1. Left Behind
Lisa
I stood in front of my bedroom window, looking out at the dark night, hearing nothing but silence. Gone. My once happy fulfilled life was no more. It never crossed my mind that the dreadful day would fall on me. To anyone else sure, though I'd never wish it on anyone, not even my worst enemy.
My mind kept on going back and forth thinking what the hell happened, everything was perfect just two weeks ago. Letting out a pathetic sigh, I tried to pick myself up and make a plan, a viable plan for my future. Though it didn't take long before I failed miserably when I felt eerie sadness crawling back up to the surface.
My eyes were hot from crying too much. Tears traced down my cheeks and I kept wiping them away. Unable to bear the weight of my grief, I eventually dropped to the floor, my back to the wall as I hugged my knees and cried. God knows how many times already that day.
It had been a week since my parents' funeral. It hurts to remember that I wouldn't get to see them again. There would be no more family dinners, no more lively discussion about our days. No more seeing the adoration in mom's face every time she sees dad and vice versa. I wouldn't be able to confide in them any longer. Not ever.
Still crying, I made up my mind and got myself up from the floor. I didn't know how many times already, but I repeated the words in my head. Again.
I can do this.
I can survive this.
I will survive this.
I was determined to not let the tragic death of my parents drown me in eternal sorrows. Walking out of my room, I headed towards the living room then smiled at Barney. At least I still have him. He would always listen to me when others wouldn't.
As the night became late, I was still pondering in my one bedroom apartment. Wondering what I should do first tomorrow. To think it was all so easy when I was younger. As I grew older, there were so many things that I needed to consider. I was still reluctant to go anywhere, especially after dark. The cold feeling of someone watching still latched every now and then. Even when I felt safe, I still didn't like going out alone at night.
Having the ability to see the dead was not all the hoorah as people might think. For those who didn't have it, they wish they did. And for those who did, they would either accept it or try to deny it. For me it was the latter.
I would preferably go where I would know the history of the place. I needed to know what I would be up against to better prepare myself with. Sometimes, the dead would just pop up out of nowhere. I might see a glimpse of dusty shadows or hear the sound of a woman crying. Every now and then, I'd see a face appearing out of nowhere, some might look sad and some might seem angry. I knew they wanted to communicate. Sometimes, they just wanted to convey their message to their loved ones. But being a medium was not for me, I didn't want to facilitate communication between the living and the dead.
I never wanted this.
I missed my parents, life was so easy with them guiding me. To think I was so annoyed back then when they would tell me when and where not to go. After their accident, I realized that I needed them the most. Alone in this world was not how I imagined my life to be. At least not so soon.
When mom and dad's lawyer contacted me in the morning and delivered the news, I was beyond shocked. While still feeling sad and confused, I agreed to come to his office to complete all the necessary legal administrations.
His office was one of those prestigious law firms located at the center of the town's business district. After confirming my appointment, the nice woman at the front desk ushered me through rows of cubicles until we reached a corner office where I was introduced to his personal assistant. She too was nice, she smiled and knocked on his door to announce my arrival.
As soon as I was let into the lawyer's office he warmly welcomed me and gave me his card. "Aiden Monroe" was the name that was elegantly printed on the business card along with his contact details.
The charming man was probably in his mid thirties. He looked stunning, a typical well paid lawyer with glasses, tailored suits, and an expensive looking pair of leather shoes. I was sure the ladies would glance when he passed by, looking tall and confident. While I never considered myself attractive, usually men wouldn't bother glancing at my way at bars or parties due to my close off expression, especially when I was not confident with my surroundings.
I took my attention back to him when he looked straight at me and shook my hand confidently before directing me to sit on the chair in front of his desk.
"Look Ms. Marsden..." he opened our conversation as he took his seat across from me.
"Lisa. Call me Lisa. I'm sure we can lose the formality now that you know more about my family than anyone else." I responded to Aiden Monroe. I didn't know why, but at that point I had enough of everyone calling me Ms. Marsden since it reminded me of my parents and the grief was still too much.
"Well then, you can call me Aiden." He replied with a smile, a very business-like polite smile.
I couldn't seem to look away from his smile. It looked so genuine, like he really cared about all his clients. Maybe it was the glasses. I had never considered men with glasses attractive. Maybe it came down to their professions like doctors, lawyers, or accountants. I was more drawn to men with more outdoorsy professions. Like athletes, I dated a basketball player once, and my longest relationship was with a golfer. But never with someone who worked behind the desk. After a surprisingly wandering mind, I abruptly focused back on the matters presented by my parents’ lawyer.
"Look Lisa... I know it's a lot to process right now, but I want you to know that your parents loved you very much, and they wanted you to have a settled future in the event of their death." Aiden explained as he got up from the chair behind his large sophisticated and sleek wooden desk. Even his office furniture matched his stunning handsome appearance.
With just a few steps he moved the vacant leather chair next to mine and faced me. Aiden sat casually on the chair next to mine when he looked into my eyes as if he could read into my darkest thoughts.
I guess it comes with the profession. He dealt with other people's legal affairs in their moment of grief just like mine. Staring back into his calming eyes, feeling like he'd have my best interest, the back of my eyes suddenly felt hot. I tried to contain my grief, but it still hurt. It stings when it comes up when you least expect it.
"You will be alright, Lisa. I'm sure your parents would like you to be strong. I met them and they spoke very highly of you. They told me that you're their only child, and they wanted you to be able to stand on your own should anything happen to them. Hence, the will they composed with me in this office a couple of months ago." Aiden said with comfort and calmness that made me hang on to every word he said. Every word that my parents said to him.
"You might not know, but your parents had made very good investments in the past. You should be able to live comfortably from now on, though from seeing your emotional condition I know you would rather have them back instead." Aiden briefly rested his big hand on mine for assurance. I was surprised by the loss of his touch as soon as it was gone. But I shook the feeling off, not wanting to have improper attachment towards the handsome lawyer. Surely he has someone waiting at home for him.
After signing all the necessary documents, I was ready to leave the office. "Lisa, you have my number. You can call me if you need further assistance. It's the least I could do. Your parents helped me in the past." His cryptic words should have intrigued my mind, but I only felt the numbness of sadness swirling under my chest.
He paused as we reached his office door. His warm hand very briefly touched my back as if he wanted to give me strength, subtly telling me that I can trust him. The niggling feeling did evoke something inside me, but it was quickly drowned by the realization that my parents came to him months ago. They must've sensed something was going to happen to them.
"Just call me, okay? It'll ease my mind." Aiden said abruptly, upon me leaving his office.
His words made me wonder how a person like Aiden was helped by my parents. But instead of asking him I shook his hand, nodded, and said goodbye to him. It all still felt so surreal to me.
Walking out of his office, I wondered how my parents had kept all their wealth from me. Not that we were lacking, but I did sign a lot of zeros that were passed from my parents.
Letting out a big sigh of relief, I leaned back and got settled into my car. I rested my bag and all copies of legal documents on the passenger side. I took a deep breath, grabbed the steering wheel, turned on the car and drove off to my childhood home.
Once again in my own mind.
Feeling left behind.
