Find Solace
The feeling of emptiness and the word “numb” comes to mind when she has tried to describe it, it always has been there after feelings of despair and depression, which come after the exclusiveness of happiness. After letting go you get silent tears; no one sees them; no one there to even try. It’s hard to determine what is fate and what is forced. As young as 16, she stood on the street as a prostitute, letting men of all ages, shapes, races, religions, and nationalities steal her for an hour or two. No one knew why that little girl was out there, when she got there, or even why she stayed. They didn’t even know her name, but after they take the frail girl into a motel, she never left with a pleased face, nor did she ever arrive with one.
In the cheap, dirty, run down city of Caracas, Venezuela, there are women of the same profession everywhere. There aren’t many places with good pay and hardly any with completely legal work. Staring down the roads all she saw were down run houses of various colors - blue, green, pink, orange, and the occasional once-was white that turned into an eggshell off-white. Each with sheets hung in windows, letting the people and animals hide from the overbearing sun; stains of rust and rain damage decorated the walls. The girl walked into a small shelter that would be considered hazardous; it was an ugly green color and had dirty floral print sheets that were hung and were currently blowing with the wind. A large man beside her mumbled in broken Spanish, trying to negotiate the price of the “entertainment” he would receive.
An hour later the young woman emerged from the run-down home with only seventy-five US dollars tucked safely away inside of her old and tattered bra. Her grimace was as clear as the sky, which was undeniably polluted. She kept her emotions close, almost under lock and key, but if you looked well enough, behind the malnourished yet large hipped body that most men only saw but women didn’t dare to look at, you would see a sliver of her pain. Her small form was hunched over, with a slight and barely noticeable tremble she had started her way back towards her living space. Unable to call it a house, as it was more like a storage room that was buried within the alleyways, not yet a home for it wasn’t a comfortable sanctuary that brought warmth or welcome, but simply the place in which she lived. She tried to blend into the shadows, her best attempt at avoiding confronting the men who took advantage of her.
By the luck of what she could only assume was some higher power that roamed the universe, she had made it safely into the room she was squatting in; she emptied her clothing of the money she had accumulated over the day. Dollar bills and coins ranging from foreign currency to local. She never knew how or why the alien people ventured into this dirty town of hers, but she never asked, her only job was to provide pleasure and she accepted that though she didn’t like it. If she had the money she would have moved into the large city nearby and enrolled herself into a school, the best school she could find for law, but it would be useless; she knew that although people seem to forget the reality of it all, that they weren’t all equal as they’d like to say they are. They have ranks and the multitude all know it but refuse to believe the fact that they were just put in it and are stuck there, most people don’t deserve theirs, whether it’s not good enough for them or they aren’t good enough for it. People have such a tendency to push others to be better, to go past their limits, but in the end those who try are never rewarded for their hard work.
Though she knew this, she still wondered if this would continue to be her life; until she imagined a fatal illness would come over her; this was very common to happen as they had hardly an ‘doctors’ (most were just thugs smuggling drugs in and out of the country, perhaps even creating their own to sell illegally), or to die at the hands of someone with a blood lust. Would she live a life of illegal activity just to get by or would she somehow find a way to flee the disgusting city? She believed she was naive for even having such thoughts as she had seen similar working women try to escape but but were dragged back to one of the rundown homes of a demanding customer who had taken a particular liking towards them, only for them to remain locked into the building, treated as a prisoner and barely kept alive. Things were tough for those like her, well for most people, really. All they did was fight - fight for freedom, money, jobs, health, and she couldn’t even say they fought for love. Everyone simply turned on everyone else - every man for themselves as they’d say.
No family could stay together long, not even by blood, mothers dumped their children off onto the streets if they were too hard to control or they didn’t have the money to provide for them. That was exactly what had happened to the teenage girl, she was once in a family of a mother and father but the father had cheated and left his wife with postpartum depression and a newborn baby to take care of; her illness meant the woman couldn’t work. She barely kept herself alive and neglected her child for years on end, until she finally snapped and spiraled into the hell of mental issues - a burden that no longer had a way out, abandoning the seven year old girl to roam the street in search of food and shelter. Begging for food and drink became a natural behavior for the kid but a place to stay wasn’t something she’d ever ask for, knowing the dangers even at such a young age; it was traumatizing. She saw and heard things no adolescence should have ever gone through. There was no one to trust.
The next day came early; she watched as the sun rose in the sky, ignoring the ratchet buildings blocking the beautiful sight. Her life was much like this sight, she was filled to the brim with beauty and had so much potential yet so many horrid things hid it all away, she was a specimen that was worthwhile worth helping and putting effort into - yet no one ever did. It was just like this place; it could be gorgeous if someone took the time to clean the streets, rebuild the structures and paint, add new furnishings, create better and more jobs. It could be wonderful but not a soul dared to. She stood up from her makeshift seat in the dead grass, making her way back onto the main road to catch some work. Later and into the evening she had fulfilled her duty and had made a total of five hundred dollars by bedding twenty men in the sixteen hours she was out working.
As she was traveling back, a rough and calloused hand had grabbed her thin arm. Yanked back into a fattened chest and beer belly, she tried to scream but her mouth was soon covered by the hand that wasn’t fastened to her frail body; tears streamed down her face as she made futile attempts to set herself free. The unknown figure wrestled her to the ground quite easily; there he began to tie the restless hands and pin her legs. Then he started to tear at the cloth surrounding her. Suddenly there was a bang, the silhouette of a small body was seen. The next thing shown was the gleam of a sharp silver knife.
As the moonlight was freed again she could see a ghost of the boy, so she cried and struggled, hoping he would come to her rescue, putting the blade to use. It seemed he did, as the youth walked closer. Then she could see the slight tremble, but the chubby man above her just beckoned the young man away, though he made no move to leave as he limped closer. As he was in reach, he swung his arm out, wounding the elder, causing him to let out a bellow. The Las twisted and turned in the man’s grasp, freeing her legs and kicking with all she had, letting him tumble off. The new figure had pushed himself forward and dug his metal clad arm into the man’s stomach; he fell and bled, unable to move from the sheer force that came from such a small but all the lethal body.
Sobs racked her body as the ordeal hit her with full force, the salty substance dripping into her open mouth, lips connected with trails of saliva. Wales were let out into the cold December air, the sound was covered by the bustling of the city in the night, drunken slurs seemed more audible in that moment. The new form had clenched his teeth as the waves of her voice had left a gutted feeling in the pit of his abdomen, as he stretched farther to reach the girl. Without a doubt the weeping yanked on emotions that had been buried deep within him, almost bringing tears to brim his own eyes. The feminine body trembled and shook, eyes red and hooded as she viewed the boy in front of her. Alas he crouched, pushing himself towards her as he grabbed at the material that held her hostage.
The lad untied the young woman’s arms and helped her stand, though he was barely able to do so himself as the previous scene had left his stomach restless. She stumbled and held herself up against the wall of one of the buildings in the alley. He dragged them both into another side of the city, where the windows were filled with similar sheets but the structures were made of old brick that faded due to the sun and had spray paint on sides of them. He pulled the girl into one of the worn rooms and laid her on the bed. She was weak from struggle and emotionally bruised as well, but thankful nevertheless. She splayed down and fell into a dreamless slumber.
He was a gentle but defensive soul who had a sense of justice but a wall guarded all emotions, leaving cold behavior to replace what was once warmth. Sitting in the worn and clawed chair in the corner of the room, facing the hole in the wall to view the night sky, he looked so small, much too small for a 14 year old boy. He was undoubtedly scrawny, obviously due to years of poor nutrition; he had a slim face and sunken-in eyes that were a deep shade of brown. If he were to be honest, he’d easily admit he had no idea what he was doing; he had run into this situation many times but never once had he helped, let alone stabbed a brute. It was a wonder he felt so compelled to help the obviously older girl whom he didn’t know but he had cared he limp body and taken her into is safe space. But what would he get in turn?
For some reason those thoughts felt nasty to him, to think that he desired a payment for helping her when he should’ve helped all of the others as well, it was only humane to be of guidance and help the people who needed it yet he was selfish. God knows what happened to the men and women he had left to fend of themselves against the prowlers of Caracas. Murder was common as well as rape, kidnappings, as well as numerous other activities that were against the will of their divinity. These had been foreign thoughts, never had he even dreamed of being empathetic towards others, he merely stuck to assuming they deserved it. Going over these revelations caused him to feel the need to better himself, to better others. But how could a little boy change a world that has been tormented and broke to the ground, the change relies in the people but the people are the ones who have destroyed everything and haven’t ever made the move to remedy it.
She wakes in wonder of where she is as the night before her mind was fogged and unable to understand the situation in which she was in. The dust flew around the room, her coughs sounding hoarse and dry. As she gazed around she found the boy huddled nearby, rising out of the bed, she held out her hand, waiting patiently for him to take it, she let out a smile smile. His shock overwhelmed him as he gripped her dainty hand in his equally small one, the slight tilt of her lips had warmed him, he was never once shown that in sincerity, most in a sinister and manipulative way. He stood up and innocently checked her for injuries, a way that was more unusual than common in her life, they both were awkward as they fidgeted, not knowing what to say or do to the other. Does she leave or stay; thank him or simply scamper away?
In this instance they met a reality that was less brutal than their own; there are good people, people who show kindness and ooze welcome. It was odd to come by when they have lived the lives they had, though life had its secrets as well. Unknown that her invitation wasn’t overstayed, perhaps unstayed even for the youth that desired a companion and someone to help take care of him, to teach him, she had slipped through the doorway after giving a nod of appreciation. She wandered a bit as it was unclear to her of where exactly she was, she ended up dragging her feet back to the small apartment complex, retracing her steps to find herself back in the room that she had woken in. Feebly she had asked for him to lead her back to her area, he gestured her to follow after him, but closely for safety.
