Chapter 1: Welcome to Madness
The first sign that I had made a terrible decision was the landlord's welcome speech.
"Nobody should bring trouble into my compound."
I stood there with my two bags, one bucket, and the last remaining hope that adulthood was going to be peaceful.
I looked around.
There were six tenants standing in front of me.
One woman was holding a baby.
One man was holding a plate of rice.
Another man was holding a broom like he was ready to fight somebody with it.
Then there was an old woman sitting on a plastic chair, staring at me like she had been waiting for my arrival since 1997.
The landlord cleared his throat.
"This is our new tenant."
Everybody looked at me.
I smiled.
"Good afternoon."
Nobody answered.
The woman with the baby finally spoke.
"Which room?"
"Room four."
The old woman gasped.
I frowned.
"What?"
She looked at the landlord.
"You gave her room four?"
The landlord nodded.
"Yes."
She shook her head slowly.
"My brother, you don't love this girl."
I laughed awkwardly.
"Why?"
Nobody answered.
I looked at the landlord.
He suddenly became very interested in his slippers.
"Is there something wrong with the room?"
"No," he said quickly.
"Then why is everybody looking at me like I just announced my death?"
The man holding the plate of rice finally spoke.
"Madam, just sleep with one eye open."
I stared at him.
"Excuse me?"
He took another spoonful of rice.
"Nothing."
I turned to the landlord.
"Is there a problem?"
He smiled.
"No problem."
Then he lowered his voice.
"Just don't open your door after midnight."
I froze.
"Why?"
He smiled again.
"Goodnight."
Then he walked away.
I stood there.
"Goodnight?"
I looked around.
Everyone was already leaving.
Nobody wanted to explain anything.
I picked up my bags and entered my room.
The room was actually nice.
Small, but clean.
I dropped my bags on the bed.
"Finally."
I sat down.
Peace.
Silence.
A new beginning.
I smiled.
Then I heard a loud knock.
BAM! BAM! BAM!
I jumped off the bed.
"Who is it?"
A woman's voice answered.
"Open this door."
I opened it slightly.
The old woman from outside was standing there.
She looked left.
Then right.
Then leaned closer.
"You're the new girl?"
"Yes."
She nodded.
"Good."
"Good?"
"Yes."
She looked inside my room.
Then whispered:
"Have you seen the toilet?"
I blinked.
"The toilet?"
"Yes."
"Of course."
She grabbed my arm.
"Don't use it after 11 p.m."
I stared at her.
"Why?"
She looked genuinely terrified.
"Because that's when Madam Blessing starts washing clothes."
I waited.
"...So?"
The old woman sighed.
"Her washing machine is connected to the toilet light."
I stared at her.
"What does that have to do with me?"
She looked at me like I was slow.
"When she switches it on, your room starts vibrating."
I looked around.
"You're joking."
"I wish."
She turned to leave.
Then she stopped.
"Oh, one more thing."
"What?"
"If you hear somebody shouting 'WHO TOOK MY GARRI?' at midnight..."
She pointed at the ceiling.
"Don't answer."
I stared at her.
"Why?"
"Because that person isn't looking for garri."
She walked away.
I slowly closed my door.
I stood there for five seconds.
Then I whispered to myself:
"Favourite, you are finished."
At exactly 12:17 a.m., I heard it.
"WHO TOOK MY GARRI?!"
I sat upright in bed.
Another voice shouted from downstairs.
"I DIDN'T TAKE YOUR GARRI!"
Then somebody screamed.
Then something crashed.
Then the landlord shouted:
"EVERYBODY SHOULD GO BACK TO SLEEP!"
I pulled my blanket over my head.
I had been in the compound for less than twelve hours.
And already...
I wanted my deposit back.
