Badbyes

We’re Here.

Again.

The dream

or

Reality?

Connections strong, intimately felt

Eyes wide open, eyes wide

shut.

Visions

I’ve dreamt for,

for months, years, days.

You’re actually here.

Are we alive?

Are we dead?

Are we

pretending

until it comes to its end?

If feels like

home

when there’s no one else

trying to come inside.

But,

there are always people knocking at your door.

You

welcome it.

My home is for

me.

Not,

for “I love three”

How do you keep

someone in your life?

Keep them

Alive

When it’s never been the

right time.

Time

ran out the second the clock

ticked.

It’s always been

a miss.

A misunderstanding

of each other’s wants

and needs.

Can’t it just be us

please?

This time.

But, time is never

on our side.

The person who brought me

air, when I didn’t care

almost killed me

in the end.

With just one bullet

“Let’s be friends"

Friends,

lovers,

or nothing is what I repeat to myself.

And yet, being lovers first

to friends

has left me with nothing.

I’ve felt love,

ecstasy, warmth as we laid

side by side.

When it was gone,

and there was another

at your side, I felt

abandoned.

Like the death of my dad,

I mourned you.

But you were alive.

I didn’t erase our past,

I put it away. In your

box.

There wasn’t a key.

Maybe

because I always wanted it be

opened.

One day.

Instead, of it being you to lift the lid.

I surprised myself when

I

peeked in.

There were feelings.

Inside

Whether open or

closed.

That box holds everything to my soul.

It’s okay, I broke in

Without a key.

The box is mine.

It’s been here all of the time.

I’ll do

just fine.

Love doesn’t always mean

happiness.

It brings

sadness too.

And I can’t ever do two.

My tears come.

They’re here.

Always from just one eye,

when inside cries, and

there aren’t any words coming

out of my mouth.

This hungry

mouth.

Hungry lips

go silent.

My hand sometimes is

the only thing that can

speak.

So cheers to us, for a love

that is

sinful and sweet.

Accepting that we will

never be

two that is one.

That

fantasy is done.

A love

with a

broken clock.