Chapter 1:"The Threshold"
Shivanya POV~
It was going to be a long day. I could feel the weight of it pressing against my eyelids before I even opened them. Mama's voice drifted in from the hallway, a rhythmic echo trying to pull me out of the only place I felt safe: the cocoon of my blankets. I peeled my eyes open with a groan, staring at the familiar cracks in the ceiling.
My limbs were a tangled mess, caught in a conspiracy with the bedsheets. I wanted-no, I ached-for just one more hour of oblivion. To stay in that deep slumber where I didn't have to be "on" for anyone.
Welcome to reality, Shivi. It doesn't care about your dreams.
Today wasn't just any Monday. It was my first day at Guardian Elites. After graduating in April, the job hunt had been a soul-crushing marathon. Even with a valid degree, the world seemed to have a "No Vacancy" sign hanging over it. But after a dozen trials and interviews that left me shaking, one of the biggest security firms in the country had recruited me for their PR team.
This was it. My first step toward independence. All my life, I'd been the one who stayed, the one who depended, the one who didn't want to worry about my parents. Now, I finally had a chance to live my own life.
"Shivanya!" Mama's voice sharpened. "Are you awake yet?!"
"Haan, Mama!" I called back, my voice still thick and gravelly with sleep.
I took a breath that felt too shallow for the day ahead and untangled myself from the sheets. In the mirror opposite my bed, a stranger stared back. My hair, which I'd carefully braided the night before, was now a literal bird's nest.
I stumbled toward the washroom, only to find the door firmly shut. I leaned my forehead against the wood and closed my eyes, counting to ten.
"Rohan! Get out!" I hammered on the door. "It's getting late. I have to go to work and it's my first day!"
"Maybe you should've thought about that before indulging in your 'beauty sleep,' you dumbo!" his voice muffled by the steam and his own ego.
"It's a miracle you even woke up before me for once," I grumbled.
The door swung open instantly. Rohan stood there, looking far too refreshed, and reached out to ruffle my already disastrous hair. "I am the miracle, Shivi."
"Mama!" I yelled, more out of habit than actual hope for a rescue.
"God! These children have grown into adults and I still have to break up their fights?" Mama shouted from the kitchen. "Shivanya! Rohan! Get ready now or you're both going to miss the bus!"
I rushed through my routine, pulling on a pink kurta and my favorite mom jeans, pinning my white dupatta to my right shoulder with shaking fingers. I looked at myself one last time. I wasn't like the rest of my family. They were the kind of people who walked into a room and owned it. I was just... lean, tall, with brown skin and a few stubborn pimples. Society's "beauty standard" was a club I hadn't been invited to.
I didn't mind it usually-until someone pointed it out at a wedding or a family function. Then, the insecurity would flare up like a fresh burn. I kept it to myself, though. I didn't share my fears with anyone because I knew they'd just become punchlines.
That was my "people-pleasing" default setting. I wanted to be approachable. I wanted to be liked. Even my best friend, Nitya, told me I was a doormat. "They use you, Shivi," she'd say, playing the role of the protective mama bear because I couldn't say "no" to save my life.
I headed downstairs. The atmosphere at the breakfast table was the usual mix of domestic noise and underlying tension. Papa was already there, flanked by Rohan and Kavya-the baby of the family and the undisputed queen of the house.
"Good Morning, Papa!" I said, trying to sound like a girl who wasn't terrified of her own future.
"Morning, Shivi," he muttered, not looking up from his tea.
I sat down and waited for Mama to pass the parathas. I felt like a guest in my own home.
"So, what exactly is your role in this security company, Shivi?" Papa finally asked, his eyes briefly flicking toward me.
"I'm in the Public Relations team, Papa. I'll be the writing agent for their ads and announcements. It's an internship for now," I said, a spark of genuine optimism lighting up my voice. "But after six months, if I prove I'm good, they'll make it permanent."
"If?" Kavya's voice cut through the air, sharp and mocking.
I looked at her. Her teenage hormones were clearly working overtime this morning.
"Yes, Kavi. If," I replied, my excitement deflating like a punctured balloon. "If I work hard and prove I'm capable, they'll keep me. If I'm not... I'm out."
"Then let's just say goodbye to this job now," she laughed, as if she'd told the joke of the century.
Mama just shook her head, saying nothing to defend me. Rohan swatted Kavya's arm, a small gesture of sibling loyalty, but it didn't take away the sting. I gave them a tight, practiced smile-the one that says it doesn't hurt even when it does-and finished my breakfast in silence.
From the corner of my eye, I watched Mama kiss Kavya on the head as she sent her off to school with Papa. I'd always envied their bond. It's not that Mama didn't love me, but she loved Kavya more. She always took her side.
I loved my sister, too-she could be the most lovable person in the world when she wanted to be-but the gap between us felt like a canyon. If I tried to hug Mama right now, it would just feel... awkward. Weird.
I gripped the strap of my bag, standing up to leave. They didn't think I could do it. They thought I was too soft, too plain, too "Shivi."
But today, at Guardian Elites, I wasn't going to be a people-pleaser. I was going to be a professional.
["Ghar ke hi aaine mein khud ko ajnabi paaya hai,
Maine apno ki hi bheed mein khud ko tanha paaya hai.
Mere hauslon ki udaan ko parakhne nikle hain wo,
Jin hone meri har koshish ko hamesha azmaya hai."]
