The Limit

Gray... the world is gray.

I scratched mindlessly at the dull metal desk I sat at, subconsciously committing the functions drawn on the board to memory. The teacher continued her lecture on tangent lines, desperately trying to prepare the class for the test that would be held this upcoming Thursday. As her voice slowly melted into a form of indistinct vowels, I flickered my eyes out of the classroom window, my mind’s eyes drawn to the only colored object that I could see.

The hummingbird chirped quietly as it gazed upon my still form, twitching its head sideways as I filed through a list of baseless facts about the creature. Its flight speed, the main source of food, basic body parts. All as equally irrelevant as they are useless. The bell echoed overhead as the class rose at once from their seats.

Startled by the sudden movement, the hummingbird zipped out of the open window, leaving me staring at its now empty spot on the sill. I rose as well, one hand reaching for my backpack and the other for the laptop on the desk.

“Remember to study, students. There are only two days left and this test will most definitely decide your future.”

I tucked the laptop into the smaller flap of my backpack, ignoring the shift of movement beside me.

“Hey, Vera, what’s up?”

“Is there something you need, Logan?” I zipped shut the flap and swung the backpack over my shoulders as I turned to face the boy.

“Look, I know you don’t do these kinds of things, but I need your help.”

“I refuse.” I shoved my way past the blonde, pushing in my desk chair as I went. He halted me with a strong grip on my arm.

“Please just hear me out, Vera. The test is in two days and I haven’t been studying. Just tutor me for a while, we both know you don’t need the extra time to prepare.”

I ripped my arm out of his grip, adjusting my footing before glancing at him out of the corner of my eyes.

“You brought this upon yourself, Logan. Don’t expect me to clean up your mess every single time, you have to learn to handle the consequences.” I passed him with one last condescending look before heading out the door. I whispered low under my breath, “I don’t want the blood of your death in my hands nor the burden on my shoulders.”

-

Slipping the key silently into the door, I pushed it open and stepped into the house. It was nearly dark now and Saf should be asleep. I dropped my bag onto the couch and trudged into the kitchen, relieved to find the empty bowl of curry in the sink, wiped clean of its contents. I picked up a piece of bread on the kitchen counter and made my way upstairs.

The instant I brushed Saf’s door with my fingers, his small snores could be heard through the crack. But Saf never snores. Sighing inwardly, I slipped into his room and sat at the edge of his bed, turning on the lamp that felt warm to the touch.

“Saf, I know you’re not asleep.”

After a moment, he sat up and turned to hug me around the waist. I adjusted my weight and brought him closer, his trembling form finally calming down.

“I’m scared, sis.” He admitted, his voice muffled slightly from the clothing. I released my hold and gazed gently into his eyes, the deepest brown I’ve ever seen and filled with so much intelligence. Much like my own and much like our mother’s.

“I know, but you’re going to do great. It’s only your first test.”

“But you don’t know that! You don’t know!” He blinked and squeezed out three fat tears. “What if I fail the test and disappear like Sara?” I suppressed a shudder at the name. “Then I won’t ever get to see you again and I don’t want that!”

“Hey hey, calm down Saf.” I gave a small reassuring smile, “Who’s the smartest person you know?”

“... me?” I laughed aloud.

“Besides you.” Saf grinned up at me.

“You.”

“Exactly, and I predict that you are going to pass that test with the highest score in history.”

With that same cheesy grin, Saf said, “Sis, the probability of me passing is already at 86% but that could change depending on a lot of things, environment and nerves for one.”

I scoffed sarcastically, “And who was it that taught you how to calculate that? By the way, it’s 85.74%.”

“Round up, sis.”

The two of us exchanged the same grin, silently laughing at our bickering.

“Can you sleep here with me tonight?” I was already making my way to the other side of the bed.

“Of course, Saf.” I tucked the covers over him and slipped onto the bed. His breathing evened out and only the soft wisps of exhaled air could be distinguished. “Anything for my brother.”

-

Saf’s tiny hand no longer trembled in my own as the two of us trekked down the caged path of the testing area. I gripped onto his hand tightly, mindlessly calling out questions and approving Saf’s continuous right answers.

“... what is a quadrilateral?”

“A four-sided closed shape.” He halted me with a tug on my hand. “Don’t worry, sis. I got this, I’ll see you after the test.” I smiled and bent down to embrace him.

“I know, Mrs. B will be picking you up so just wait at home until I get back, okay?”

“Yep, understood.”

I took his hand again and led him to the black-dressed security guard at the wire gate.

“Name please.” She asked, lightly tapping on some keys on the tablet in her hand.

“Saffire Le.” I grinned at the look on Saf’s face. “Oh don’t be like that, Saf, it’s a beautiful name.” He stuck his tongue out at me rebelliously.

“Okay, Saffire, follow the road into the building. Good luck.”

Hesitating only slightly, Saf released his hold on my hand and hiked up his backpack. Giving me a dignified two-finger salute, he disappeared out of my vision. I made my way back up the gravel path and slipped into the front seat of my car, igniting the engine and steering the vehicle towards my high school.

-

Kaden greeted me the moment I stepped out of my car, his ever-present phone in hand and backpack slung lazily over one shoulder. We’ve been both classmates and academic rivals since the first grade, alternating between first and second place throughout each year. Currently, the score lies at 235 to 234 in my favor.

“Mornin’ Vera.” He said without looking up, engrossed in something that flickered past on his phone screen. “You dropped off your brother today, right?”

“Yep and I see you are hacking the school system again.”

“Oh, you know me so well.” With a slight eye roll, I swung closed the car door and started in the direction of the school gate, Kaden listlessly following by my side. “You confident in this last test?”

“Of course.”

“Oh, and while we’re on the subject, let’s make this test worth 2 points to give each other an equal chance of winning.” I scoffed.

“Just admit it, Kaden, you lose to me in brain power.”

“No way, that one mistake you made on the last practice quiz would have cost you that point if you didn’t get extra credit.”

“Getting extra credit is also a skill, Kaden. You should learn it.” Kaden glared up at me from over his phone, grumbling something along the lines of stabbing me with a spoon. I wiped the grin from my face as the gate came into view, a row of black-clad guards could be seen rifling through backpacks and patting down students.

We got into a shorter line as a commotion started up between a guard and a student that was caught cheating. After a violent exchange of vile words, the student rammed his backpack into the guard’s head and dashed away from the gate. I stepped back as he flew by, watching as he glanced over his shoulder at the approaching group of security.

Sighing in exasperation, I turned around to glare irritatingly at the bleak school building. If one wants to cheat, they should at least do it well.

“Man, that was brutal. Kid didn’t even make it past the gate.”

“Stop staring Kaden, it would be wise to take this time and review those last few functions we were taught yesterday unless you want to lose to me again.”

“Che, stop bragging, Vera. It’s pissing me off.”

“Oh, but dear Kaden, bragging rights is only one of the many perks of winning,” I smirked as he glared half-heartedly.

I slipped my hands into my hoodie pockets as the line shortened enough for me to make out the hollow eye holes of the guard’s black masks. Suppressing a shudder at its emptiness, I placed my gaze on the gray concrete ground.

“Your bag.” I glanced up at the deep voice, altered mechanically to disguise the guard’s identity. I handed over my backpack as I observed his posture. The standard military clothing hid much but taut corded muscle could be made out through the dark fabric, flexing as the guard shifted through my bag. The perfect form of a trained killer.

“Clear. Raise your hands as I pat you down.” I obeyed mechanically as his gloved hands searched for potential weapons or any signs of cheating. Through the thin fabric of my hoodie, I could feel his strong grip on my sleeves and pant legs, willing myself not to flinch away from his touch.

Inaudible to everyone but him, I whispered dully, “Is it fun to kill?” His hands froze on my waist as I flickered my eyes to stare into the bottomless mask. “Do you enjoy killing?” After a moment of silence, I shook off his hands and stepped back. Then at a normal volume, “Am I cleared, sir?”

He nodded stiffly as I reached for my bag, slipping past the man and meeting Kaden on the other side of the gate.

“What took you so long.”

“A misunderstanding, nothing to worry about.” I grinned up at him. “Let’s go greet our death.”