The Humani

 So ... I’ve found what appears to be the last specimen of the humani that once dominated this giant ball of turquoise turd, lying suspended inside a cylindrical glass compartment, frozen by some kind of highly oxygenated liquid around its body, its optical receptors are shut, auditory receptors plugged, protective coverings on all the known humanic orifices. This... is... I mean, this could possibly change my life, if I was one of the humani, it would be like winning on the lottery these little creatures had, because even my most superior researchers had declared this species to be completely extinct with no possible way to recover genetic material for study and if I present this, I’d be basically excreting all over their smug neural clusters. So, you might be wondering how a low ranked garbage like me ended up in this situation! Well for that, we need to rewind time back to 48 sols ago.

I had graduated fresh out of the academy, though I was happy for me, my parents however were not happy with my average achievements. I was itching to use my craft operator’s license and go somewhere far way, find a warm humid planet and start my own extraction business. I was interested in this female, and she had also shown reciprocation through changing her tail color. I was thinking, maybe we both will get on a craft and explore the cluster, settle down for a few oversols before committing and having offsprings.

But things didn’t go as I wanted, right after the graduation, she performed her mating dance with me, her father was the commander of the domain expanding forces, she thought I didn’t need to work, but I wasn’t ready, I was not ready to bear offsprings, I wasn’t ready to live as a symbiote latched to her body after the offsprings I give birth eat most of my body, so when she tried to inject her genetic material inside me, I freaked out and avoided it, the embarrassment from wasting her genetic material in front of everyone made her go into chrysalises. Which reminds me, the humani males have it so easy when it comes to mating, they stick their little boneless jelly sticks inside the females and that’s it, the females have to do all the work, males don’t have to bear the offsprings inside their body, and then both the male and female humanis get to live as separate organisms, I wish we were like humani, except for their inefficient capacity of the number of offsprings they can bear, especially compared to 16,000 at a time like us.

Anyway, this made her father and her family angry and given how powerful they are, I ended up as a low-level research runt in humanics department. And from 30 sols I’ve been dragging my genitals on this shit hole of a planet studying these self-destructive extinct pieces of shit.

Today, I was supposed to be on a routine surface combing, but I fell asleep on the controller and blew a hole through what was previously presumed to be a solid block of concrete and here I am. I honestly don’t know what to do with this. The container is hooked to some kind of life supporting humanic machination, so I can’t leave it out here either. I think, I’ll park here for a few ticks and finish the rest of the tasks before deciding what to do with this.

_____________________________ 92 ticks later ________________________

So, it’s been 92 ticks since I stumbled upon the last specimen of the humani. You know I gave it a lot of thoughts. A closer examination of the sample I discovered showed that I could revive the humani from cryostasis. This is going to be my last mission here. I just realized something, that is, she’s more important to me than all of this, so I’m gonna go back home and make up with her, because all I wanted was to be with her, I was already at that moment with her, but I was too stupid to realize I didn’t need more time, there is nothing better I want than giving birth to our offspring and live on her sex organ as a part of her for the rest of my existence.

Oh! about the humani? So, I considered all possibilities, if I revived the humani now, we could take its genetic code and revive its whole primitive species back and they could continue existing with their lack of potential and zero contribution to the universe with their subpar intelligence. But then I took a look around me, the state of this gutter that qualifies as a planet they made their own, not to mention, if I need to go back home, I can’t afford to anger my superiors by shitting on their life’s work. So, I’ve decided to throw this humani into a volcano and be done with it.

You know, it does make me sad to end the existence of an entire species with my own appendages. But, as the humani’s body went up in flames after touching the lava and it’s skeleton crackled, a sense of calm and relief came over me. Because some species are simply not worth saving.