1 ~ Heart
The heavy black fabric of the University of Sydney graduation gown was a blessing.
A velvet weight.
A strategic shield.
Sienna stood anchored to the cold tile, her five-foot-four frame caught beneath the unforgiving fluorescent lights of the university restroom. Her fingers spread over her stomach, smoothing the stiff polyester in a slow, absent-minded motion.
Checking.
Nothing.
At five weeks, there was no visible sign.
Only a private sensation deep inside her—a quiet knowing she hadn’t yet seen an ultrasound.
She leaned closer to the mirror.
A thick cascade of copper-reddish-brown hair slipped over her shoulder, caramel strands catching the harsh light like burnished silk. Her honey-brown eyes stared back at her.
She looked the same.
That was the strangest part.
The heavy timber door swung open.
Colour entered the room.
Damien.
Damo-babes.
He didn’t simply walk into a room.
He arrived.
His black academic gown fluttered behind him like a velvet cape as his five-foot-nine, lean frame crossed the sterile tiles. His Japanese and Māori heritage gave his face an almost sculpted quality—sharp jaw, striking eyes, immaculate skin—the kind of face that could command attention beneath the neon lights of Sydney’s drag scene without asking permission.
He adjusted the satin hood across his chest with a manicured flick.
Silver rings clicked against one another.
“Oh, look at you!” he declared. “The copper goddess is ready to claim her scroll.”
Sienna managed a smile.
Damien came closer and straightened the hood.
“Honestly, thank God the Faculty of Arts chose these colours. They bring out the gold in your eyes. Flawless.”
“Thanks, Damo-babes.”
She looked at him through the mirror.
“Look at you, though. A whole Bachelor of Business Management. Who knew my favourite person would become a corporate mastermind?”
“Please, darling.” He gave her an exaggerated look. “I’m putting the style into compliance.”
She laughed softly.
“While you were creating masterpieces in those Visual Arts studios, I was calculating exactly how much we can charge for them when I eventually open your first gallery.”
“Eventually?”
“Obviously. I’m thinking of Sydney. White walls. Terrible coffee. Ridiculous prices.”
That earned a real laugh.
Then Damien’s expression changed.
His eyes caught hers in the mirror.
The performance disappeared.
He stepped closer and lowered his voice.
“How are we feeling?”
A pause.
“And by we, I mean you and the little secret operative.”
Sienna’s smile faded.
“The little secret operative is good.”
Her palm settled instinctively over her stomach.
“I’m okay. Just tired.”
She swallowed.
“And terrified Mum and Dad are going to notice I’m skipping the champagne later.”
“Leave the parents to me.”
Damien squeezed her shoulder.
“I will personally knock over a catering tray, start an argument about market mergers, or fake a minor corporate emergency the second those champagne bottles come out.”
Sienna turned from the mirror.
“You’d do that?”
“For you?”
He placed a hand over his heart.
“I’d commit accounting fraud.”
She snorted.
“You’re ridiculous.”
“And you’re graduating.”
His smile softened.
“That’s what matters.”
Outside the restroom, the university continued without them.
Footsteps.
Laughter.
Camera flashes.
Families calling names.
Her parents were somewhere inside the Great Hall, proudly waiting for their daughter.
They didn’t know.
They didn’t know about the positive test.
They didn’t know about the future that had already begun growing beneath the gown.
And they certainly didn’t know about the messages Sienna had deleted from her phone weeks ago.
Rewind the tape.
Three weeks earlier.
A different bathroom.
A different life.
The floor of the Newtown bathroom had been cold beneath Sienna’s knees.
Outside the frosted window, King Street traffic carried on with its usual indifference.
Cars.
Buses.
People going somewhere.
Inside, time had stopped.
Five minutes.
That was all it had taken.
Five minutes of staring at a plastic stick and refusing to believe what her eyes were telling her.
Two crimson lines.
Positive.
Sienna rested her forehead against the basin.
Her copper hair fell forward, hiding her face.
Five weeks.
The calculation landed with brutal precision.
Late March.
Those final weeks when Cody Blackwood had already begun retreating from her.
I need space.
I need a break.
This isn’t about you.
Except it had always been about her.
At least, that was what it felt like now.
Her phone buzzed against the bathmat.
Damo-babes.
She stared at the screen before answering.
“Babe,” Damien said immediately. “You disappeared after the arts seminar. Where are you?”
“I’m home.”
“You sound strange.”
Sienna closed her eyes.
“Damo...”
“What happened?”
She looked at the test again.
“The test.”
Silence.
Then, very quietly—
“Two lines?”
“Two lines.”
Her voice broke.
“He left me empty, Damo.”
A breath.
“He walked away to find his space, and he left me with this.”
Damien’s voice changed.
Not louder.
Stronger.
“Listen to me, Sienna Vance.”
She sat on the floor.
“Cody Blackwood doesn’t get to own this story.”
Sienna said nothing.
“Remember the Ampol station.”
Her eyes closed.
She remembered.
The car.
The other woman.
Cody’s betrayal displayed in broad daylight.
The humiliation.
The moment Damien had seen it before Sienna had been able to make sense of what she was looking at.
“He doesn’t get another piece of you,” Damien continued. “Not your peace. Not your future. Not this baby.”
Sienna’s hand moved over her stomach.
The fear was still there.
But beneath it—
Something else.
Resolve.
“I know.”
Her voice was barely audible.
“He’s eliminated.”
A pause.
“For good.”
“That’s my girl.”
She heard the click of Damien’s laptop closing.
“I’m coming over.”
“Damo—”
“No arguments.”
“But—”
“We’re going to map this out.”
His voice softened.
“You finish your degree. I finished mine. We figure out the babies. We figure out your parents. We figure everything out.”
A beat.
“And if the universe wants to make this difficult?”
Sienna wiped beneath her eye.
“What then?”
“Then we regret starting with us.”
A small laugh escaped her.
“You’re insane.”
“Correct.”
His tone brightened.
“And fabulous.”
But producing that future meant navigating a volatile new climate inside her own body.
The nausea came without warning.
The exhaustion arrived like an ambush.
And beneath it all was something Sienna hadn’t expected.
Longing.
A restless, physical hunger for intimacy she had nowhere to put.
She had loved Cody.
She had trusted Cody.
Now even the memory of being touched by him felt complicated.
So when she walked through the Newtown front door one ordinary Tuesday afternoon, she wasn’t prepared for what waited on the other side.
Her keys landed in the bowl.
She heard something.
A muffled sound from the lounge room.
She stopped.
Another.
Then laughter.
Sienna slowly rounded the corner.
And froze.
Damien.
On the velvet couch.
With a gorgeous male company.
Very intimate company.
Her eyes widened.
Damien looked over.
Their eyes met.
For one extraordinary second, neither of them moved.
Then Damien gave her a perfectly unapologetic wink.
Sienna’s jaw dropped.
She backed away.
“Absolutely not.”
Damien’s laughter followed her down the hallway.
She slammed her bedroom door and leaned against it.
For three seconds she stared into nothing.
Then she burst out laughing.
A proper laugh.
The kind that hurt her stomach.
The kind she hadn’t realised she needed.
“Fuck.”
She covered her face.
Of all the days.
Of all the houses.
Of all the possible moments to discover that Damien’s private life was apparently thriving while hers had become an emotional desert.
She laughed again.
Maybe that was the first crack in the darkness.
Not healing.
Not yet.
Just laughter.
But sometimes that was how a person began finding their way back.
Fast forward.
Back to the present.
The organ notes swelled through the Great Hall.
Sienna adjusted her mortarboard.
The reflection staring back at her looked composed.
Almost convincing.
“Right.”
She tossed her copper hair over one shoulder.
“Let’s go get these degrees.”
Damien offered his arm.
“That’s my girl.”
They walked out together.
Ten minutes later, the procession began.
The Great Hall filled with black gowns, proud parents and flashing cameras. The pipe organ rolled through the space, its deep notes travelling beneath Sienna’s feet.
She found her parents in the third row.
Her mother was already crying.
Her father was waving far too enthusiastically.
Sienna smiled.
For the first time that morning, the smile reached all the way through her.
Whatever happened next, they were her people.
Her home.
She stepped into the aisle.
And then she saw him.
Cody Blackwood.
Near the executive and alumni seating.
Six-foot-four.
Impossibly composed.
Corporate connections surrounding him as though he belonged there.
His green eyes moved lazily across the graduating class.
Then stopped.
On her.
For one suspended moment, everything inside Sienna went still.
Green eyes.
The exact shade her son would one day inherit.
Daniel.
Her future daughter beside him.
Daniella.
She didn’t know those names yet.
Not officially.
But somehow, she already carried the shape of them.
Cody’s gaze remained on her.
Sienna didn’t blink.
Didn’t smile.
Didn’t look away in embarrassment.
She simply continued walking.
Past him.
Straight toward the stage.
As though he were nothing more than another face in a crowded hall.
A man who had once occupied almost every corner of her world.
Now?
Just history.
She felt the smallest flutter beneath her gown.
Her hand almost moved toward her stomach.
Almost.
Instead, she kept walking.
Chin high.
Shoulders back.
The future waiting ahead.
Cody Blackwood was a chapter she had not finished understanding.
But he was no longer holding the pen.
And that was the beginning.
