The baby commotion

Rory Pov

Friday 13th August 1999

It was 9 O’clock in the morning, it was my birthday and I was slightly hungover, (I went out the night before, sue me, I wasn’t exactly a responsible nearly 17 year old), and normally I would be snoring my arse off still, (because I liked my sleep as a teenager), especially because I had booked the day off work, but for some reason, I was wide awake.

I was about to make myself a cuppa, as I was up anyway and a cuppa normally helped when I was hungover, (don’t ask me why that was, as I don’t know), when something within me felt the sudden and totally out of place urge to check the front door, (I have never been and will never be an early socialiser), even though anyone that I would want to see would’ve been at work or still snoring their arses off from the night before, (plus I didn’t think that it anybody that I knew, which was slightly weird to me).

As I was opening the front door, I started to hear a babies cry, (or maybe it was there before but I didn’t notice, who knows), so I looked down, and there was a whole newborn baby outside my door, there was a note left with them, which I obviously read as it was addressed to me.

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Dear Rory

This is Orla, your daughter, she was born 6 O’clock this morning, I can’t take care of a baby, I hope you understand that, and please don’t be mad at me, and I hope one day Orla knows that I do love her in my own way.

Regards,

Shelly

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It was kind of weird to look at this newborn baby and think ‘oh that’s my daughter’, but I also couldn’t deal with the idea of giving her up, (maybe I was being totally weird about this, but I don’t think that I was being weird about it though), but being hungover and buying newborn shit didn’t sound like a good idea to me, (not that I had any other options, but I wanted it noted that I knew it wasn’t smart of me to do that).

“Alright Munchkin, we’re going out to get you some things, happy birthday to me indeed”

I’m still not sure if newborns get much from you talking to them, but it made me feel a little bit better about the whole thing, (though maybe I’m a mad man and I didn’t know that yet), plus there is a point that you get to where talking to a baby is beneficial to them, I’m just not sure when that is exactly, (though I should know given how many kids I have).

Anyway, I went to the local shop, hoping to fuck that I’d actually be able to get things that I needed for a newborn, but honestly I wasn’t even sure if they’d have anything, it was pure hope on my end to be honest with you here, I get there and I was completely lost on where to even look, (because you know, I wasn’t a baby except, I honestly didn’t even know a baby needed), that was until a really old lady came along and just decided to help me, (which I appreciated).

“You look lost dear”

“I am a bit”

“You’re Irish?”

“Yes I am, not long over, a little under a year”

“You look a bit young yet to be married”

“I’m not married no, I looked out my door this morning and found this baby girl left outside with a note”

“Explains the look of rushed confusion, come on let’s get you some newborn things”

“Yes Ma’am”

This old Irish lady just bloody guided me through the shop, like she was some sort of Fairy Godmother for single teenage Dads, because as soon as we had all the stuff that Orla could have needed, it was like she was never there, which was fucking wild to me, (like how the fuck did that even happen?).

Anyway went and paid for everything and then went straight home again, as I didn’t know how much time a newborn should be out and about in the world, but I also didn’t have any family around me to stay with Orla as Dad was still in Ireland with my little sister Kerry and I don’t know where my mother was to be honest with you, (actually I still couldn’t tell you where she is if you asked me now).

Honestly after that it was a day of learning how to look after a newborn and fitting in cups of tea and my meals in between all that, and yeah, babies are hard work, but they’re cute and they’re at least not that squirmy at the newborn stage.