Retrograde

Blood flowed down my hands as I stood shivering beneath the freezing rain, horror frozen across my face. Crimson streaks slid between my fingers, mixing with the rainwater before dripping onto the dark asphalt below. My chest rose unevenly as cold wind clawed at my soaked clothes, biting into my skin hard enough to make my teeth chatter.

I had no idea how I got there.

The rain blurred my vision while murmuring voices and hushed whispers surrounded me from every direction. They sounded distant, distorted, almost as if someone were speaking underwater. My head remained hazy, thick with a pressure that refused to let me think clearly. It felt as though my own mind was begging me not to listen.

A sharp ringing suddenly pierced my ears.

Sirens.

The sound echoed faintly through the forest before growing louder with every passing second.

Dread settled deep inside me as I slowly looked around.

There was a gun in my hand.

A black revolver.

Its metallic surface gleamed beneath flashes of lightning while my trembling fingers remained tightly wrapped around the handle. Mud and blood stained my pale hands. I stared at the weapon numbly, unable to remember where it had come from.

Or why I was holding it.

Blood trailed across the lonely road beneath my feet in thin rivers washed apart by rain. Only then did I realize where I was—a narrow road hidden deep within a forest. Towering trees surrounded me endlessly, their dark silhouettes swaying violently in the storm while the hush of rustling leaves filled the night air.

My breathing quickened.

My legs refused to move.

I looked down at myself. My oversized gray sweater clung tightly to my body from the rain while strands of black hair stuck messily against my face and neck. My shoes were soaked in mud. Tiny cuts covered my fingers where I had bitten my nails raw.

What happened to me?

I tried to remember.

Nothing.

Just emptiness.

Panic slowly began creeping beneath my skin.

Having no idea where to go or what to do, I staggered forward along the road in search of a way out. Rainwater splashed beneath my footsteps while thunder growled overhead like something alive.

Then I saw it.

A flashlight.

It rolled weakly across the ground somewhere in the distance before stopping near the edge of the road.

Hope surged through me.

Frantic, I ran toward it with the fragile belief that maybe I wasn’t alone. Maybe someone else was here too. Someone who could explain this nightmare to me.

But as I got closer, something felt wrong.

Too wrong to ignore.

My steps slowed.

There, lying on the wet road, was a woman.

Her hollow eyes stared endlessly into the darkness above while rain poured across her pale face. Her blonde hair spread around her like tangled threads soaked in crimson. Blood pooled beneath her body, slowly washing away with the storm.

For a moment, I froze completely.

Someone was dead.

Or maybe not.

Maybe this was all fake.

As I leaned closer to look at her properly, a scream tore violently from my throat.

There was a bullet lodged in her chest.

But that wasn’t why I screamed.

Why was I holding a gun?

My breathing became shallow.

Is this some kind of prank?

“Yes… yes… there has to be a camera somewhere, right?”

My voice sounded broken.

I looked around hysterically, searching for something—anything. A hidden camera. A microphone. Someone laughing behind the trees.

Please.

“There has to be someone here…”

Lightning flashed across the forest for a split second, illuminating endless empty trees.

Nothing else.

No cameras.

No people.

No answers.

Every last bit of hope inside me shattered.

A sudden laugh escaped my lips.

Weak at first.

Then louder.

“Oh… haha… why am I so stupid?”

Relief flooded through me as I pressed a trembling hand against my forehead.

“This is a dream.”

Of course it was.

That had to be the answer.

No sane person would suddenly wake up in the middle of a forest beside a corpse with blood on their hands.

I laughed again, louder this time.

“I must have lost my mind for not realizing it sooner…”

Rain poured harder around me while thunder cracked violently overhead.

“This is a dream… yes… a dream…”

I kept laughing until I suddenly choked on air.

Cough.

Cough.

The laughter slowly died in my throat.

For one brief moment, happiness filled me.

If this was a dream, then none of this was real.

The blood wasn’t real.

The corpse wasn’t real.

The gun wasn’t real.

Then another thought struck me.

How do I wake up from this?

The smile faded from my face instantly.

The night only grew darker around me. Somewhere deep within the forest, animals howled into the storm while unseen creatures moved between the trees. Snakes hissed softly through the undergrowth, hidden beneath shadows and rain.

The entire forest suddenly felt alive.

Watching me.

Waiting.

I wrapped my arms tightly around myself as cold wind sliced through my soaked clothes. My heartbeat echoed loudly inside my skull while panic slowly returned.

How do you wake up from a nightmare?

I paced back and forth desperately, biting my nails until blood seeped through my fingertips.

Think.

Think.

There has to be a way.

Then suddenly—

An idea came to me.

My movements stopped.

Slowly, I turned toward the dead woman again.

Rain dripped from my eyelashes as I stared at her motionless body lying beneath the storm.

“So that’s how it is…”

My voice barely rose above a whisper.

Looks like she was trapped in this nightmare too.

“Poor soul…”

A strange giggle escaped my lips.

“Kekeke…”

Another flash of lightning illuminated the road, casting twisted shadows across the trees.

“Hahahah…”

The laughter grew louder.

More unstable.

That means…

That means…

My eyes slowly lowered toward the gun still clutched in my hand.

“I just have to die too…”

Somewhere beyond the trees, sirens finally reached me