What is your opinion?
outstanding
"I'm excited by the premise, but even more excited to have found writing worth reading. This author gives a damn about the little things and it shows - excellent craftsmanship made this a joy to read - the bonus is, the story is well thought-out, well-developed. Great work author!"
Good Start
"You laid out a solid foundation for the rest of the story. Is this a summary or prologue or the writing style you'll use for the whole book? I liked the descriptions of the characters and their tattoos... tough female characters always a plus. Look forward to reading more and giving more thorough feedback if you like"
Almost...
"It seems to me that you have a good story here, but you're not doing enough with it. This is just my opinion, but I thought that it looked more like an outline than an actual story. If you delve deep into this story, create characters and lands and scenes it will make it far easier connect with and much more powerful. As it is, it seems to be only a shell of what it could be. But I am sensing so much potential. I hope that makes sense, and I hope that this review is helpful. Your plot is great, you just need more for the reader to grab onto. Good luck in the contest, my friend."
And So It Begins...
"This is an exciting "teaser" of a story (clearly the Prologue of a much longer work) firmly in the mold of Tolkein and C.S. Lewis, yet with a nice original touch as well. It opens with an breezy, epic narration of events past, and the wizard who came forth to reveal the six people with the power to defeat the evil tyrant Aezrath. Cleverly, each hero/heroine is tied via a tattoo to one of the world's three moons, giving him/her the power to control one of the elements. The war is won (all as a backstory) and peace restored, but the true story begins in the "future" (or our present), when our protagonist finds the book and realizes that she must assemble three more heroes for the second-coming of Aezrath. While some of this is conventional enough, the storytelling itself is inspired and done with fluency and style. I like how the prologue fades right into the 'real' story, and gives us just enough to go on before plunging us into the protagonist's quest. The danger of a work like this is its sheer size, and I am anxious to see what the author does with this, and how she (I think ) can balance the Tolkein mythological mode with modern-day storytelling. Some of the names seem a little sub-Tolkeinish, and could maybe be worked on to give them more life of their own. But this aside, I think this might become a very fresh and unique take on epic fantasy, and I was very intrigued by this first look. Keep writing and godspeed on your quest!"
