In another life, we would

Once upon a time, when I was in Class 1, I saw her for the very first time in the school van. I didn’t know who she was, where she came from, or anything about her… yet something in my heart quietly pulled me towards her.

Days passed, and with time, I slowly came to know her name. It felt strange—how someone so unknown could become so special without even trying. She was lovely, charming, and incredibly cute. Even her name had a kind of magic that stayed in my mind.

But back then, I was just a child… and along with those innocent feelings, I carried a silent fear—a fear of speaking, a fear of being noticed, a fear of expressing what my heart didn’t yet understand.

But the biggest fear in my heart was this—she belonged to my own locality. In our culture, people from the same locality are seen as brothers and sisters, and love between them is often judged and spoken about badly.

That thought always scared me… what if my parents never accepted us? What if her parents also refused? These questions never left my mind.

Yet, no matter how strong those fears were, my love for her was even stronger. I tried to ignore everything, every rule, every doubt… because all I could think about was her.

I wanted to know everything about her, every little detail, but I could only learn a few things. Still, those small pieces meant the world to me.

After a few months, we finally got to know each other… we talked, we shared moments. But there was one thing she never knew—

how deeply I loved her.

I kept it all inside my heart, telling no one… not even her.

Seeing her every day filled me with a strange kind of happiness and energy… like my whole day suddenly had a reason. But Sundays felt empty and dull, because I couldn’t see her at all—I could only catch a glimpse of her in the school van.

I knew we were from the same locality, and with my strict parents, I rarely stepped outside. Most of my world was limited to home… and that short journey in the van where I could see her.

Every time I got into the van, I quietly hoped to sit next to her. I tried again and again, holding onto that small wish… but somehow, it never worked. Sometimes the van was too crowded, sometimes someone else took the seat.

And just like that, my simple wish remained unfulfilled…

Yet even those small moments—just seeing her from a distance—meant everything to me.

Sometimes, fate was kind to me… and I got the chance to be a little closer to her when she sat right in front of me. Those moments felt priceless, like time itself had slowed down just for me. I didn’t need to talk to her—just being near her was enough to make my heart feel full.

Whenever the van hit a speed breaker, my heart would skip a beat. I would quietly move, ready to protect her without her even knowing. The thought of her getting hurt scared me… because her pain would become mine. If anything ever happened to her, it would feel like I had lost a part of myself.

One day, my friend—who was also our neighbor—was about to leave for another state for his studies. Before leaving, he invited us to a dinner… and she was there too. That night felt special in a way I can’t explain. Just seeing her before going to sleep filled my heart with a quiet happiness.

Because whenever I saw her before closing my eyes, she would find her way into my dreams…

In my dreams, she loved me freely, cared for me deeply, and stayed by my side like I had always wished. In that world, there were no fears, no rules, no distance—just us.But every morning, reality returned…And I realized again—it was only a dream.

My father had a small shop, and sometimes she would come there to buy things… and those moments felt like a blessing to me. I would wait silently, hoping just to see her once. Every time she passed by my house, I would look at her from a distance, as if that one glance could make my whole day brighter.

I never had the courage to speak to her. Whenever she came close, I became quiet… my heart would start beating faster and faster, as if it was trying to say everything I couldn’t. My words would disappear, and all I could do was stand there, lost in her presence.

Sometimes, when I watched songs on YouTube, I would see an actress who looked like her. And in my mind, that actress slowly became her… because to me, no one in this world was as beautiful and gentle as she was.

Without even realizing it, I started thinking about her all the time… day and night.

She became a part of my thoughts, my dreams, my every little moment—

until one day, I understood…

I was completely lost in her.

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