Coming Out (BTS/Taegi ff)

I woke up to the annoying and excessively loud noise of my alarm clock.

Fuck...

I hated mornings, and waking up, and...mornings. My name is Min Yoongi, but most people know me as Suga. I rap in underground clubs mostly. I’m also gay. Nobody knows that yet. I’m not sure how to tell them.

The thing is...I still live at home with my parents because, unfortunately, the starving artist thing, is really an actual thing. So mom and dad are letting me shack up in their basement while I look for jobs and try to figure out my life. It’s not that I think they would disown me for being gay...I just have no idea how to even be gay, much less tell anyone else that I am. I’m firmly entrenched in the closet.

I sighed and tousled my hair, trying desperately to summon any kind of motivation to job hunt today. I was naturally introverted and kind of shy...except for when I was on stage. I rocked that shit....I just wished I could be that confident, fiery, sex machine in the rest of my life. I would be fucking wading through a field of sausage if only I could.

I shuffled in and got in the shower, washing up and toweling off. I put on my standard ripped jeans and a hoodie, grabbing my converse and grudgingly sliding the damn things on. Converse...Converse...I really hate Converse, but they were the only thing I could afford right now, and they looked decent, I guess. I tried my hardest to sneak through the living room but was intercepted by my mom on the way to the door.

Damn it...

“Hey, hun! I made you eggs!” My mom said perkily. I died a little inside. I love my mom, but she is one of those morning people. I’ll never understand how we share DNA. I gave her a weak smile as I sat down, bent on devouring my eggs and getting the fuck out, before...

“You know Yoongi, you should really learn to cook. I mean, what are you doing with your life?” my mom said, toweling off her hands as she got ready to leave for work. I cringed inwardly and just kept shoving those goddamn eggs into my mouth. I nodded and tried not to engage in this conversation. “I got you cooking lessons. Now you can make me eggs!” She enthused, giving me a big smile and patting me on the back. I choked.

In no way did I want to learn to cook. I loved food, and being fed, and eating. Basically everything that is involved, but I tend to set things on fire, so...maybe kitchens aren’t my forte. I looked into my mom’s face and, alas, she had me. I couldn’t disappoint her. So I forced a watery smile and nodded agreement.

“Oh good!! Yoongi! You are going to have so much fun!!” she squealed. Clapping her hands like a child. It made me feel good to make her happy, but that was part of the problem. I am a total people pleaser. I can’t help it. I just want to make people happy. I was pulled out of my inner dialogue by my mom tapping my shoulder.

“Yoongi? Did you hear anything I just said?” she asked, raising a brow at me. I grinned sheepishly, knowing that would melt her. “Sorry mom, what were you saying?” I asked, trying desperately to appear to be interested. She just grinned at me.

“I was just saying that maybe you’ll meet a special someone there...women love a man who can cook. It’s sexy and modern” my mom said matter-of-factly. I just nodded, it was all I was capable of at this moment. “Ok, hun. I’m off! Have a good day! Remember! Cooking class is being held at the community center tonight at 6pm!” she said, blowing me a kiss over her shoulder as she left the house.

I finished my eggs and put my dishes in the washer, heading out to job hunt. I was putting in applications at a couple of places today, but I was going to interview with Jung Hoseok to work at his coffee shop later this afternoon. It was the most solid thing I had going. He seemed like a nice enough guy. He was hot too...I mentally rolled my eyes. I was not going to be that desperate gay who fell in love with a straight guy.

Fuck. No

I walked into Wholley Ground a few hours later and sniffed the air appreciatively. These places always smelled good. Contrary to popular belief, liking dick does not automatically equate to my knowing what the hell the good smell in the air was. I just knew I liked it.

I walked to the counter and smiled politely at the waitress, telling her that I was here for my interview with Mr. Jung. She smiled, eyes scanning me over. It was kind of uncomfortable. Girls did that though. I guess I’m attractive...I haven’t really given it much thought. I have more important things to do. Like sleeping. Also eating food that I did not cook.

I went over and sat at one of the tiny, ineffectual tables that are a staple in places like this, and waited for Mr. Jung. When he came out he smiled widely at me, showcasing his amazing cheek bones and perfect teeth. I swallowed hard and smiled at him, shaking his offered hand.

“You must be Min Yoongi? I’m Jung Hoseok, but you can just call me Hobie” he said, shaking my hand in an over-exuberant, extra way that made me cringe and laugh at the same time. “So what makes you want to work here, Yoongi? The pay is ok, the tips are good, but those aren’t usually things that guys like you are interested in” Hobie said, pretty eyes piercing my soul. I blushed and looked down at the floor and then back up at him, grinning awkwardly.

“This seems like a nice place to work, Hobie. Also, I just need some extra cash, to help supplement my income stream. I’m a rapper, mostly” I said shyly, smiling down at the floor. I looked up and Hobie was grinning, eyes twinkling. I melted. He was adorable. I couldn’t look away.

“I like you, Yoongi. When can you start?” Hobie asked, smiling his electrifying, sunny smile at me. Momentarily blinded, I took a moment to gather myself. “You do want the job...right?” Hobie said when I didn’t respond. I snapped out of it and nodded vigorously.

“Yes! Yes, of course! Thank you so much!” I said with real gratitude and excitement. Maybe Hobie was bi? I could swear I felt something when he shook my hand...

“Hey, Hobie!” I heard a pretty girl with sandy brown hair shout. The moment he looked at her I realized how completely desperate I was. He was totally in love with this girl. It was written all over his face. Why did I have to be so pathetic? I mentally bitch slapped myself and stood.

“I’ll be there in a second, Evie!” Hobie called, smiling at her in a way that I think would cause me to burst into flames, if directed at me. Hobie rounded on me and offered me his hand again. I took it and smiled, happy to finally have a job, anyway. I didn’t begrudge him his happiness...I just wished that I could find some for myself too, that’s all.

“Can you start on Monday?” Hobie asked. I nodded.

“See you monday, boss” I said, waving and walking out of the shop. I took out my phone and looked at the time, realizing with dread that it was time to head to the community center for the stupid class my mom had signed me up for. I sighed heavily and caught the bus across town. I briefly entertained the idea of just skipping it altogether, but swiftly remembered that my mom would probably want me to show her what I had learned. The only thing worse than continually lying to my mom, would be having to see the hurt look on her face if she found out.

I shuffled into the community center 30 minutes later feeling tired already. Something about boredom just seemed to sap my energy. If there was one thing I was positive I was good at, other than rapping, it was napping. I was an excellent napper, like, hard mode good. I put up my hoody and followed the signs for the cooking class, walking into a completely empty classroom. No teacher, no students, nothing. I walked back out and looked more closely at the signs.

Fuck me....

This class didn’t start for 45 minutes! My mom had gotten the time wrong. Oh well, I guess operation nappy time was in effect. I laid my head down on the desk and closed my eyes, hoping to have nice dreams of hot men in silk boxers.

I sat up quickly when I heard the teacher, Kim Seokjin, begin his lecture. The chemistry behind baking was kind of interesting, and he was hot, so it was easy to listen to him. He seemed to be paying alot of attention to a pretty brunette in the front row though. Maybe baking wasn’t the only chemistry happening in this class right now...

I smiled down at my desk, happy that at least someone was happy, and getting some. I felt something hit me in the arm and looked up into a pair of pretty dark brown eyes.

“Sorry...” the guy said, giving me a box smile that nearly made me pass out.

I blushed and picked up his eraser for him, wondering how it had ended up hitting me from the next row over. I blushed and smiled down, unable to look at him, handing it to him.

“I’m Taehyung” he said, flashing me a flirty grin.

Holy shit...

I smiled at him shyly, having a hard time coping with how hot he was. He was obviously gay. It radiated off of him in waves of fabulousness. He was everything a gay man should be. Stylish, sexy, confident...I sighed. I was the worst gay in existence.

I jumped slightly when Taehyung touched my arm gently.

“Hey...where’d you go?” He said with a chuckle. His voice was fucking perfect. It was like butterscotch and velvet. I just wanted to listen to him talk...or hear him speak lowly into my ear while he....I shivered at the thought, snapping out of it in time to grin at Taehyung.

“I’m Yoongi...it’s nice to meet you...” I murmured softly, drowning in his pretty dark eyes as they raked over my body, seeming to like something he saw.

“Yoongi...I like that” Taehyung said, biting his lip and checking me out. I blushed furiously and grinned down at my desk. “Lets talk later, Yoongi. I think I want to know you...” he purred. I almost fucking came in my pants.

The rest of the class I tried to pay attention, if only to keep from staring at Taehyung’s perfect profile and amazing, lean, muscular body. I kept feeling his gaze, and when I would look over, he would smirk at me or grin in a super flirty way, chuckling when I blushed and looked away. I think he enjoyed toying with me. Normally, that would bother me, but he was so hot...I was ok with being his toy.

When the class ended I glanced his way as he said something to the girl who the instructor clearly had a thing for. They must be friends, judging by the familiar way they interacted. Maybe she was his sister? Tae turned and grinned at me as he stalked over to where I was now standing, looking like a damn Gucci model on a runway.

“Hi” he said, smiling down at me and biting his damn lip again.

“Hi...” I murmured, licking my parched lips that always seemed to be slightly chapped, and looking down at the floor. I heard his breath catch slightly as I did that, not understanding what was happening until he lifted my chin and made me look up at him.

“You’re cute...” he said, leaning in and murmuring in my ear, ” I bet we could come up with all kinds of uses for that pretty mouth...” I shivered and locked gazes with him, not believing that this was even happening. Was I still sleeping at the desk? Had I just not woken up yet?

“Yoongi?” I heard an incredulous voice from behind me. I looked over and saw the son of one of my mother’s best friends walking toward me. I froze.

Shitshitshit....

I couldn’t let him see me with Taehyung. There was no way this could end well. I pulled away from Taehyung muttering some lame goodbye and walked quickly out of the classroom, waving hello to the guy who knew my mother. I had just enough time to register the confused look on Taehyung’s face...and maybe some hurt? That last part had to be my imagination. He barely knew me. Besides, that guy had player written all over him.

I headed home and threw myself into bed, falling asleep with visions of Taehyung’s mesmerizing eyes in my head, and his soft, velvety voice in my ears.