Forbidden
In the middle of the year, was the first time I saw you. You were just a random person among the sea of students in the class. You were sitting at the back row with your hair tied in a ponytail, looking at the phone. At the time, you were just someone from the same class as I am, the same course as I am, taking the same subject as I am, along with over 40 people. You and I were no one to each other. You and I.
On that one particular day, would I thank God for happening. That day would end up being a memorable event and also being something that we wouldn’t even remember. You called out for me for the first time since our class started. Your deskmate was new and needed my help. Because of your deskmate would we even start talking. When class was over and we were waiting to go home, you started talking to me. And we already acted as if we were good friends for a long time. Even then, I wouldn't know that you’ll end up being someone dear to me. You and I.
From then, we started being friends;classmates who help out each other in class. Assisting in each other’s work sheets and assignments. We got closer then. You’d text me every now and then to tell me about all the things you were happy about, the things you were unhappy about and even about the things you were angry about. Of all people you’ve known way before me, you chose to tell me instead of them. I felt special from that. You and I.
Ever since that, I had these ‘things’ that I’ve been feeling, but I never gave two thoughts on it. But what I was so sure about was that I wanted to always be by your side. To be there whenever you were unhappy and to hug the unhappiness out of you just so I could see that smile plastered on your face again. To be there whenever you were angry and to be the person you’d vent those anger out just so I could hear the sweetness of your laugh. Being that person is what and who I wish to be for the longest of time. Just you and I.
Two years passed, and those ‘things’ I felt was stronger but I still would not care about it and would not go away. The relationship we have, it was shown towards the world in front of us. But, everyone would know us as the best of friends. Being the person each other would find, would talk to. Our very own partner’s in crime through thick and thin. Sadly, no one even you, would know about these ‘things’. But it’s us always us against the world for sure. You and I.
The mid-autumn festival that year, was the time that I felt and wanted to tell you all about those ‘things’ going inside me that I never could have told anyone. Through this festival, it bought two different people, living two different lives in two different worlds with only having one medium to connect the both of us; our university holding this festival. Our first festival we’re celebrating together but as we all know, just as friends. On that night with warm breezes flowing, no words of ‘that’ came out, but instead jokes and laughter along with our casual conversation were said. The words that I actually wanted to say were never relayed that day. And it never did as I never could do it and no other relationship was blossomed from us except for our friendship. Because, all I was sure of, was that those ‘things’ were nothing but my own forbidden love for you. Not yours, but mine. Not you, just me. Nothing but just forbidden love.
