The Disappearing We

The sun is already high in the sky! mother snapped. “Get up, Eun! Your first-semester exams are only three months away.

“Mom, let me sleep just a little longer,”Eun said, as she hid her face beneath a thin blanket.

Then mother forcefully pulling the thin blanket away from Eun's face and tugging her ear. "Get up, my sleeping queen! Now, off you go to wash that beautiful face of yours before your highness forgets how to open her eyes."

Eun groaned, rubbing her heavy eyelids as she slowly dragged her feet toward the washroom. The cool water splashed against her skin, instantly snapping her awake. As she stepped back into her room, wiping her damp face with a soft towel, her gaze accidentally landed on her study desk.

Looking at the chaotic, towering piles of textbooks, a wave of sadness washed over her. She stared at them quietly. Her mind drifted back to how effortless studying used to be for her—she was always the topper, the girl who understood everything in a flash. But ever since high school started, everything had turned upside down. The syllabus felt like an untamable monster, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't keep her notes organized anymore. She felt completely lost in her own books, a stranger to her old brilliant self.

Suddenly, a realization hit her like a lightning bolt. Her pen dropped from her hand. *The new tutor!*

Eun dashed out of her room and rushed straight down to the room. "Mom! Isn't the new tutor supposed to come to our house today?"

Her mother looked up from her office bag, quickly tucking in some files while glancing at her wristwatch. She gave a hurried but approving nod. "Yes, he is. His name is Nick, and he will be here around afternoon. You better be on your best behavior today. The boy is incredibly brilliant—he just got accepted into the University of Texas at Dallas (UTD) for his higher studies. He is only here for his summer vacation, so make sure you learn as much as you can from him."

Anyway, Eun entered college later that morning. As she walked down the crowded corridor, she was completely lost in her thoughts, her eyes fixed on the floor.

She was well-known on campus, not just because she won almost every competition she entered, but because she was, quite naturally, the ultimate crush of the entire college. Dozens of eyes followed her every step, but Eun was oblivious to it all.

"Guess who, my beautiful topper!"

Suddenly, two warm hands clamped tightly over Eun’s eyes from behind, making her stumble forward. Before she could even gasp, a familiar weight crashed into her back as Jeni threw her arms around her neck, giggling loudly.

Jeni was Eun's best friends in high school and complete opposite—outspoken, a hopeless romantic, and always locked and loaded with a teasing remark that's all students thought.

She didn't care that half the boys in the hallway were staring at them; her only mission today was to disrupt Eun's serious mood.

Eun pulled Jeni's hands away from her face, letting out a relieved sigh. "Jeni! You almost gave me a heart attack. Stop acting like a crazy child in public."

"Oh, come on, live a little!" Jeni linked her arm through Eun's as they started walking again.

Eun started telling Jeni about her new tutor, Nick, mentioning that he was actually two years younger than her.

The moment she heard this, Jeni playfully exclaimed, Jeni’s eyes twinkling with curiosity. “Well then, looks like I’ve found my brother-in-law!”

Eun gave her a gentle scolding and said, “What are you even talking about? You can’t just fall in love with anyone and everyone. And You know me—I prefer focusing on my career over romance. ”

With a subtle, knowing smile, Jeni replied, “Love doesn’t exactly ring a bell before entering someone’s life, you know? It just happens out of nowhere.”

In the afternoon, Nick came to Eun’s house. Eun’s parents spoke with Nick. They liked him as a teacher. Eun’s dad told him to start teaching from today, and Nick agreed as well.

“Assalamu Alaikum, Nick. How are you?” Eun said.

“Walaikum Assalam! I am fine, and you?” Nick replied .

Eun replied, “I am fine too.”

"So, how are your studies going lately?" Nick asked gently, looking at her with genuine curiosity.

Eun looked down at her hands, a hint of disappointment and frustration washing over her face. "Honestly... it's just okay. I feel like I can't manage anything anymore."

Nick let out a soft, understanding chuckle, a warm smile spreading across his face. "It sounds like a bit of depression has been kicking in, hasn't it? Well, you don't need to worry about that anymore. Now that I am here, we will handle it together. No more stress, okay? So, tell me, which subject do you want to start with today?"

Hearing his reassuring words, Eun squared her shoulders and squared her jaw, pretending to be full of confidence as she said, “Physics!”

As Nick smiled and opened the heavy textbook,

Eun watched him quietly from across the desk. *Wow, he is actually so friendly and easy to talk to,* she thought to herself, her initial anxiety completely melting away. *Let's see how he actually teaches.*

To her surprise, Nick didn't just read from the pages. He explained the complex physics formulas in a completely different, visual way, using simple everyday examples. For the first time in months, the difficult topics felt incredibly easy and clear to Eun.

When it was time to leave, Nick gave her a gentle smile and said, “You are actually my first student, so I was trying my best to teach without any nervousness. Did I succeed?”

Eun smiled warmly and replied, “Yes, absolutely!”Thank you. I’ll be back the day after tomorrow. Make sure you complete everything I taught you today,” Nick said. “Okay,” Eun replied.

After Nick left, Eun was overjoyed because she could understand so clearly today. She literally danced with joy as she went to her mother and said, “Mom, Nick taught me so well! The things I was struggling to understand, he solved them so easily. Plus, he is incredibly polite. At first glance, I honestly thought he was a bit of a fool, but later I realized he is actually quite intelligent.”

“Thank goodness we finally found a good teacher,” Eun’s mother replied. “Since he is on his summer vacation right now, you can study with him as much as you want. Now go, get back to your desk and study!”

In the evening, Eun called Jeni and told her everything about Nick.

After hearing the whole story, Jeni excitedly exclaimed, “Oh wow, sis, he is such a massive green flag! First student, first girlfriend, first wife—man, that is absolutely perfect!”

Hearing this, Eun scolded Jeni again and snapped, “What do you mean ‘first wife’, huh? How many wives do you think he needs?

And I am just his first student, okay? There is nothing going on between us, and nothing ever will! You are literally crazy. Sis, why on earth are you studying science? You should have taken love literature instead! Anyway, bye, I need to study now.”

The next morning, Eun woke up very early, performed her prayers, and immediately sat down to study. When her parents saw this, they were utterly shocked—their daughter was actually studying first thing in the morning!

But Eun was completely oblivious to her surroundings; she was entirely focused on her work because she had to hand over her completed lessons the very next day.

Later, sitting at the dining table, her parents jokingly said, “What kind of magic did Nick work in just one single day? Our daughter has completely lost touch with the world; she is totally lost in her books!”

Eun spent the rest of the day just like any other normal day. However, since their high school was closed for the summer vacation, Eun and a few of her friends had planned to hang out today. They went out and had an absolute blast all day long.

Around evening, while heading back home, Eun suddenly stopped dead in her tracks near a street corner. Through the quiet twilight haze, she spotted Nick, and the sight instantly took her breath away.

He was standing right beneath a tall lamp post. The warm, golden glow of the light cascaded down upon him like a spotlight, illuminating the sharp edges of his jawline and making his hair shimmer with a soft amber tint. He was carefully holding the elbow of an elderly lady, patiently guiding her across the busy street.

Eun stood frozen, unable to tear her eyes away. In that flickering light and shadow, Nick didn't look like an ordinary college student anymore; he looked like a breathtaking prince stepped straight out of a classic romance novel. His face carried a smile so gentle, so pure with kindness, that it made Eun's chest tighten with a strange, unfamiliar warmth. She had never seen anyone look so effortlessly beautiful just by being kind.

And then, just as she was staring at him with a racing heart, Nick turned his head. Through the golden dust under the lamp post, his intense eyes met hers.

After guiding the old lady to a safe place, Nick walked over to Eun. “Hey there! What are you doing here at this hour?” he asked.

Eun replied, “Well, today was our last class before the break, so my friends and I were having some fun. That’s why I’m a bit late getting home.”

“Alright then, let me drop you home,” Nick said.

Eun immediately objected, “But your house and mine are in completely opposite directions! You don’t need to go out of your way, I can manage on my own.”

Nick instantly insisted, “Oh, come on, it’s really no trouble at all. Let’s go. Under the warm glow of the lamp posts, they stepped forward into the night.

Both of them walked in comfortable silence. Breaking the quiet, Nick asked Eun, “What are your favorite subjects?”

“Physics, Math, and Chemistry,” Eun replied.

Nick smiled and said, “Oh, that’s wonderful! I absolutely love those subjects too.“”Do you like reading fiction books?” Nick asked.“Yes, but I prefer understanding human psychology more,” Eun replied.

Saying this, Eun eagerly started sharing everything she knew about psychology.

Nick just stared at her, completely captivated, agreeing with everything she said and going along with her words. Eun, however, didn’t notice his intense focus at all.

Nick walked Eun safely to her house and said, “I’ll see you tomorrow then. Take care, bye.”

“Bye,” Eun replied.Once she got inside, Eun thought to herself that since the summer vacation had already started, Nick could easily teach her every day instead of every other day. That way, she would be able to finish her syllabus much faster.

Both of her parents were working professionals and weren’t home at the time. When they finally returned, Eun discussed her idea with them, and they readily agreed. They decided to talk to Nick about it, agreeing that if he was okay with the arrangement, they would schedule the classes every single day.

After finishing all her chores, Eun called Jeni.

Picking up the phone, Jeni casually asked, “Hey there, friend! What’s the news?” Eun opened up and spilled the entire story.

Jeni instantly began to tease her, playfully asking, “So, when is the wedding then?” “Jeni, stop it!” Eun snapped back, raising her voice a little. “Okay, okay, sorry, my bad!” Jeni quickly backtracked.

Then, changing her tone, she asked, “Hey, I actually need a huge favor from you. Will you help me out?”

“Sure, what is it? Tell me,” Eun replied.

“My parents are going out of town for a few months because of their work,” Jeni explained. “Can I please stay with you for these next few months? I mean, neither of us has any siblings anyway.”

Eun immediately beamed and said, “Oh my gosh, yes! Of course! Why on earth not? Move in tomorrow!”

“Thank you so much, bestie!” Jeni said, filled with gratitude.

The next morning, Jeni arrived at Eun’s house. Eun and her parents were absolutely thrilled to have her. Eun showed Jeni to her room, and after Jeni freshened up, the two best friends lost themselves in endless conversations.

At one point, Eun suggested, “Hey, why don’t you join me and study under Nick too?”

But Jeni instantly replied, “Look, sis, I don’t have a study-bug brain like yours! You go ahead and study—I’ll just stick to my love of literature.”

Around afternoon, Nick arrived.

Eun’s mother approached him and proposed the idea of daily lessons, and Nick readily agreed without any hesitation. Afterward, Eun introduced Nick to Jeni before they finally sat down to study.

During the session, Eun answered every single question Nick asked without any hesitation. Whatever he assigned her to write, she completed it with absolute ease. For the few things she couldn’t grasp, she carefully understood them through Nick’s guidance.

Nick was deeply impressed. “You already know everything so well,” he praised her. “Why were you even scared before?”

Eun replied, “I couldn’t really manage much before you started teaching me, but now I can. I guess you are my good luck charm.” After saying this, she immediately looked down and got back to her writing.

She didn’t say this because she had a crush on Nick; rather, she spoke out of pure respect because she had finally started finding joy in her studies.

Hearing her words, Nick let out a soft, gentle smile.

As Nick was about to leave, Eun asked him for his Facebook ID.

“If I run into any problems with my studies, I can message you there,” she explained.

Nick went quiet for a moment, appearing deep in thought, before finally sharing his ID with her.

The moment Nick left, the two friends scrambled to investigate his Facebook profile.

However, they barely found anything. Based on what she saw, Jeni remarked, “Well, he still looks like a major green flag or totally red flag .”

Eun looked skeptical and countered, “Nick hesitated before giving me his ID, and there’s almost nothing on his profile. He studies at such a massive university, yet his account is completely blank. Don’t you find that a bit strange?”

Jeni thought about it for a second and replied, “He’s studying engineering, so he probably just doesn’t have the time to post anything.”

After chatting a bit more, Eun went back to her room to study. However, thoughts of Nick kept drifting into her mind, though she quickly shook them off and forced herself to focus on her books.

The next day, Nick assigned Eun a writing task. While she was writing, Nick started showing her pictures of what he and his friends had done the previous day.

Eun, however, was finding it a bit distracting. Sensing her distraction, Nick stopped talking and remained quiet for the rest of the writing session.

Once she finished, he initiated the conversation again, asking, “What’s your favorite color?”

“I don’t really have a favorite color,” Eun replied. “My preference changes entirely depending on my mood. What about yours?”

“Black and red,” Nick said.

Eun let out a soft laugh and teased, “Well, those colors are a major part of human psychology! How would someone who only reads fiction ever understand color psychology?”

Nick laughed upon hearing her response. Then he asked, “By the way, do you play Free Fire, car racing games, or Uno?”

“Yes, I play all of them except Free Fire,” Eun replied.

“Great! I play pretty much everything too,” Nick said. “Alright then, I’ll see you tomorrow. Make sure to keep all your lessons completed.”

After Nick left, Eun couldn’t stop thinking about their conversation today. She caught herself wondering, Do I actually like Nick? But she immediately tapped her own head in disbelief and muttered, “Ugh, what on earth am I even thinking?”

Eun had never been in love in her entire life; she had always been completely focused on her studies. Because of this, these new feelings felt incredibly strange and different to her.

Today, Jeni told Eun all about her new boyfriend. She mentioned that she was going on a date with him tomorrow. It would be her third time going out on a date, but for the poor guy, it was his very first.

Hearing this, Eun let out a soft laugh and teased, “That poor boy is about to waste his precious time and money on you. Since it’s just his first date, it’ll probably last a week before he’s history!” Both friends burst into fits of laughter together.

But even through the laughter, Nick was the only one spinning around in Eun’s mind—specifically, his color choices. Driven by curiosity, she searched online to find out what different colors actually meant. She discovered that black represents mystery, while red symbolizes love or danger.

Right then, a chilling yet beautiful thought crossed Eun’s mind: Is Nick going to be the danger in my life, or is he a beautiful gift sent by the Almighty?

As the days passed, Eun’s thoughts about Nick grew deeper. She tried her best to remain neutral and unfazed, but Nick always found a way to make her feel special. Whenever she did poorly on a test, Nick would stand before her like a protective shield, defending her and reasoning with her parents. Slowly but surely, Eun’s whole life began to shift, yet she fiercely refused to acknowledge these new feelings. She kept convincing herself that Nick was simply her favorite teacher. However, the way Nick cared for her made her heart secretly long for something beyond a standard student-teacher relationship, even though she desperately tried to suppress that desire.

Ten days passed in this manner. One day, Nick was supposed to bring a specific notebook for her, but he forgot. He told her to send him a text message as a reminder. Following his instructions, Eun sent a text saying, “Please remember to bring the notebook today.”

Instantly, a reply popped up from the other side: “Who is this? And what notebook?”

Eun panicked. Her heart raced as she thought to herself, What’s going on? Why doesn’t he recognize me? She quickly double-checked the profile ID—it was definitely Nick’s account. So why on earth would he reply like that?

Anxious, Eun texted back, “I’m Eun. Who is this?”

Silence followed. There was no reply at all. An agonizing hour passed before another message finally flashed on her screen: “I’ll bring the notebook with me. I’ll explain everything clearly when I get there.”