of the company, and since we never got married, on paper he had no connection with my family. It was also well within his rights to cut ties with us if he so chooses, no matter the reason. And so the case was close, my mother’s death was simply written as suicide”

“A week had passed since the incident, I felt only emptiness in my heart. With no income, I had almost lost everything, only the house remained in my possession, but what good is an empty house if I couldn’t even feed myself. That night, I was too tired to even sleep, so I grabbed Mother’s black coat and left the house. At first there were a couple of pedestrians on the streets, but as the night went on I encountered less and less people until I was the only one on the street. I was only walking aimlessly at the time, before I realised it, it was already midnight and the way home became too far. It was a very cold night, the moon was still a full moon, the same moon I saw in Mother’s room radiates a cold glow, as if mocking my misfortune. I turned my gaze toward the empty street, trying to forget the scene I saw. A three story building caught my interest, it looked like its renovation was still in progress as the window had no glass, and the interior was empty, filled only with dust. Seeing as I had nowhere to go, I entered the empty building”

“I couldn’t really remember much about that time, my body moved on its own out of grief. Eventually I found myself standing at the top of the building. Seeing as the building was still under renovation, there were no guard rails. I approached the edge of the building to take a good look at the surroundings, because I was wandering aimlessly, I couldn’t remember where I came from nor where I was at the time. From there, I can see rows of buildings lined up with each other. Just across the street are buildings decorated with signs, unique for each store. I couldn’t see much outside of my surroundings as none of the windows were lit up, it was already midnight after all, everyone was fast asleep, I could only see as far as the moonlight let me before its light faded as the clouds obscured it. A cold light wind brushed past my long hair, I stepped much closer to the edge of the building and looked straight down, sighing. As I said, the building was three stories high, so it was quite high up. I stared blankly at the ground for a couple of moments, I distinctly remember looking at my feet with the toes hovering on air while I balanced my heels on the building’s edge”

“As I stood there silent, a single white speck crossed my line of sight. I instinctively looked up and saw dozens of snow slowly falling from the night sky. As my mind was distracted by the sudden snowfall, I heard someone talking. ‘It’s a good night, but it’s far from the best…’ the voice of a woman said ‘with that in mind, mademoiselle, are you sure you want it to be your last?’ I turned to my left and a figure of elegance revealed herself to me. Her posture was straight, almost like a statue, at a glance her long straight hair was black, but as the moon peeked through the clouds, its light shone brightly on her hair, showing a dark navy blue. She wore a black dress along with a maroon scarf that contrasted with her navy hair. I had thought that I had met a goddess, for the moonlight illuminated her fair face while light bounces from the snowflakes in the air making them glow as if they were fairies. She looked at me with kind eyes, but with a devilish red coloured iris, I felt a sense of unease as I stared into her perfectly symmetrical face save for the mole under her left eye”

“A mole under her left eye?” Charlotte murmured “Oh, is this when you first met Madame Chloe?”

“Indeed. I was distracted by her beauty as she walked closer to the edge of the building, peeking her head out to look at the ground. ‘Three stories, indeed, this is a fatal height to fall from’  she said ‘But not an ideal one to do so, it won’t be a quick death. I’d say you will just splat on the ground, surviving with a battered body. But the moon is at its zenith, no one will be around as you slowly die a painful death from blood loss. With that in mind, will you proceed?’ She asked bluntly

“ ‘Trying to be a hero?’ I remarked ‘What I am going to do is none of your concern!’

“ ‘You are right to say that it is not my concern, and to be frank, I care not the slightest whether you want to live or die, if you desire the latter then you’re more than welcome to do so, I won’t get in your way.’ she said smiling. She pointed her finger toward the store directly across the building we were standing on ‘I own a fashion shop you see, and it’s starting to get more and more visitors by the day. If news were to go around about a dead body found in the building directly across from it, then I’m sure some sort of bad luck would affect my humble shop. I’m not the most superstitious person but I’d rather not have such an incident happening so close’

“What she said enraged me, ‘Are you mocking me?’ I lashed out ‘You’ve no idea what I’ve been through! To have everything taken away from you, do you know what it feels like?’

“ ‘Hollow’ she interrupted ‘I felt hollow when that happened to me’

“A brief silence filled the atmosphere as snow started piling up around our feet. Madame Chloe stepped closer to me and stared at my face intently, I could feel her warm breath near my face. After a short moment, she stepped back and looked at me from head to toe, examining me carefully. Her actions perplexed me at the time that I almost forgot why I had come to the top of the building. Eventually she smiled ‘You’ve got a good face’ she said ‘not to mention a well proportioned body. Honestly it’d be a waste for you to die here. Madamoiselle, pray tell me your name’

“ ‘Emily, It’s Emily Banniere D’Fideli’ I answered hesitantly

“ ‘Nice to meet you Miss Emily, I am Chloe Fantoine D’Fideli’ She replied  ‘As a fellow Fideli member I would like to offer you a choice. Work for me in my humble shop, for you see, I’m looking for a model to don the clothes I design. It’ll truly be a waste for you to die here as I haven’t found anyone I would like to be my model’

“ ‘A model?’ I murmured as I pondered on the suggestion.

“ ‘You don’t fancy the idea perhaps? I suppose someone at the end of their rope wouldn’t really care much for anything. I kindly ask you that you at the very least try the job for a mere week, if you still feel hollow at the end of the week then you’re more than welcome to wither away, although if you still plan to do so, then do it else where, as long as it is far from my shop’

“After a brief silence, I accepted the offer. Looking back, I should not have any reason to accept the offer given the state of mind I was in, but perhaps I was still looking for a little bit of hope. Considering it was midnight and my house was quite far away, Madame Chloe offered me a room in her shop. I slept on the couch in the living room on the second floor. Staring at the unfamiliar ceiling, I forced myself to sleep”

“I’m sorry Miss Emily, did you say that she asked you to become a model,  but aren’t you a seamstress?” Charlotte asked.

“Oh, yes, I started out as a mere model, I was just about to get to that part so bear with me for a moment. I woke up very early in the morning, I couldn’t sleep all that well. I went down to the first floor around five or six in the morning. When I went to sleep the night before, Madame Chloe was still awake, fine tuning a dress, and now she was sitting at the reception table with a toast and coffee while reading a newspaper very early in the morning, it’s almost as if she doesn’t need to sleep”

“ ‘Ah, good morning Miss Emily, I see that you’re an early bird’ she greeted me smiling

“ ‘I couldn’t get a good sleep, besides, you seem to wake up much earlier than me’

“ ‘My, I’m sorry that I could not offer a more comfortable stay. Care for some coffee, Miss Emily?’

“ ‘I’ll pass, I don’t fancy coffee’

“ ‘Is that so? Well, how about we get started for the day? Just last night I finished a couple of dresses that I’ve been working on. I would like you to try them on’ she then stood up and went to the back before returning with a set of clothes”

“She dressed me in all kinds of dresses, each time she would adjust the designs of the dresses ever so slightly, while some she straight up threw to the trash. Yet despite that she would continue to smile, treating the whole thing as an experiment”

“But doesn’t Madame Chloe smile all the time?” Charlotte added “In fact, I seldom see her frown, even when she scolds me she continues to smile”

“Yes, that is true, but I get the sense that she constantly puts on a fake smile, even when I first met her. The only time I see her put on a genuine smile is when she designs clothes…”

“Really? It all looks the same to me” Charlotte said.

“Well, let’s just say that it fascinated me, for someone who constantly smiles, the only thing she truly liked was sewing, on the third day of working with her, I asked her a question ‘Madame Chloe, why did you decide to become a seamstress?’ I asked as she was adjusting the back of the dress I was wearing.”

“ ‘No reason really, it just so happened to be the one thing that I am good at’  she said dismissively. But that answer did not satisfy me, so I pressed further.

“ ‘But it seems to me that sewing is about the only thing you enjoy, I want to know the reason for that joy’ I said.

“She did not answer immediately and stopped adjusting my dress as she pondered for a moment ‘Someone once called me beautiful…’ she murmured ‘turns out it was a lie. When I sew, I forget everything that plagues my mind… that is all, no more, no less’ I could not see her face as she was standing behind me, but I was sure that that was the only time that she frowned in front of me.

“ ‘Say, Madame Chloe… can you teach me how to sew?’ I said spontaneously.

“ ‘My, have you taken an interest? What brought this on may I ask?’

“ ‘I would like to taste that joy you are experiencing while sewing… perhaps like you, it would help me forget the misfortune that fell upon me’

“I remember Madame Chloe letting out a small chuckle, it seems like she found me quite amusing. and so, ever since that day I’ve been working and studying under Madame Chloe”

“Ah… that’s quite a long story isn’t it…” Charlotte remarked “But are you sure you want to tell me that many details? Isn’t this a sensitive topic for you? It’s not something you just tell to anyone”

“Worry not my dear Charlotte, I only tell this to the closest of friends, or… do you not consider me a friend, dear Charlotte?” I teased.

“What? No no no, of course I see you as a friend, Miss Emily” She said with a flushed face “I… just didn’t know that you consider me as a close friend… I had thought that you didn’t really like me, since you always seem to not care much… to me at least”

“Oh, it seems like I’ve rubbed off on you the wrong way. I’ll keep that in mind. though I must remind you, whenever you get into some kind of trouble, then don’t hesitate to turn to me, okay?”

It was still raining, but the intensity has definitely gone down. We continued watching over the shop, awaiting Madame Chloe’s return.