CHAPTER 1. DO YOU HAVE ANY FREE ROOMS?
Rustling, hairy bristles flounced giddily from side to side along the dusty, tiled floor. A small pile of muck had been gathering in the corner, and every few minutes, new clumps of bushy fluff would be added to its cottony mass.
A lively melody was scratchily blaring from a rounded, overhead speaker system. The kind you’d see in a rundown, post war prison. Harry skipped beneath the music’s’ source, tapping his feet gleefully like an excited child as he tunefully swept his way across the room. He reached a small, finely polished work counter, paused for a second to place his thin sweeping brush against its ebony surface and with a chipper, graceful hop, he pulled himself up and slid across. He landed on his feet and energetically threw his arms into the clammy air. He briskly rustled through a few papers and began to organize the sparkling wooden surface in front of him.
A delightful, old-timey bell jingled flatly as the door at the other end of the hotel foyer creaked open. A young, handsome face peeked out from behind the door’s masking appearance. The young man hesitantly whispered to Harry, who was stirring hastily behind the counter.
Hi, I’m looking for a room for the night. Are you open? I didn’t see a sign outside. Hello?
Harry didn’t respond. The strapping young fellow coyly pushed the door further and edged inside the stale reception. He noticed a large, wilted plant by the door. He’d never seen a flower quite like it before, it had a foreign, oriental appearance. The kind of entrancing fauna he’d come to adore when he’d studied in Japan. As he carefully paced toward Harry, the jubilant music from the belting loudspeaker quickly began to flood his ears from above. He’d never been a fan of umpa-umpa, freakishly upbeat songs of recent years. As he moved closer, he could also hear Harry, uncannily singing along in ecstatic unison with the bouncing melody.
Oh you, pretty Chitty Bang Bang. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. We love you!
Harry’s swift movements were clearer now and the young man almost choked on a sudden flood of outrageous laughter at the otherworldly sight before him. Harry was happily pattering his feet and clumsily rolling his shoulders in time with the tune. Harry suddenly halted his giddy prancing and quickly pivoted to face him. With a slight pinch of annoyance, the striking young fellow repeated his previous question.
Do you have any rooms, just for tonight? There was no sign outside so I wasn’t sure if you were even open.
Harry abruptly slammed his spindly hands down into the counter’s smooth surface and a warming, unforeseen smile began to flood across his wrinkled face. He replied in an excessively theatrical manner.
Oh, hello there’. I didn’t hear you come in. Of course, we only have the one room. My other guests have the rest booked up until May 14th. I’m Harrold, but you can call me Mr. Slater if you’d like fine sir!
The young man was uncertainly thrown off. This old guy, something didn’t sit quite right with him. His overt, prudent happiness, it wasn’t normal happiness. He did, however, urgently need a place to stay and all the other hotels were either closed or were charging an arm and a leg. Neither of which he had to spare. He gently rested his slender left elbow down on the edge of the desk and opened his mouth, but Harry interjected.
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, our four fendered Chitty Chitty friend! Oh, I do love Chitty Chitty. A truly wonderful composition! Will it be a single bed sir or do we have a flexible female companion joining us later?
The young man tilted his head somewhat in exasperated confusion at Harry’s odd interruption. Was this guy senile or was he just a bit nuts? Without giving Harry a chance to intersect further, he quickly replied.
Uh, just the single bed please Mr. Slater. My names’ Jordan Whiticar. Could I please have the key as soon as possible as I really want to get some rest?
Harry’s unusual leer grew broader. He unhurriedly wrote down Jordan’s details and drew a lint covered key from his left trouser pocket. His arm shot out like a bullet as he waved the key suggestively at the frustrated young fellow.
Here you go sir, one single room! Chitty Chitty really is a truly magical experience, isn’t it? The air, the atmosphere, its…
Jordan interrupted Harry’s animated rant. He clearly just wanted to get some sleep and indulging this crazy old fool’s outdated folly wasn’t an experience he cared to explore any further. He lightly seized the key from Harry’s lingering, shaking hand and spoke in a more gravely, exhausted voice.
Which room is it? No matter, it says on the key. 4. Alright, thanks for the room, and by the way, musicals, they’re not really my bag.
Jordan quickly hurried off through the swinging door to the left of the counter that lead to the four hotel rooms. Harry’s delighted grin quickly washed away, being promptly replaced with a disgusted, dissatisfied scowl. He followed Jordan’s movements through the wall, carefully scanning his green eyes across the divider behind him as though he could somehow see through it.
