Chapter 1: Solid emotions
My names Viti Alanza Smith and I’m currently arguing with My father
" Dad I couldn’t make it I said I was sorry okay stop making me feel worse” I screamed at him tears were rolling down my fragile skin
" YOU COULD HAVE MADE IT TO YOUR MOTHER’S FUNERAL” He roared
I took a step back I wasn’t ever afraid of my father because he’s never laid hands on me and I know he won’t now but he’s angry from grief and that can take a toll on everyone
“I had school I don’t have a car so I WALKED to HER GRAVE and I happened to be late you cannot blame me for this like everything else you bastard” I yelled and he threw all the plates on the ground just as I started walking away my sister Luna came into the room
" Where’s mama” She said and I took her to my room
" Listen baby girl mama is gone she passed away and you me and papa gotta be strong okay” I said tears finally stopping as I learn my mother is gone I feel so numb
” Okay but when will our new mommy come” She asked and I shrugged
" I hope she doesn’t come too soon” I said and she giggled I always want her to smile and laugh because I never want her to feel the pain that is burning deep inside my heart right now
" Baby girl lets go night night” I said and she nodded her head I took her to her room tucked her in and went to my room but my dad stopped me
"mi hija te amo y lo siento por como actué" My father said and I kissed his cheek
" No It's okay how do you feel dad" I asked and he sighed a great one
" Uh I know I'll never forget the pain in my heart" he said and I nodded
" what about you baby girl I know you can't keep it balled up" He said and I cracked a smile as a tear fell down again
" Uh my emotions are solid dad I don't think they will ever change because it hurts It really does tomorrow I will wake up and I won't hear he sweet melody playing through my ears as she takes me and Luna to school or when she bakes cake with us and I'll never forget when she gave me the talk all of the little moments will be gone dad and I'll never see her again" I said and wept on the floor crying and my dad sat next to me and rocked me to sleep
I feel lifeless.
I feel horrible.
And I feel so empty.
There's No emotions because I'm Solid.
