Chapter 1
Mera naam Samir Dhurve hai. Kuch log mujhe Uxiro ke naam se bhi jaante hain.
Agar meri kahani ki baat karun, to mera janam kisi bade shehar ki chamak-dhamak mein nahi hua tha.
Na photos, na celebration party.
Mera welcome bahut simple tha.
Jab main paida hua, meri dadi ne gaon mein mithai nahi baanti, kyunki paise nahi the.
Unhone logon ko ek-ek chamach chini di.
Logon ke liye woh bas chini thi.
Par mere liye woh meri kahani ka pehla sentence tha.
Zindagi shuruaat mein tumhe kam deti hai, taaki tum seekho ki khushi cheezon se nahi, nazariye se banti hai.
Ghar chhota tha.
Zaruratein badi thi.
Par sapne bhi tab chhote the, isliye tension bhi chhoti thi.
Main mitti mein khelta tha.
Kheton ki khushboo, baarish ka paani aur thandi hawaayein hi meri duniya thi.
Mere paas toys nahi the, lekin imagination full HD mein chalti thi.
Main doston ke ghar jaakar unke toys se khel leta tha.
Unka TV dekh leta tha.
Unke papa ke phone mein games khel leta tha.
Kabhi chori nahi ki.
Bas thodi der ke liye unki duniya udhaar le leta tha.
Jiske paas sab kuch hota hai, usse aksar value nahi hoti. Aur jiske paas kam hota hai, woh har cheez ki kadar karna seekh jaata hai.
Ek din papa ek pyari si chidiya laaye.
Main uske saath khelta tha.
Use dekh kar khushi hoti thi.
Do din baad woh gayab ho gayi.
Subah pata chala ki kal raat ka khana wahi thi.
Us din bachpan ka ek tukda toot gaya.
Zindagi tumhe bina warning ke reality sikha deti hai. Aur innocence kab chali jaati hai, pata bhi nahi chalta.
School mein main bahut shy tha.
Zyada bolta nahi tha.
Class mein bachche haste the.
Main unhe dekhta tha aur samajhne ki koshish karta tha.
Main duniya mein loud nahi tha.
Par mere dimaag mein awaazein hamesha chalti rehti thi.
Jo log chup rehte hain na, woh sochna band nahi karte. Woh bas bolna kam kar dete hain.
Phir meri zindagi mein phone aaya.
Pehle keypad phone.
Phir Jio Phone.
Internet khula.
Aur pehli baar samajh aaya ki gaon ke bahar bhi ek poori duniya hai.
Online dost bane.
Aise log mile jo mujhe judge nahi karte the.
Screen ke peeche main thoda zyada confident ho jaata tha.
Kabhi-kabhi insaan real duniya mein khud ko nahi dhoondh pata, par kahin aur jaakar apni awaaz dhoondh leta hai.
Waqt aage badhta gaya.
Main bada hota gaya.
Par ek cheez peeche reh gayi — direction.
12th ke baad sab log aage badh rahe the.
Koi job mein tha.
Koi college mein.
Koi apne goals ke peeche bhaag raha tha.
Aur main...
Main compare karne laga.
Aur compare karte-karte khud ko kam samajhne laga.
Par ek ajeeb baat thi.
Main life mein confused tha.
Lekin stories ke mamle mein kabhi confused nahi tha.
Log future ke plans bana rahe the.
Main scenes imagine kar raha tha.
Log career choose kar rahe the.
Main characters bana raha tha.
Tab dheere-dheere samajh aaya...
Tum sabke jaise nahi ho, iska matlab yeh nahi ki tum galat ho. Ho sakta hai tumhara rasta bas alag ho.
Mere paas paise kam the.
Phone bhi der se mila.
Toys udhaar ke mile.
Direction bhi der se mili.
Par ek cheez kabhi nahi gayi — chhoti baaton mein khush rehna.
Baarish ki khushboo.
Naya pen.
Raat ki shanti.
Ek accha gaana.
Ya phir ek naya idea.
Ye cheezein mujhe utni hi khushi deti thi jitni shayad kisi aur ko ek badi car deti hogi.
Jis din tum bina wajah khush rehna seekh jaoge, us din duniya tumse sab kuch cheen kar bhi tumhe hara nahi paayegi.
Aaj main perfect nahi hoon.
Rich nahi hoon.
Settled bhi nahi hoon.
Par main rukka hua bhi nahi hoon.
Main seekh gaya hoon ki log kya kar rahe hain, woh unki story hai.
Aur main kya banna chahta hoon, woh meri.
Log tez bhaag rahe the.
Main dheere chal raha tha.
Kai baar laga ki main peeche reh gaya hoon.
Par phir samajh aaya...
Race shayad meri thi hi nahi.
Har baar jab gira, dard hua.
Par har baar uthte waqt ek naya version khada hua.
Maine seekha—
Zindagi tumhe seedha rasta nahi deti. Woh tumhe ghuma kar tumhara asli rasta dikhati hai.
Agar sab kuch tumhare hisaab se hota, to tum woh insaan kabhi nahi bante jo struggle se strong bana.
Isliye shayad rukna kabhi solution nahi hota.
Rukne se bas kahani adhuri reh jaati hai.
Aur adhuri kahaniyon ka bojh insaan zindagi bhar uthata hai.
Isliye main abhi bhi seekh raha hoon.
Gir raha hoon.
Uth raha hoon.
Aur likh raha hoon.
Kyuki meri kahani abhi khatam nahi hui hai.
— Samir Dhurve (Uxiro)
