Chapter 1
"Tell me that again."
My voice isn't as loud as I thought it would be.
When Zane answers, he doesn't look at me."I told you, Lyra, it's done."
The words don't feel right in my chest;
they're like a sharp object slipping between my ribs when it wasn't supposed to.
I move forward.
"No." Tell me. "Look at me."
He finally does.
Blue-gray eyes. It's cold. I've never seen anything so empty.
Don't fight.
Not even when his first full shift wolf was about to break it.
This is even worse.
After that, it's quiet.
He says, "I'm not taking the bond."
My wolf is cold.
Not mad.
Don't fight. In other words.
It's just hearing as if it doesn't understand what he's saying.
I blink. Just one blink.
Once more."I say, "You can't."
Stillness.
Zane lets out a slow breath, as if I were the cause of his trouble.
"I already have."
Just a little, the room leans. Not enough to get me out. Enough to make me feel that way all over.
Like when the quiet was broken.
He can see the members of the Frostfang council as shadows cut into stone behind him.
Taking note. Not to stop him. Not a single move.
That's when I understand. Something small and mean:
It wasn't a surprise.
It was agreed upon.
My throat gets tight.
I say, "You said we were meant to be together."
Zane's jaw gets tight.
"I made a mistake."
That's it.
Not mad.
I don't know what to say.
It wasn't even regret.
That's right. Just...
Like I'm a mistake that he needs to fix.
My wolf is really lost and is pushing forward inside me. It pulls at the thread that binds us together.
The thread is still alive.
Not strong.
Ripped.
"But there.""You feel it," I say quickly as I get closer. You also feel it. "You don't just wipe it off like that."
Something shines in his eyes for the first time.
Not very nice.
Not love.
Being unsure.
But it goes away so quickly that I think I dreamed it.
He says, "I don't feel anything now."
That one hurts a lot.
I get to know Zane Nightclaw.
The way his breath changes when he's lying down lets me know.
His fingers twitch when he wants to say something but isn't ready to say it.
However...
Not at all.
Just trick them.
Just the distance.
Nothing but the end.
I grip my hands together.I tell you to stop lying.
An elder on the board clears his throat.
"This is a pack thing." This is what the Alpha said:
Choosen.
The word hurts less than being turned down.
In other words, I had no idea about the choice.
I see Zane again.
Who?
quiet
He then says it.
"Seris Vale."
It helps that the name is good.
It hurts.
Vale books.
Daughter of the Soviet Union. Coalition government. Bloodline of pure wolves. Great picture.
The ideal replacement.
I laugh for a short time before I can stop myself.
"Is that all?" My voice is shaking now. "Ten years, Zane."
Ten years later, I'm replaced like I wasn't even there."
He sees something sharp flash across his face.
Again, gone too quickly.
He tells her, "You were never nothing."
That almost kills me.
Not quite.
I get it, though.
Since "were" means "in the past,"
My wolf isn't happy and is pushing against my chest.
It doesn't get this.
Not me either.
I move forward.
"Then tell me about it."
Zane turns his back to you.
That's not as bad as being turned down.
Because he can't look at me while he hurts me "He says, "I can't."
A whisper.
Not much.
But it closes everything down.
I see him.
I fixed the guy. After his first rib was broken.
I helped the boy get out of a lost fight when his wolf was almost gone.
I had faith in something bigger than myself at Alpha.
My voice gets weaker.
"You're not going to let me have that?"
He doesn't answer.
Silence is the answer.
Not a loud noise, but something inside me breaks. Not in a big way.
Not loud.
Like a thread that breaks at the end.
One time, my cat whines.
After that, it's over.
The bond talks back.
I can feel it
Not at all.
But it's getting weaker.
Like I'm letting something out.
I took a step back in shock.
Zane can see.
Just for a second. He turns his head a little for a second.
It looks like he wants to put out an arm.
He doesn't, though.
He is stuck somewhere.
He says, "Lyra."
"He says my name wrong now."
Wasn't it his?
I stand up straight.
Do not let them see you fall.
That's not my thought.
It comes from the wolf.
Or maybe what's left of it.
I give one nod.
Take your time.
In control.
"That makes sense," I say.
Zane's eyes get a little smaller.
"No, you don't—""Yes," I answered.
That stops him for a second.
Okay.
I pull back again.I'm sure I dated a man for ten years who couldn't stand to look at me while he threw me away.
He was gasping at his back.
Making a move.
Someone on the council told him something in a whisper.
Zane clenches his teeth.
"Lyra," he warns her.
I smile.
It doesn't seem real.
"I'll do it."
That makes him happy.
I see it.
For a moment
He was going to make a case.
Important news.
Maybe even anger.
Not this one.
It's not an acceptance.
I look at the door.
I put out my hand to touch the frame.
After that, I quit.
Just a moment.
I don't look back.
I say, "Don't lose her the way you lost me if it makes you happy."
Be quiet.
Nothing.
That's the last answer.
I leave.
---
It's too bright in the hall.
Too neat.
Way too often.
It felt like something that should have lived a lifetime had just died in that room.
I walk with confidence.
Until the end.
Then my legs almost give way.
I hold on to the wall.
A sharp gasp for air.
Once more, my wolf comes to life, confused, hurt, and antsy.
There is no tie.
Not a hook.
Just... no one knew where Zane was.
I rest my face on the cold stone.
Take a deep breath.
Two.
Three.
After that I laugh again.
Short.
Broken up.
I say in a low voice, "Ten years." "He couldn't even say goodbye properly."
I think I hear footsteps behind me.
I become stiff.
I slowly turn around.
A guard.
Not you, someone else.
Bearer of a word.
He bows a little.
"Lyra Rising Moon?
I quickly wipe my face and say.
"Yes."
He gives me a black package that is sealed.
The letter A.
The mark of Frostfang.
It makes my stomach hurt.
"What is that?" I asked.
He waits.
Afterward:
There is an invitation to Alpha Zane Nightclaw's bonding ceremony.
The world stops again.
It takes a while for my fingers to move.
Okay, then.
Take your time.
Be careful.
It might bite me.
It's easy to break the lock.
Way too simple.
There is one line inside.
One line that makes me feel cold:
**You must be present. "Only paired bonds."
It hurts to breathe.
Only for couples.
I squeeze the paper together with my fingers.
Then I see something else.
There was a smaller seal inside the paper.
Not the same crest.
Do not Frostfang.
Black wolf's seal of the north.
The symbol of an enemy pack.
My heart rate changes.
Take your time.
IMPORTANT!
I took it out.
One more row.
Short.
Simple.
** "If you go alone... don't go." **
The signature is not on file.
I already know that mark, though.
That sign is well known.
I'm Kael Stormfang.
For the first time since Zane turned me down, my wolf moves.
Not pain.
It's not confusion.
An interest.
That's what scares me the most.
As time goes on, I start to see something—
It's more than just an invite.
It's a choice.
And in the distance, on a ship I haven't even seen...
Two Alphas can't wait to see what I turn into.
I hold on to the letters tighter.
At that point, the lights in the hallway flash once.
Just once.
A low howl came from far away and rolled over the pack grounds.
Not from my bag.
Not Zane's wolves.
From somewhere else.
Keeping an eye on something.
Also, I swear—
It sounds like my name being called.
