A nice idea

"From your description of the story it sounded like a nice idea, someone that struggles with his life at the brink of losing everything that then finds a shining light out of his misery. I like that idea it's a concept I greatly enjoy. After reading I have a few things that might help you draw in more readers. Please note that it's based on my personal preference and you don't have to follow a word I said if you don't agree with it. They are just my thoughts, I feel like might help you. Okay as said I like the concept, though the text didn't give me the feeling of a desperate character. Like I would image even knowing his faults he would feel a bit more panicked when he feels the impending finality of being handed divorce papers. Especially since later he can't sign them because of reasons that aren't yet explained to the reader. Something that could help that would be if he showed some more emotions or some dialogue or inner monologue of him cursing as he gets the papers, maybe feeling defeated. I am not good in putting all that into third perspective which is why I mostly write first perspective for such things. There was also this mention of him not having slept in 51 hours to me the text didn't reflect that. Same with the upper thing it might help if you put in some symptoms of sleep deprived people like a tremor of his hands or him dozing off almost causing a car crash on his way back home. That would make the text feel more authentic which helps you drag readers into the scenes hook them and make sure they want to keep reading. Additionally, a thing that minorly confused me was that you said at one point that he is a private investigator to my understanding someone that is hired to find people or trail someone and so on. At another point he was called a Detective which to me as I understand that term is a policeman that investigates cases in a police station. Could just be me misunderstanding the term English isn't my first language. In case I am not some more context could help you there. Lastly something I get to hear a lot as well is the term "Show don't tell" which essentially means instead of spelling it out for your readers let them piece together the scene based on some dialogues or immerse them into it with smells sounds and so on. An example you describe his notebook, maybe it smells like spilled coffee when he opens it or maybe it feels used because he had it for so long. The possibilities are endless. In summery keep writing ignore my ramblings when you don't agree with them. Just know that we start at some point and we need just to keep writing and then we will get where we want to be."