Chapter 1
“There was nothing I could have done.”
“You could have said something about the fact that his fly was revealing more than he would have wanted to, I’m sure.”
“It’s only common sense.”
“You two speak words I do not comprehend. What is this ‘common sense’ you speak of?”
“Oh, shut the hell up, Mika.”
“Don’t get your panties in a bunch, Lover.”
“He’s not wearing anything to bunch, dumbass.”
“Aww, did you get jealous I called Alec ‘Lover’? I love you too, Luke.”
“Shut the hell up.” They said in unison.
“Temper, temper, boys. Give us a kiss.”
“You deserve to be out of the fun for being such an ass to us.”
“I have no idea how you can say that when I am the fun around here.”
“You prick,” Alec lights a joint.
“It’s what you like about me.”
“I don’t much care for the moron that’s attached to it.”
Luke takes a puff, “I don’t particularly like anything of you at all, except the fact that you’re funny. I like funny.”
“That’s all?” Mika grabs the joint. “I’m pretty sure it wasn’t just my comedy that brought about those naughty sounds from your mouth a little while ago.”
“We’re getting side-tracked.”
“We are on the rightest track. Now, come over here.”
“No, I told you. You were an ass.” Luke chugs the last of the empty bottle by the nightstand. He takes the last puff before the joint is done. “Oy, don’t leave me out of the fun.”
Mika broke the kiss. “I asked you, you were a dick.”
“He did.”
“Are you defending him, Alec?”
“The beauty of Truth is that it is a fact unaffected by the morality of right and wrong. It simply exist whether you like it or not.”
“I think you had a little too much to smoke, Mika. You’re starting to make sense.”
“Shh! Stop laughing so loud. I don’t want the neighbors calling my mom again.”
“Well, this idiot tickled me.” Luke wiped the tears away. “What did you expect?”
“Mika, he’s right. You know Luke is ticklish. Don’t go too far next time.”
“Sorry, Lukey. Here, let me kiss it better.”
“You didn’t tickle my ass cheek.”
“Oh, poppycock! I confused it with your face.”
“Shh!”
“I can’t be shushed, Luke! You’re pinching me. Stop!”
“I’m getting some more booze.” The joint was done. Alec got another one and a bottle of cheap whiskey. He took a chug as he went in the bedroom. “Seriously. You keep making the bed squeak that much, it’s bound to break. I won’t have another excuse to give my mom for a second broken bed.”
“Well, the last one we broke doing something much more fun than freaking wrestling. And I remember it being your enthusiastically hyper ass that caused that.”
Mika gasped in mock disbelief. “So cheeky, Luke. I love it.”
“If we break this bed, I swear I’ll tell my mom the truth.”
“Well, this is a wooden bed. Pretty sure it’s gonna last for a decade. And if this oaf gets off me, we can stop.”
“I don’t think I’m going anywhere,” he whispered into Mika’s ear.
A knowing silence draped over the room.
“Now you definitely need to move. I’m pretty sure we both need to readjust.”
“Actually, I think not. You look good like that.”
“Et tu, Alec?”
“Now I definitely need a coke.” Mika reaches for the cheap whiskey. “Ugh. Warm. How long ago did you get this out of the fridge?”
“It’s not like I make it a habit of timing us.”
“43 minutes and…12 seconds.”
“Really, Luke. You timed?
“I just happened to catch the time from the clock on the wall.”
“Get me a soda?”
“Sure,”
“Get some ice too?”
“Whatever you like, Lover.”
“Always so chipper when you’ve been the boss, huh, Lukey?”
“What can I say? It’s in my nature.”
“It’s in your nature to be a little bitch.”
“Did you say something, Mika?” Luke said from the other room.
“Nothi—”
“He said it’s your nature to be a little bitch.”
Mika gasped. “Traitor!”
Luke ran into the room and dived on to the bed.
Thunder shattered across the room and then silence.
“Did you just break the bed?”
“Did your big butt just break this week-old bed?”
“I plead the fifth.”
“The fifth won’t buy us a new bed.”
“Or stop my mom from killing me.”
“Well, you can actually tell the truth this time. Say I jumped and broke it.”
“Just skip the parts where we are high, naked, and sticky.”
“I—I can’t deal with this. I need a shower.”
“Me too.”
“Let’s be environmental and get one together.”
“If you break the shower, I will li-te-ra-lly murder you.”
“But then, who would do that thing you really like?”
“Not me,”
Alec groaned loudly. “Let’s just go.”
“Is anyone else hungry?”
