Once Heaven, Then Hell

Beachside County Sheriff's Office

August 18th, 2008

Jamie!

I remember calling out to my son, officer.

I remember reaching for him that Monday, coming back from the beach. His swimming shorts were soaked with water, as well as certainly going to be a pain to wash.

Never again, in my wildest dreams would I have thought that would be the last time I got a good hold of my son and kept his head close to mine as I hugged him. He was trying to get away, and I gave chase. Daniel, my husband, just laughed to himself and watched

It was his first laugh all beach day, now that I think about it.

Daniel was never much of a talker, at least since we got married. Before then he was always yapping his face off, "Hannah! Hey! Hannah!" he'd say as I finally responded with a fairly loud, " "What?" He'd respond, as usual with a, "nothin'". That's just one example.

Annoying as he was, I couldn't help but love him. After we got married, he just kind of...shut up though. This short, stumpy man with a turning-gray-stubble he paraded around like a trophy, loudly (and proudly) arrogant amongst anyone he knew, yet shy with anyone he didn't, was now fully shy even with anyone he knew. Family and friends would all call him "DD" which felt very out of place for me. He was always, around them at least, so very giddy and loud and goofy. Even after we got married. He never was like that at home or with me, though.

His black hair, which was usually slicked back for a hard day of cubicle work, turned into a fairly long modern flowing mullet down to his shoulder blades. Still greased, just less particular. He stopped always complimenting me in the morning which, to be honest, I was fine with. It always creeped me out how he'd sneak up on me making breakfast in the morning behind me and say, "Mornin' sunshine, you look beautiful today." You ever meet someone a bit...too nice? Yeah, that. It was cute, but it was constant. Like he was trying to talk me off a ledge every morning.

Before making the trip, Jamie had just finished up elementary school, and we felt like surprising him with a trip would be a great idea. Usually, it is. We looked online for hours for a nice place to stay at the beach, and finally, towering over the South Carolina coastline like a 30 story monster, painted the color of sunbleached rose petals, stood the Palmetto Rosetta.

At $90 a night, it was fairly cheap for the week we planned on staying. We both looked at each other, then at our son's room, then back at the laptop. We had to book a room. The reviews were wonderful, as were the photos. What hotel needs two indoor pools? We were definitely going to find out.

We told Jamie to pack, and he lit up like a Christmas tree. He bounced around the room like a ricocheting bullet, almost knocking over our only TV set. He giggled and giggled for what felt like hours. Took about two days, but since the thought of flying scares him, we decided to pack up the van, and go off for the Southeast. He took with him 1 suitcase, and three boxes for collecting shells.

Our native Indiana was about 12 hours away, so we were going to have to stop on the way there, sleep in the car because we didn't have money for another hotel, and then keep moving. From Gary to Tennesee, we let Jamie play whatever station he wanted, and he chose the rock station, obviously. He headbanged so hard the car kept jolting forward, so we had to beg him to stop. He didn't stop talking, either. Much like his father, very impatient, and always worrying about what devil'll be around every corner.

"Are we there yet?"

"no."

"Are we getting there?"

"yyyep."

"How long until we get there?"

"Ask again, and I'll turn around."

"Fine, fine."

"...I have to pee."

And repeat.

We got to a rest stop in Tennesee, and just as I was making space, laying down seats, Daniel did something a bit odd. I kissed Jamie on the head, lied down in the very small space available in the back next to him, and started to doze off. Just as I did that, however, Daniel, who was sleeping sitting up in the front seat, just a little bit reclined, got out of the car. He opened the back door, I played asleep, and I'm hoping so did Jamie, and remarked under his breath, "Stupid Fucker".

I did not get up.

I wasn't even really sure if he meant me or Jamie, but I was way too tired to care. He closed the door softly and stayed outside for what I thought was a good 10 minutes before getting in. I don't know what he was doing, I never cared to peak, but I felt like he just stood there and watched. He's never gotten this weird before. He doesn't drink, not to my knowledge, so him randomly muttering something like...that? Not my husband. Either way, I fell asleep, and prepared to check in at 3pm the next day.

When we woke up around 8:30, apparently Daniel had driven the car without us knowing to a gas station. "Daniel, we got gas before we parked" I said loud enough for him to hear, as I looked up at him through the window. No clue why he was standing outside, we weren't even at a pump. He replied, "I'd rather us get snacks here than at the beach. It's cheaper y'know. This logic made sense to me, so I shook up Jamie and we went inside to get our snacks.

As we walked in, Daniel said he'd be right there. He got on the phone and started to talk to someone. I stared for a bit, and he stared back. He went from a blank expression to a slight smile, and he waved. I waved back, a tiny bit confused, and he went around the back of the car, where I couldn't see him.

I went inside with my son, and waited patiently for my husband near the cooler at the back. As I looked to my left, despite my better judgement, I saw through the glass window, slightly stained with the burning rays of the sun, my husband taking something out of the trunk, and crushing it with his foot.

It was a box for collecting shells.