Chapter One: HER
Silvia didn’t always look like someone who carried darkness inside her.
On the surface, she was almost… soft.
Curly hair that never fully behaved, always falling loose around her face no matter how tightly she tied it. Large glasses that slipped down her nose when she was tired—which was often. There was something unintentionally gentle about her appearance, something that made people assume she was patient, kind, safe.
And in a way, she was.
At least during the day.
She worked as a preschool teacher.
Small chairs. Crayon-stained tables. Sticky fingers tugging at her sleeves while little voices called her name over and over again.
“Miss Silvia!”
“Miss Silvia, look!”
“Miss Silvia, I made this for you!”
Children loved her.
Maybe because she never raised her voice.
Maybe because she understood silence better than most adults ever could.
Maybe because she knew what it felt like to be small and unheard.
She smiled for them. Genuinely.
She tied shoelaces, wiped tears, and clapped for messy drawings like they were masterpieces. In that small classroom, she was someone else entirely—someone stable, someone warm.
Someone untouched.
But the moment she stepped out of that building, the softness slipped.
She lived alone.
Well… not completely alone.
There was Butter.
A small, pale orange female cat with sleepy eyes and an attitude far too big for her size. She had shown up one rainy evening outside Silvia’s apartment building—soaked, shivering, and meowing like she owned the place.
Silvia had crouched down, holding out her hand cautiously.
The cat had walked straight into her palm like it was already decided.
No hesitation.
No fear.
She remembered laughing quietly under her breath.
“You’re bold,” she had whispered.
When she brought her upstairs, she didn’t have proper food. Just a bit of bread and leftover butter from the fridge.
The little cat devoured it.
Messy. Greedy. Smearing it across her tiny face.
Silvia had watched her, something unfamiliar warming her chest.
“Fine,” she muttered softly. “You’re Butter now.”
The name stuck.
And so did she.
Butter became the only thing in her apartment that felt… real.
She slept curled against Silvia’s side most nights, purring softly like a quiet heartbeat she could borrow. Sometimes, when the nights got too heavy, Silvia would bury her face in Butter’s fur just to feel something alive that didn’t hurt her.
She never asked questions.
Never judged.
Never left.
Silvia had learned early that people did.
Her father left before she could even remember his face properly—just fragments of arguments, a slammed door, her mother crying on the floor.
After that, it was just the two of them.
And addiction.
Her mother faded slowly, like something rotting from the inside out. Some days she was loving, almost normal. Other days she was someone else entirely—sharp, cruel, unreachable.
Silvia learned to read moods before words.
Learned when to stay quiet.
When to disappear.
When to endure.
Until one day, her mother didn’t wake up.
And just like that, Silvia became no one’s responsibility.
The system passed her through hands, places, temporary homes that never felt like anything close to belonging.
She grew up fast.
Too fast.
By the time she reached adulthood, she had already built walls so high she couldn’t see over them anymore.
Now she lived in that small apartment with her cat, her routine, and the quiet that never really left.
By day, she was Miss Silvia.
Gentle. Safe. Trusted.
By night…
She was something else.
Something numb.
Something restless.
Something that kept looking into the dark… almost like she was waiting for it to finally look back.
