Touching

"This is a touching story about an Asian girl trying to make her way in England at school. I found it actually quite sad, but that’s a great feat of the author, to put so much emotion into this story. I just have some issues with the punctuation and layout. The punctuation is really quite bad, in such a way that it made it hard to read for me sometimes. And by layout I mean the long paragraphs, the fact that it is sometimes unclear whether something is a title or part of a sentence, etc. I also believe that there is too much conversation in this story and too little description. Besides these two points I think the story is great, especially the plot and the emotion! Keep it up."