Chapter 1
Because Of What I Do: Michael
Chapter 1
Michael
Today was going to be a hard day for the Bowen family. As I pulled into the driveway I could see my brother on the front porch waiting with our dog, Tasha.
“Hey, Bro!” I shouted through the truck window.
“Hello kid.” He responded and walked towards me.
I teased him, “When are you getting rid of that stupid cowboy hat?”
“You’re just jealous. I’m telling you, the girls like it.” He said, grinning.
I laughed and shook my head in disbelief when I heard Mom shout, “Michael come in hurry, dinner is ready!”
As I sat at the dinner table with my family, I struggled to find the right words to tell them about my plans. I know they won’t be happy with my decision but it’s my life, I get to choose what I want to do. I am nearly twenty five years old, I am a man, they have to understand. My thoughts were interrupted by my older brother.
He said, “I have an announcement. I have decided to purchase a condo in town.”
Dad said, “That’s great news but you sure it’s not too soon? You’ve just started the business, maybe you should wait a year or two and see how things go financially.”
He responded, “Don’t worry Dad, I got it under control. I’m not going to overspend and get anything extravagant. It’s a waste of money to pay rent. I need an investment.”
I broke in, “I think it’s great news bro.” I smiled at him.
Mom said, “Well, if you need any help financially, you just let us know and I can help you pick out some new furniture, if you like?”
“That would be great Mom, thank you.”
She smiled and said, “I’m just glad you won’t be moving far away, you know I worried when you started traveling some.”
“I won’t be too far Mom, just in town.”
“So, boys...anyone dating someone special yet?”
I said, “Not him, he scares them all away with that dumb cowboy hat of his,” I joked.
He swatted the back of my head, “Ok, kid, I think it’s time you shared what’s going on in your life.” He looked at me and nudged me to speak up.
I had confided in my big brother my whole life. I always looked up to him. I looked to my father and said, “Yeah, I need to talk to you all about something important.”
Mom broke in, “You met a girl, didn’t you?” she said excited.
“No, ma. It’s about my career.” The table got very quiet. “I have made a decision, I am moving up to detective and will be working in the narcotics division for the FBI.”
“Michael, please dear, we have discussed this before, you know how your father and I feel about it. It’s too dangerous. Isn’t it enough to be a police officer? You risk your life already, I just can’t imagine…”
“Ma, it’s done. I’ve accepted the position…”
Dad broke in, “Son, you know, we love you and we worry…”
“I know, Dad,” I tried to stay calm.
My brother interrupted, “Let’s hear him out, this is what he’s chosen, we have to support him.”
I continued, “As far as anyone else in the family or friends will know, I will be changing career paths to become a traveling fireman. This will explain why I’m not on the police force any longer and why I will be gone for a few months at a time.” I watched as the tears came down my mother’s cheeks.
I chose my words carefully and only shared the smallest details with them. I know she can’t handle the truth about what I will be doing. “Ma, I am going to make a difference in this world. I am going to make it a better place to live in. I’m good at this and….I will be fine.” I went over to hug her.
Dad asked, “Will we know where you are? How long will you be gone?”
“No, unfortunately, I can’t share that information. Some jobs may be just a few weeks, some a few months. This can never be discussed with anyone else, it would put my life in jeopardy. We can not share my decision with anyone.”
Dad said, “We know, son. We are not happy with the decision but we are proud of you.” Mom shook her head in agreement but still cried.
“I was thinking about getting rid of my apartment. Since I will be coming and going so much, I thought I might use my old room for a bit in between jobs, till I figure it all out.”
“Of course,” Mom looked at me and smiled.
I knew right then and there that I would never be able to discuss my job with them again in detail, I hated to see her so upset. I would make light of each case, for their sake. I myself knew better, having completed the training. I knew my life would be in danger. I knew I would learn to live two separate lives. It excites me, I can’t wait to start.
My brother said “Kid, you know you can share it all with me, right? I can handle it, I would never tell anyone your secrets.”
“I know. I will be leaving next week, it should be a simple job to start. Some idiots selling cocaine on the corners. I won’t always be able to be reached, I can’t have my personal cell phone on me. I will text you the number of my supervisor, Jim Blakely, in case there’s an emergency. He will always know how to reach me.”
“Ok, kid. I’m proud of what you are doing.” We hugged.
I suggested, “Let’s go out Saturday, before I leave, we could go to the club. I definitely need to get laid.”
“Sounds good to me,” he smiled as he hopped into his truck.
On the drive home my mind raced about my future. I was longing for something more in my life. Being a cop was great but working for the FBI was intriguing for sure. I’m not afraid, I don’t know why. I believe this is my calling, this is what I’m meant to do. I have been training for it for awhile now, keeping that from my parents was hard. I can’t wait to start my first official case.
*****
I grabbed some boxes from the local liquor store before going home and would spend the rest of my night packing and planning for my future.
I spoke to Jim and was debriefed on next week’s case in more detail. My cover name would be Nathan. It would be strange to be called something other than Michael.
I looked in the mirror at myself. I would need to stop shaving now, I need to look scruffy to fit in with the others. It’s been several months since I cut my hair. It is definitely longer than I liked, but I need to look the part of a drug dealer.
I grabbed my weights and began doing my routine weightlifting. I started practicing out loud, “Hey, I’m Nathan.” I needed to get comfortable saying it out loud.
“Yo, I’m Nathan....Hi, I’m Nathan.” I laughed at myself, -I sound stupid.
