The Simpsons: Man Hunt

Written by Matthew Sinn A.K.A. Sinbad the Mountain

My name is Homer Simpson, a 39 year old fat husband and father of three kids. Who was currently on my coffee break at the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant. Who was grabbing myself a nice tasty donut when my eyes noticed this letter sitting on top of the donut box. With my name written on it, which made me curiously ask myself. What's this? As I opened the letter and began reading it to myself.

Dear Homer Simpson

We wish to congratulate you for winning our Wild Family Show contest and are offering you and you'r family a chance to not only enjoy free donuts. But also the chance to win 50,000.00 dollars. Who hope to see you tomorrow at this address.

With me surprised by this while also struggling to remember. If I've entered this contest or not.

Who later showed my wife after work. With my wife Marge was surprised by this while speaking to me within the living room. My word....50,000.00 dollars is a whole lot of money. But also find this weird. Because I don't recall ever entering this contest. With me replying. Well I sure didn't. But might know who did. As I quickly went upstairs to my daughter Lisa room and started knocking on her closed door. While also trying to stay quiet. So I wouldn't wake up the baby Maggie from her nap. With Lisa curiously replying. Yes? With me asking her. Lisa, did you send a letter to that Wild Family Show? Lisa replied. No. Which surprised me since she seemed to becoming a fan of it. Who also knew it couldn't have been Bart. Since he was more of a trouble maker.

Which made me wonder to myself. Who was it that entered us into the contest? That I quickly forgot about after having some wonderful cold beer at Moe's Tavern. Where I told the guys about the contest. Which surprised all of them as my friend Lenny spoke. Wow Homer. You are one lucky guy to go onto that show. For I've scene it a couple of times and it's really fun. With my other friend Carl replying. I'm with Lenny on this one. For you'r all going to have a blast. With me now speaking. I sure hope so. Though I never did find out who entered me and my family into the contest. Which made our bartender Moe speak. Maybe you wrote a note to them and just forgot about it. This seemed to make the most sense as I replied. Then I really hope this goes well. For its going to be a long drive.

For it was the very next day that we made the three hour drive out of Springfield and travelling north. As we've eventually reached the site. Which didn't look like much, since it was nothing but trailers and parked cars. With no building anywhere in sight, since it was all filmed outside. While also noticing that something was strange. For there didn't seemed to be anyone around. Which I've found kind of odd, as Marge curiously spoke while walking towards the main stage area. Where is everyone? Which was a good question as Bart spoke while walking. Maybe the show was so boring, they all decided to quit and leave. With Lisa now speaking. Really? Then why are all their cars still here? Which was a really good question. As Marge now spoke while still carrying Maggie. Maybe they're on their coffee break. With me now speaking with worry. I sure hope not. For that would mean all the donuts would be gone.

As we've kept looking around and couldn't find anyone out here at all. Which really confused us, as we've quickly spotted all the donuts on the long table over towards our left side. Which made me smile as I spoke with joy. Donuts. Who hurried over as Marge quickly spoke. Kids, stop you'r father. In case those are part of the prize. With them quickly rushing over towards me. As I opened one of the boxes out of hunger. Ready to devour them into nothing but tasty crumbs. Only to suddenly get sprayed by this pink colour smoke. Which started to make me cough pretty badly here. Who also saw the other ones pop open by themselves as the kids were sprayed by the same stuff. But also Marge and Maggie too. As we all started to feel dizzy and sleepy too. Which made me think in confusion. What's going on? For why did those boxes spray smoke at us? Before suddenly passing out where I stood and later waking up next to a very worried Marge.

Who looked down at me while speaking. Thank goodness you'r awake Homer. For I think we're in big trouble. Quickly confused here I replied while quickly noticing that we weren't near the crafts table anymore. But somewhere else entirely. As I spoke in confusion here. What are you talking about? A why are we both in the woods? Marge told me while looking really worried here. I don't know what happened after we passed out. But from what I'm able to tell. It seems somebody moved us into the woods. But also put what looks like ankle monitors on our right ankles as well. Plus I don't know where the kids are either. Knowing this was bad I slowly stood up after seeing the ankle monitor on me while speaking with worry. Marge....do you remember the show being like this? She replied. No Homer. The show wasn't anything like this and shouldn't be at all. With me standing here before calling out loudly.

Lisa! Bart! Maggie! Where are you?! Who listened and couldn't hear anything. Which wasn't good as Marge spoke with worry. This is really bad Homer. For I've got no idea on what is going on. But don't like this at all. With me replying in this sad confused voice. Oh....this is great. For first I've betrayed by donuts. A now we've somehow ended up within the woods. With no idea on where the kids are at. Marge wasn't happy about this either. As she quickly noticed something towards our right before speaking. Homer. I think I see a note. With me surprised by this as she walked towards it with me asking. What does it say? With Marge grabbing it from this small rock and began reading it out loud.

Dear Contestants;

We've taken over this little show and decided to change it. Into something more....fun. For you've got only three hours to reach the spot on the back of this note. Otherwise you'll face a very....terrible....fate.

Sign; The Fear Show Gang

With me quickly confused here as I asked. Who in the world is that? With Marge replying. I don't know Homer. But whoever they are, they sound really serious. A not somebody you would want to go and anger. With me then shouting again. Kids! It's you'r father! If you can hear me! Shout something back! Who then listened as I soon heard a boy shout. Eat my shorts! That's when we both saw the kids approaching with Maggie. While also wearing ankle monitors too. Who were surprised by this sight as Marge quickly hugged them while speaking. Oh thank goodness you'r all alright. With Lisa looking confused here as she spoke. Mom, what is going on? For this is nothing like the show? With Marge replying. I don't know kids. But it seems we've somehow landed ourselves in big trouble. Which caused Bart to ask. What kind of trouble are we in now?

With me wishing I honestly had the answer here. When we all heard what sounded like movement from somewhere over towards our left side. Causing me to speak. Who's there? That's when this colourful light suddenly flew over my head while burning the bark on a tree close by. Which caused me to quickly scream in fear. Before the rest of my family did and then started to run as more of those bright lights came flying towards our direction. With me shouting in fear. Run for you'r lives! Which we all did as quickly as we possibly could. While having no idea on who's attacking us or why. Only that we've got to get ourselves out of here. As we all kept running with Bart spoke in confusion and fear. Are those real lasers? With Lisa replying while trying to run ahead of Bart. After what we've scene, I would say yes. A not advise any of us to be hit by them.

We all kept this noted as we were still fleeing for our lives. With Marges long tall blue hair being shot and burned. With a few holes burned into it while also being cut by the low hanging branches, smacked by leaf's and also running into spider webs. With whoever attacking us still firing lasers at us from far behind. With everyone still moving as it wasn't long before they seemed to have stopped firing here. Who were all glad, especially me. Since I was running short on breath. As we quickly stopped to rest up. While also seeing no signs of any danger close by. With me sitting down on this random fallen tree close by. With Marge also sitting down while speaking in this tired voice. Homer....I don't know. What is....going on. But I don't....like this at....all.