LopVampa

“Hi, hi, hi,

I’m Siorc Ingne,

Hehe, hehe, hello! Um, hehe,

I’m not a talker, but,

Hehe, I can hardly contain my excitement, so hi,

I’m called Siorc! I’m a LopVampa in a place called Lagozora! I’m a vampire bat bunny person!

My village is a farm village and we worship twenty deities that made Lagozora!

Yes, twenty! So many!

Now, the one who oversees our village is called Divisee.

And, hehe, I try to

Make our farm

Extra special for him! Guess what?

It’s almost my hundredth birthday!

So, okay, here’s a

Super cool fact!

In Lagozora,

Once you’re one hundred, you

Receive your true divine name! And later, a

Career from the divine! Isn’t that

Awesome? Since I am always farming, I can feel it! I’ll be Farmbu!

Now, tomorrow is my birthday! I’ll come of age! An adultbun! I

Don’t know what my divine true name will be, but

You know I

Am hoping for Farmbu!

Yes

It’s

My destiny

To be a farmer, if for some

Unholy

Reason I am

Not Farmbu

I do

Not know what I’m

Going to do.

Oh, no, what if my

Name is something

Especially

Horrible like?!

Unhappy Bunny?! Oh,

No! Some of our

Deities are a little silly. Silly

Rabbits. They won’t mess with me, right?

Everything will go fine!

Dandy! I

Am destined to be a farmer! My brother and sister say so!

Not mama, though I

Don’t care what she

Thinks! She’s always

Over in the bun capital!

Maybe she’ll attend my naming ceremony but she’ll be

Red in the face I bet what she’s wrong!

Roar, roar roar.

Okay, I’m all fired up!

Will

It all be sparkly? I feel

Like my ceremony will be sparkly!

Lala,

Guess I should put out offerings too!

Ehe, the gods like

The sweet taste of

Mangoes! I’m growing a tree of them in the

Yard. Let’s hope

They like them! They’re

Ripe!

Uuuuuh, ooh, goodbye childhood. Tomorrow, I’m an adultbun.

Everything will be amazing!

No more babying,

And I’ll be able to live

My dream as a Farmer with a brand new divine name! My true name,

Ehe!”

[O, our poor, poor sacrificial godbuns in our painful season!

We gave our people land, we gave our people tools.

Yet they are far from self sufficient, they are a bunch of fools.

Why, O, why is this so?

We are but a mere group of deities.

And, yet, our people’s needs

Never seem to be satiated, indeed.

O, our poor, poor, sacrificial godbuns,

What is a deity to do?

Their reliance grows heavy,

And yet, when we extend our wings.

They feel no pity.

Why o, why is this so?

O, our poor, poor, godbuns of splendor and glee,

What is a deity to do?

When the spark of joy has since popped indefinitely?

Our people ask for more,

And never give anything in return.

Demand, demand, demand, they plea.

Please, divine above, we need you, please!

We descend, we give them what they seek?

Everything, these divine eyes can see.

O, our poor, poor, godbuns of pain and misery.

What can be done to change this system of agony?

Divine names granted upon thee,

Expectations are higher with every century.

Why, o why is this so?

We are at a loss on where to go.

In this season of misery,

Change is mandatory!]

A new dawn has risen.

It had been early dawn in the world of Lagozora, a nation of vampire bat lagomorph and rodent creatures known as Lopvampa. The buns were sleeping peacefully, the nocturnal villages were getting themselves ready to switch off for the morning, and the sun rising deity was about close to ready to bringing light to the world, like always.

Sun slowly lifting itself up in the sky, the switch was flipped. Goodnight, nocturnal beings of Lagozora, and good morning to the daytime risers. At any given moment, millions of buns would wake up all at once. Time to release the bird call, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet. A new day has risen in the world, praise the lords!

Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.

Hearing the familiar bird calls from a large dune buggy shaped bed had been a short, ninety nine year old feminine appearing vampire bat rabbit individual with long dark purple hair that went down to about the chest ever so frizzy from the pillow beneath. Mismatched purple and green eyes popping straight open, a large sea of freckles made their roar known to the world. Baggy pajamas with a smiling tomato and gardening rake, a smile soon decorated the bun’s face.

Twenty four hours left! In just one day, the vampa would finally be an adultbun! One hundred years old, the coming of age day. Ninety nine years on this planet, and finally, the bun will have reached the century milestone. Trying not to squee, the bun lifted the self up from the bed. Time to change the day!

Turning towards the calendar on the wall, the fourth month of the year and twenty sixth day had been ripped of the calendar. This will be the final moment where the world would see the bun as a clildbun. Tomorrow, the day will finally arrive, adultbun life. And, with adultbun life would bring the most important ever.

The most important thing ever.

In just one day, it would finally happen, the bun would receive the true name. The divine name blessed by the godbuns. It was coming, tomorrow is the day. The destiny meant for the bun will finally arrive. The vampa can feel it in the bones. Farmer Bunny. This is definitely what divine name will be gifted.

Singing a little tune, the bun let out a tiny sigh. Tomorrow is finally the day, huh? How did time go by so fast? It felt like just yesterday that the bun turned fifty. But, what is time anyway? This would just be one stage of possibly thousands of years to come! The end of the bridge of childhood was here, and a brand new crossroad was coming.

Knock, knock, knock.

Pounding on the opposite side of the door waiting for the person, the soon to be adult jumped up. Woah, where did the time go? It was almost breakfast time already? Man, this morning sure is speeding by pretty fast! Maybe a little too quick. Pounds on the other side continuing on, two voices threw themselves a bone.

“Siorc, it’s time to wake up, we’re making breakfast soon!” voice number one said.

“You don’t think he’s still sleeping, do you?” voice number two asked.

“Maybe. I bet he was up all night thinking about tomorrow again.” A sigh.

“You’re right.” Sigh number two.

Silly, definitely wrong accusations coming from the opposite end, the bun reached for Talkmaster B. Come on now, he totally wasn’t awake almost the entire night thinking about tomorrow! Nope! He totally slept. Definitely, he totally did. Okay, maybe that was a teeny white lie, but he slept maybe four hours. He did, totally yup. Half of that.

Large boxy dual hand sized mechanical creature with huge red buttons on the bottom powering on, the vampa placed his hands on the knobs. Little picture on the screen, his tongue was sticking out. Better put a little sun here, and, oh, a little smiley face, too. Imperfect circle placed beside the sun, a gleeful look filled up the screen. Words forming, a voice played out.

[Good morning, Deigr and Strix. I slept last night, come on! I’m not that excited for tomorrow! Hehe. What are we making this morning?] A crackled, high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B’s speakers.

“He stayed up all night,” voice one said.

“He definitely stayed up all night,” voice two said.

[Did not! So, what are we making this morning?] A crackled, high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B’s speakers.

“Mom’s home, so we’re making Pork Cabbage bites,” voice one said. “Can you be ready in half an hour?”

Pork Cabbage bites brought to his attention, the bun placed his hands on the side of his chin. Wow, mama’s come back from the capitol early? Oh, gosh! Does that mean she’ll be here in time for tomorrow? He could feel a spark flow through him at such. Everything was lining up to be the perfect day ahead! Shaking the device, a nodding creature had been scribbled on the screen next.

[Yup. Give me thirty.] A high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B’s speakers.

“Kay, see you then,” voice two said.

Sprinting towards his bed drawers, the soon to be young adultbun leaped into the powder room. But, as the little sprinkler poured down upon him, the thoughts continued to rumble. He can’t believe it, mama is going to be home today. What about papa? But, he shook his head a such. Nah, he’s probably not coming. When was the last time he was home? Oh, right, so long ago, he can’t remember. Oh, well!

Parking himself in front of the mirror, baggy eyes locked onto him in his reflection. Okay, maybe he should have slept a little more last night, but can anyone blame him for having a full skirt of ants? Nope! It’s not every day a Lopvampa turns one hundred. Reaching for the concealer, the darkness was vanquished.

Scrunchie in hand, the vampa placed his finger on his chin. What hairstyle should he go for today? Hair pulled up into a left swept high ponytail, his ears bopped on the top of his head. Looking sharp as usual, hehe! Light green smiley face hairpins and earrings clicked into place, a dark pink fuzzy shirt with a grinning tree swallowed him whole. Violet knee length skirt plopped onward, he hopped off towards the kitchen. Please, don’t start without him!

“Come on, Siorc, no need to hop so fast, we haven’t even started yet!” voice one said.

“Yeah, hold your horses, we were just about to heat up the meat,” voice two said.

Standing in the kitchen with a knife in her left hand had been a tall adult Lopvampa with light purple hair tied into twisted twin drills that reached to about her shoulders. Large, floppy ears the same shade as her locks, her bright green eyes were almost radioactive. Pure white angel wings behind her, the bun stared at his singular dark purple bat wing. When he’s two hundred like Deigr, would he get those, too? Nah, maybe not. Plain lilac shade shirt with the words, Curious Hare printed on it, a green hare with a kissy face on it laid in the center of it all. Locking eyes with it, he always wondered. How did the Godbuns decide that name for her? She was hardly curious all the time.

Taking out the meat in the corner had been a taller adult Lopvampa with bright spiky green hair that barely that reached the shoulders. Loose stringy portions draping over the chest, he adorned a teal shirt with a screaming hare on it the same shade. Eyes this hue as well, the words Stressed Hare was printed straight in the center. He still remembered the day Strix got his divine name. How long ago now? Ah, right, fifty years prior. Man, time sure blinks fast.

[I know, I know, but mama will be up any minute now! We should probably get to cooking now, right?] A high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B’s speakers.

“I dunno ‘bout that, knowing mother, she’ll be sleepin’ ‘till last second,” Strix said, shaking his head. “Capitol’s been workin’ her to the bone lately. Maybe she shoulda gotten the divine name Stresha insteada me.” He laughed as he said such.

“Nah, I feel like she’ll be up pretty soon, so let’s get cooking!” Deigr cried.

[What do you want me to do?] A high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B’s speakers.

“You can bake the fruits, I guess,” Deigr said, shrugging. “Take the strawberries out of the fridge.”

[Kay!] A high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B’s speakers.

Hopping off towards the fridge, the bun’s tail wagged from behind him. Stuffed baked strawberries for breakfast? They almost never had those! Thank the godbuns that this year’s harvest season was so fruitful! Tray taken out, the vampa hummed. Little little strawberries for everybody, one, two, three!

Chop, chop, chop, chop. Creatures cut down the middle, a recipe had been placed in front of him. Strix wants them stuffed with pork bits, huh? Easy peasy. Clapping the meat pieces in, the berries were sealed like a zipper closing shut. That should do it, right? He didn’t skip a step or anything, did he?

Sprinkling down the vanilla, the critters had been placed into the oven. He sealed them up correctly, right? Gosh, his hands were definitely quivering there for a little bit! Well, no matter, they were in the oven now! How long did he have to put them in for? Oh, right, ten minutes. Cranking the dial, he whistled. Please, let these be perfect.

“Siorc, can you wash the cabbage for me?” Strix groaned. “Mother just texted an’ said, she wants tenna ’em this morning.” As he said such, his paws were on the side of his face. “She waited ’till last second ta say it, can’t believe it!”

“What?! She wants more?” Deigr cried. “Did she invite her capitol friends here again?”

“Nah, she said, an’ I quote, ′Stresha, Curiha, make me ten pork cabbage bites, I’m really hungry,′ I already started making the first batch! Gah, I can’t believe it! She makes me want to pull my hair out!” Little strands of hair blew on the air at the very moment.

“Uh, you already kinda did that just now.” She laughed.

Hopping back towards the fridge, the soon to be young adult yoinked the cabbage from the bottom drawer. Mama wanted more cabbage bites, huh? Consider it done! She wanted ten? He’ll make twenty, no, thirty! Okay, maybe not that many! Plopping the round leafy critters of goodness in the sink, the torrent almost knocked the veggies out the door.

Handing the veggies off, the sweet, sweet berries had been removed from the oven. Aroma dancing around the room, the bun was almost ready to float on the air. Oh, gosh, these looked so tasty! Reaching for them, he slapped his hand away. Patience, future Farmbu, patience. Ah, no, his resistance was fading. Strawberries, come to momma.

“Don’t even think about eating those yet!” Deigr shouted. “Wait for mother to come in!”

Snapping his fingers, the bun put the tin aside. Dang, caught already. Can’t he just have one, please? But, he knew he would probably face the wrath of the older sister if he had done so. That was worse than the wrath of the gods! Loaded cabbages dropped into a cooking pot, the vampa set the table. Any second now, and mama would be awake, look alive!

Everything ready, the bun drummed his fingers on the table. Where’s mama? She was taking forever to come out of her room! She didn’t go back to sleep did she? Should he wake her? Make he should wake her. Nails continuing their little rhythm, a sea of annoyed groans had come his way almost immediately.

“Come on, Siorc, be patient,” Deigr said, groaning. “Mama will be here in a minute, okay?”

“Yah, so, could ya please stop drumming your fingas?” Strix asked. “She just texted me saying, ′Sorry, I took too long doing my makeup, hehe.′ Give her a minute.” He then sighed once more. “Now, get up from the table and put the cabbages in the serving bowl.

[Kay.] A high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B.

Everything finally ready, that familiar, but almost foreign hopping sound danced through the vampa’s eardrums. Here she is, mama! When was the last time he had seen her again? Oh, who knows, who cares? She’s here! She’s finally eating at the table with them! Scribbling a waving smiley face on the screen, everything burned with anticipation.

Short, middle aged lopvampa with long, leg length dark purple hair hopping towards the dining table, the soon to be young adult tried to keep himself from exploding. Oh, gosh, here’s mama! Come around here more often, why doesn’t she? Why does the capitol have to keep her cooped up all the time?

“Good morning, Curiha,” mama greeted.

“Mornin’, mother,” Deigr greeted.

“Good morning, Stresha!” mama greeted.

“Mornin’, mother,” Strix sighed. “Can ya please just call me Strix when we’re in the house? The godbuns ain’t listening ya know!” But, such fell on deaf ears.

“Good morning, future Farmbu,” mama greeted.

[Good morning, mama! It’s been forever, where you been? We made Pork Cabbage Bites for you!] A high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B.

“You know the capitol keeps me busy, honey,” mama responded, seating herself at the table. “But, I took off for your birthday.” She sipped her tea for a moment. “Speaking of which, are you still friends with Zhulong and Niquel?”

“Mother, they’re called Swanbu and Jokebu now, remember?” Deigr asked.

“Ah, I see,” mama said. “Swanky Bunny and Joker Bunny, huh, what lovely divine names!”

[Yup, we’re still the best of friends!] A high pitched feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B.

“That’s great, hon, I’m glad,” mama replied with a smile. “Do you want me to invite them to your divine naming ceremony?”

[That’s fine with me! Can I have it inside the barn, please?] A high pitched feminine voice red out of the Talkmaster B.

“Where else did ya think we were gonna have it?” Strix asked. “I’m sure ya woulda turned down anywhere else!” He then sighed, ready to pull his hair out. “After breakfast make sure ya go pick the fruit ‘an check on th’ critters, kay?”

Nodding, the bun looked at his watch. Oh, no, it’s already the tenth hour! Everything wolfed down in an instant, he stood up from the table. He’s super late! He was supposed to feed the chickens! Cabbage bites down the hatch, he hurried to get his gear. He can already hear the clucks coming from a mile away! He’d better get out of here!

Zoom!

->

Ring, ring, it’s the tenth hour!

It’s the tenth hour!

Work time, work time! All daytime working Lopvampas, head to your stations!

Cluck, cluck, cluck, cluck. Dashing through the grass, a gigantic chicken coop soon awaited the farmer. Little and big chickens adorning every single color of the rainbow, the soon to be young adult reached for the bag of chickenfeed. Oh, gosh, he was almost late! The Godbuns would definitely scold him for this starting tomorrow! Oh, no! Maybe he should enjoy his last day before adulthood a teeny tiny bit more.

Cluck, cluck, caw.

Bowls aplenty filled up, the vampa looked at the morning checklist. What did he have to get done today? Oh, right, he has to go pick the mangoes and check for eggs. And, there was probably some invading pests in the main barn again. Why were there so many Chocobats around these parts lately? Maybe the Godbuns were creating new species to help the ecosystem? Perhaps.

No eggs anywhere to be seen, the bun sighed. Man, it sure had been a slow season so far. Not a single egg had been laid! Will the farmer’s market be in trouble in the summer? Maybe. Actually, nah, maybe the other farms in the neighboring village had more luck. He swore, ever since spring rolled around, something definitely changed around here! Was it just his imagination?

Hopping towards the mango tree, the farmer’s eyes sparkled. So many ripe ones today! Divisee will be delighted when he descends tomorrow! He should probably leave a whole ton as an offering, right? Yeah, of course. Flapping upward, the fruits had been dropped into the basket. Kay, what’s next on the agenda today?

Checkbox reading to check on the ducks, geese and swan and then harvest the rest of the ripe fruit, the farmer reached for the bag of wheat. Guess dealing with the vermin can wait until the afternoon. Dashing towards the little pond in the corner, a million honks shook the water aplenty. Woah, someone’s hungry. Okay, okay, take their wheat!

But, fate soon had other plans for him. Puddle slipping from beneath him, the soon to be young adult plopped face first into the bed of liquid in front. Ducks quacking aplenty, the bun bit his lower lip. These quackers put that little trap here on purpose, didn’t they? Take this, wheat attack, roar! But, as he did such, a set of warm voices called out to him.

“Having trouble with the ducks again, huh?” a deep voice asked.

“Seems so,” voice number two said, sighing. “They really don’t like you, huh?”

Standing on the other side of the pond had been a tall masculine Lopvampa with short fuchsia hair that barely reached the chin. Top portion of the bangs twisted back, he had huge pink eyes with no sclera. Shirt the same color as his pupils with a bunny adorning a tie, beneath such had been the text, Swanky Bunny. Green jeans looking quite messy, his singular wing flapped. It had been about a year since Zhulong came of age. Where are his angel wings? Strange, he thought he’d have transformed by now. Sorry, his bad, Swanbu, he’s Swanbu now.

Looking ready to hop towards the ducks had been a short feminine Lopvampa with short, choppy ocean blue hair that didn’t reach below the chin. Fin like light green ears, her eyes matched such almost exactly. Long blue wing on her left shoulder, on her shirt had been a blue bunny laughing with a bow tie. Text beneath it reading, Joker Bunny, the bun placed his finger on his chin. Niquel, excuse him, Jokebu was looking sharp today.

[They like me just fine! They’re just hungry!] The feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B speakers. He then drew a little waving smiley face on the screen. [Good morning, Swanbu, Jokebu.] But, such had been met with a groan.

“You can still call me Zhulong, you know,” Zhulong said sighing. “Please, don’t call me Swanbu unless we’re, you know, on the job.” Smile soon on his face, he extended his paw. “Morning almost birthday bun. You ready for tomorrow?”

“Yeah, just, call me Niquel like you always do,” Niquel said, sighing. “Forget that, though. Tomorrow’s the big day. You ready to become Farmbu?”

Paws shook, the bun locked eyes with his pals. Did these two not like their divine names? Maybe they didn’t. Was there something wrong with being called Joker Bunny? She gets to be a nighttime comedian! Isn’t that what job the Godbus assigned her? Ah, well, it wasn’t his business, best to not pry.

[Of course! It’s my destiny! I bet Divisee will plop the name on my lap!] A feminine voice read out through the Talkmaster B’s speakers asked.

But, such had been met with a momentary silence. Pals turning around for a moment, the bun blinked. Did he draw something down wrong? Maybe he did. Should he dial down a bit on the whole destiny thing? Maybe he should. Maybe he was getting a little bit ahead of himself there for a second.

[Did I say something wrong?] A feminine voice read out of the Talkmaster B’s speakers asked.

“No, you didn’t, it’s just,” Zhulong said, eyes closed. “Prepare yourself tomorrow. The worst might happen.”

Warning painting him a new shade of purple, the soon to be young adult’s heart leaped. Prepare for the worst tomorrow, why is that? He’s definitely going to be named Farmbu! Come on, now! Everything was lined up! For the past ninety five years of his life all he ever did was farm, farm, farm, his destiny was practically guaranteed at this point!

But, the warning buried itself deeper from within. What if the worst does happen? What if the godbuns don’t bestow upon him the name of Farmbu? What if they deem him Unhappy Bunny? Oh, no! If that happens can he kiss this farm goodbye? Slapping his cheeks, he threw down the rest of the wheat into the pond. No, no, there’s no way that’s going to happen, he’s being silly.

“Hey, don’t say that, you’re scaring him!” Niquel cried.

“I’m just saying, you never know,” Zhulong said, shrugging. “Forget that for now, though. Is the barn still festering with Chocobats?”

[You bet.] The robotic voice read out.

“Well, then, let’s help you get rid of them. You got a broom?” Knuckles were cracked.

[Yeah, mama has a whole shed of them, I think.] The robotic voice read out.

“Vermin, you’re going down!” Whoosh.

Hopping off towards the shed, the brooms practically fell out like a wrecking ball had come through. Tools almost burying him, the bun squeaked. Strix, he swears! He thought he told him to put the brooms on the wall! Ah, well, he’ll let this little transgression slide for today. Pushing the tsunami back, the party of three dashed into the barn.

Dark brown chocolate cup shaped bat creatures flapping everywhere around the barn, the farmer let out a little battle cry. Why were there so many Chocobats here today? He swears, they’ve been growing in numbers lately! How many did this make this week? One, two, fifty? Three hundred? He’d better check the tally he had been keeping. Ah, two hundred fifty, close enough.

Squeak, squeak, creatures multiplying in spades, the bun roared. Take this, and that, and this, bonk, bonk, bonk. Heads aplenty taking a beating, more soon came. Oh, no, there’s even more! What was attracting these things to the barn? He thought he cleaned this place up thoroughly last week!

“There’s way too many of them!” Niquel cried. “Did your older brother forget to clean the gutters again?”

“I bet,” Zhulong said. “That dude’s always stressed to the bone about everything.” Flapping up further, he turned towards Niquel. “Should I, you know?”

“Use your powers?” Niquel asked.

“Yeah?” Zhulong asked.

“You awakened yours already?” Niquel asked, eyebrow rose.

“Yeah?” Zhulong responded. “Can I go ahead? I won’t wreck the place.”

Nodding, the farmer kept going. Zhulong discovered his powers already, huh? He was always an early bloomer amongst his peers. Maybe he should have seen that coming. Gigantic golden coin summoned from above, pained squeaks overtook everything from window to door. Fiends melting into nothing, the bun did a double take. Woah, that was super cool!

“That should probably get rid of them for today, at least,” Zhulong said, huffing. “What’s next on the agenda?”

[I have to pick the rest of the ripe fruit.] The robotic voice read out.

“Ah, we’ll help you with that. Are the vegetables ready to pick also?” Zhulong asked.

[We’ll do that in the afternoon.] The robotic voice read out.

“Alright, let’s split up, then.” Flap, flap.

“I’ll go to the left and pick the spiky fruits,” Niquel said. Flap, flap.

Party of three splitting ways, the farmer flew off towards the center of the farm. Entire orchard in full bloom, the bun’s world lit up. Wow, today must be his lucky day! Was this the farm’s way of giving him an early birthday present? Amazing, he’d better get to picking. Basket nearly full as the evening was ready to roll in, he let out a little yawn. Divisee, if they’re watching up there, look well and good, because tomorrow, he’ll officially be Farmbu! Hehe.

Heading for the vegetable garden, yet another round of pests caught the soon to be young adult’s eyes. Bumpy, strawberry rats attempting to nibble on the cabbages, the broom was out and ready. More vermin in his territory yet again! He thought he asked Deigr to put down the fruit traps! But, nope, she forgot again. Classic Curious Hare.

Bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk, critters sent flying, the farmer sunk to his knees. Oh, no! The cabbages had bite marks in them! There’s no way his family can eat these now! He’d better toss them into the compost container. Crawling off towards the bush, he crumbled the leafy badness up. Another one bites the dust.

“You sure have a pest problem, huh?” Zhulong asked. “This is the tenth time this week we’ve had to chase out Strawrats from your vegetable garden.”

“Wasn’t your mother supposed to buy some fruit traps to chase them away?” Niquel asked, paws on her hips.

[I don’t know, she’s always working at the capitol, so I guess she forgot. Well, it’s fine, I’ll buy traps the day after tomorrow.] The robot voice read out.

“Nah, we’ll get them after we leave and bring them tomorrow,” Zhulong replied, arms crossed. Squeak, squeak. “Oh, great, there’s another one. Niquel, sock ’em!”

Remaining strawrats socked to oblivion, the cabbages had been plucked one after another. These ones were still good, right? Please, still be good! No bite marks anywhere, a sigh of relief flowed through him. Oh, thank the godbuns! Hopping towards the carrots, he studied them for a moment.

Not a single one ripe, the bun’s ears drooped. The carrots sure were taking a long time to grow. Maybe he should pray to Divisee. Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Clapping his palms together, he closed his eyes. O, great Divisee, please grant him a good carrot harvest. Everything else soon dropped in the basket, a long cleanup session took the stage.

Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring.

It’s the twentieth hour.

LopVampas who work the nightshifts, head to your stations.

“Well, it’s about time we head home,” Niquel said. “See you tomorrow. We’re going to make your cake, what flavor do you want?”

[Cherry carrot, if that’s not too much trouble!] The robotic voice cried out.

“No trouble, it’s not every day you turn one hundred,” Zhulong said. “Sure, we’ll make that for you. See ya.”

Waving farewell, the vampa dashed back into the abode. Leafy supper awaiting him, the bun chowed down. Man, this brussels sprout cheesy surprise was the best thing ever! Why can’t mama be home more often? She should stop working for the capitol so much. Cleaning his plate, he plopped down on the couch. Time to watch some cartoons!

Silly little animated show about magical vanilla kitties saving the world from sewer monsters, the farmer giggled. Man, this one never failed to be hilarious! Why did they stop airing it again? Oh, right, the director’s son got their divine name. Hmm, why would he stop animating because of that? That’s a bit strange. Twenty third hour kicking in, he yawned. Time for bed.

Rolling up underneath his covers, the second yawn of doom came from behind. Sharky pillow squeezed tight, he closed his eyes tight, shiny dream world ready to eat him alive. Thoughts from within looping on repeat, the world raced. Tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. Gosh, it’s finally tomorrow. Dozing off, the final thought kicked into place.

When he wakes up, he’ll finally be an adultbun!

Yay!

->

“I admit, I am a little nervous for today.

Well, no, scratch that,

I’m very nervous. What if the gods give me a terrible divine name? I feel

Like I’ve been hearing stuff

Like that happen lately on the news and stuff.

But, I just brush it off as the news reporters being silly.

Ehe, I’m certainly going to be called Farmbu, right? Like,

Come on! Look at me! I’m practically

Already a top tier farmer! Every day for the past ninety five years, I’ve practically worked to the bone here! After

Lessons, where would I go? The farm! I graduated twenty five years ago, of course,

Lopvampas leave school at around seventy five, so

Every single day since my graduation, I’ve

Devoted my entire days to

Farming! So, I’m going to be called Farmbu, right? Farmer Bunny? I

Am certain that the Divine Seed Bunny has this practically wrapped into their

Robe at this point!

Maybe I should put out some cabbages for them, too! I have this in the

Bag! I most certainly will be given the epithet Farmer!

Uuuh, oooh, I can feel it now! This is my

Rite of passage

In my life! Hehe, I’m

Going to go into the barn as soon as I wake up! I can feel it, this birthday is going to be amazing!

Hehe, Farmbu is such a good name for me! I can’t wait!

This will be the best divine naming ceremony ever! My

Rite of passage

Is almost here! I’m

Going to finally reach the century mark.

Hehe, adulbunhood, here I come! And,

This Farmbu will become the best farmer ever!

Probably. I don’t know, we’ll see. I feel

Like there’s always someone better!

Eh, anyway, I

Am so going to be called Farmbu, I have no

Shadow of doubt here! I am so ready for

Everything! This will be legendary!”

Pop.

Something popping as the bun woke up that morning, the sun was practically shining over Siorc’s head. It was finally the day! On this day, the twenty seventh day of the fourth month! As of this second, the seventh hour of the day, he is officially one hundred years old! The century club, an adultbun. Goodbye childhood, he is officially of age!

Ripping off the twenty six on the calendar, the bun hummed a little tune. Three hours to go until his ceremony! The mangoes were in the fridge, right? Oh, gosh! What if they weren’t any good? Will Divisee be upset? He’d better check them before heading to the barn! But, that can wait. Time to get ready for today!

Little bubble bath taking him away, the young adult kept humming. His first day in the adult world! In the next one hundred eighty minutes, his true name will make rounds across the village, Farmbu! Hehe, that name, it was making his cheeks get all sparkly! Hopping towards the mirror, the vampa danced.

Grey shirt with the text, Ready For Fun in all capital letters and a gleeful face on the chest area, the farmer slapped his cheeks. He’s ready. Knee length skirt fired up and ready to go, the green smiley face hairpins and earrings were clicked on. Oh, he’s so ready! Strutting towards the kitchen, the room lit up against the sunlight.

Pop.

Pop.

Pop!

“Happy birthday, Siorc!” the family cried in unison.

Talkmaster B out in front of him, the bun grinned ear to ear. Woah! Everyone was awake already? He can’t believe it! Turning the knobs, a dancing smile face had been drawn on the screen, but he shook the creature. Was that a little too enthusiastic? Maybe so. Try again, come on. More subdued face gracing the world, the voice released itself.

[Thank you! I’m officially an adultbun as of today!] A feminine voice read out through the Talkmaster B.

“I can’t believe it, Siorc’s one hundred years old!” Strix cried, paws on the side of his face. “Your divine name ceremony is in three hours. You ready?”

[Ready as I’ll ever be! In just three hours, I’ll finally be Farmbu officially!] A feminine voice read out through the Talkmaster B.

“Where do you want us to sit? Divisee probably wants to see you alone, but we’ll make sure to stay somewhere close,” Deigr said.

[Wait by the picnic tables! That’s the best seat in the farm after all!] The robotic voice exclaimed.

“Okay, you got it, birthday bun,” Deigr replied, thumb stuck up. “Anyway, it’s time for breakfast. We made your favorite!”

Cherry beef biscuits waiting for him, the bun tried to keep himself from salivating. Woah, they made these for him? Is he dreaming? Today was going to be the best day ever! Biting into the tarty goodness, tears streamed down his face. Gosh, when was the last time he got to eat one of these? Oh, his last birthday, right. He’s in heaven!

[These are the best!] A robotic voice exclaimed.

“Well, they came from the best, after all!” mama cried. “You’ve been managing the farm so well, honey!”

Cleaning up the table, the vampa curled up on the couch. Silly morning cartoons, the young adult giggled. Two hours until the ceremony! Can time move a little faster, pretty please? O, Divine Seed Bunny, please bring him to the tenth hour! But, he giggled such thoughts away. Haha, as if the divine could hear him in here.

Knock, knock.

Mama getting the door, his pals had soon arrived at the party. Everyone sure was coming early today! Maybe the divine name ceremony would be pushed up to the ninth hour, too? Nah, that’s probably not going to happen. Removing himself from the couch, his eyes wandered. Is that his cake? Gosh, can evening come, pretty please?

“Happy birthday, Siorc,” Zhulong said.

“Happy birthday, Siorc,” Niquel said. “Welcome to adultbunhood.”

[Thank you! I’m gonna be the best adultbun ever!] The robotic voice exclaimed.

“I’m sure you will be,” Zhulong replied, laughing. “Let’s go pick some mangoes.”

[Kay!] The robotic voice cried.

Juicy ripe mangoes picked one after another, the bun’s tailed swished from behind him. One hour left! He’d better prepare himself now. Dropping a bowl of mangoes in the hay bales, the young adult cleaned up the farm for the time being. It’s coming, it’s almost here. The time will soon be upon him.

Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick tock.

Twenty minutes to go, the young adult dropped everything. He should prepare himself a little early just in case! Sitting on top of the hay bales, the bun placed his hands into a praying position. Good morning, godbus, can they hear him? As of today, he’s an adultbun, god bless! Taking a deep breath, the bells were ready to ring.

Ring, ring, ring.

It’s the tenth hour.

It’s the tenth hour!

Work time, work time!

Bells ringing, the young adult brushed his legs against the hay bales. It’s time, it’s time! In less than sixty seconds, his divine name ceremony is about to begin! Any second now. Ten, nine, eight, seven. Oh, gosh, just counting is making his heart flutter! Six, five, four, three, two, one. Any second now, the light’s coming!

Blinding white light overtaking the barn, the bun placed his palm over his eyebrows. Gah, why is it so bright? That’s the descension of a deity, he guessed! Everything dissipating quicker than a blink, his boots kept popping upon the hay bale. He’s here, He’s here! Divisee has finally arrived!

Floating at the top of the barn had been a very powerful dark skinned divine rabbit person. Majestic dark silver hair pulled into two long, stringy twintails, his eyes had been the same shade as his locks. Star shaped pupils shining like the sun, he adorned a long white robe. Angelic wings behind them, the bun tried to hide a squee. There he is, Divisee! Bowing down, a goofy smile painted him a new shade of pink.

“Hmm, so this one’s today’s divine name ceremony, I see,” Divisee said in a booming tone. “Hello there, dear Lopvampa, One congratulates thee on reaching adulthood.”

[Thank you so much! I’m so ready for this! There’s mangoes over there, enjoy!] A robotic voice cried.

“Very well, one thanks thee for the offering,” Divisee responded, floating downward. Munch, munch, munch. “Quite impressive, these taste absolutely scrumptious.”

Godbun floating back upward, the vampa tried to keep himself down to earth. It’s time, it’s almost time! In a second, the spotlight will be over him, and he will be called Farmbu! Here it comes, three, two, one. Rainbow beam above him, the accidental squee let itself out. Oh, gosh, here it comes!

“I bestow upon thee--” Divisee called out, hands stretched out.

Here it comes!

Oh, gosh, here it comes.

He bestows upon thee, the epithet, Farmer Bunny, Farmbu for short!

"--The epithet, Unhappy Bunny, Unhapbu for short!” A cheeky smile appeared on his face.

Crack, crunch, click, kaboom.

Bonk.

Rolling off the hay bales, the rainbow faded. Hey, wait, hold on a second. This is a joke, right? It had to have been. That’s right, he’s pulling his leg! This is just a pre ceremony warmup! That’s right, of course. A joke, a jest, something funny before the real deal! Totally. Scribbling away, he let out a quiet laugh.

[You’re joking, right? Come on, give me my real divine name!] A robotic voice read out.

“Silly Lopvampa, that is your divine name,” Divisee said, smile on his face. ”From this day forward, this Lopvampa before me shall be known as Unhappy Bunny! Unhapbu for short!"

Crack.

Godbun laughing up a storm, the mirror shattered. No, what? Why? This is his divine name blessed by the godbuns? Why? His heart raced as the questions kept going. Please, this has to be some kind of prank! He was a farmer! Every single day of this life since he was five he would pick the fruits and veggies from the trees and garden! Very funny, Divisee, he’s laughing so hard right now.

[No! This can’t be! Please, can we do the ceremony again? I’m not unhappy!] A robotic voice cried.

“Sorry, the ceremony’s over!” Divisee said, smirking. “Congratulations, Unhapbu. And once again, welcome to adulthood. See you soon when it’s time for your job assignment, bye bye!”

Godbun floating away, the world shattered. Tears streaming down his face, he rolled up into a ball. Why? Why? Why did the gods do this to him? Is this a joke? Was he too hopeful? He could feel everything ready to rot from within. Crawling further inward into a pod, his head raced. Why? Why?

Why?! Why?! Why did the gods do this to him, why? What about him is unhappy? Why? Please, he wants a do over! There’s no way he’ll let this be his fate! World around him shattering into a million pieces, everything broke. Feeling everything grow dark, he closed his eyes, temporary dream world of rivers setting in.

He won’t accept this!

He absolutely won’t accept this fate!