You

I have been looking at you from a far, silently observing. It was unintentional, maybe a little curious. It should have been a one time thing, to kill time. But, a minute turned to hours, days, weeks and over time, months.

I even find myself looking over the sea of crowds, just to be sure if I could have another day of you. Your awkward laughs, lame jokes, lazy voice-- I'm getting addicted.

Each day, the urge of wanting to approach you gets to be more and more bothersome. It's kind of itchy and annoying. I have been even planning, imagining it over and over inside my head. Scenes after scenes. It makes me start to feel anxious and crazy.

I'm getting more attached, more involved, more curious. Each day became a battle. Its getting harder to get rid of you slowly eating my brain. Guess, zombie do exists.

I mushed my face and secretly stared you between my fingers. You're way too engrossed talking some computer games, parties or maybe alcohol to catch me looking.

Maybe the reason why its too hard to talk to you. You are interested on things l'm not. And maybe, building courage isn't enough.

I frowned and closed the gap between my fingers. I swam deep, way more deeper on my thoughts. Thinking you, only you.

Then absentmindedly, I reached my pen and drew a heart. It was small, smaller than those printed letters on my book. Not anyone could notice, not even you.

I slowly filled the shape and stared it after. Much longer than I drew it, the heart, the heart that signifies love.

Love.

The word flew electrically through my veins. The more I stare it, the more it made me shiver and nervous.

I nibbled my pen and stared you wide eye after. It was comically how slowly it sunk in, how my curiosity evolved.

Love is way stronger to define you. Maybe, infatuation, admiration.

And maybe, I should n't let it grew more. Maybe, I should n't let myself think you more. I could have save me now before I could fall more and more.

But maybe, today is an exemption. Today, I will drink a bit more of you. Tomorrow, tomorrow I will stop.

"I'm gonna melt."

My ears sure will fall after hearing those words directed towards me. I hardly digest what the words were and only replied a minute later.

"What?"

You fondly grin, dimples slowly creeping.

"You've been staring me for a while, I'm gonna melt."

My heart begun to speed up, palms started to sweat. But I have to act calm and unaffected. I have no intention of getting caught. Not yet, not today.

Tomorrow, tomorrow I will stop.

A phrase I have been keeping inside my head a few weeks ago.

And tomorrow is another today. Just like those tomorrows swiftly turned into todays to yesterdays.

"I am thinking."

I awkwardly excused, trying hard to sound annoyed. Silently hoping, I did not cracked or turned red. That will be more suspicious and obvious to anyone who may have heard.

"Sure you are." You flashed devilish grin and teasingly added, "I mean, it's called 'thinking' nowadays."

I frowned and attempted to divert the topic somewhere else. "Why are you even sit next to me?"

"Don't you want to sit next to me?"

The smug look on your face wanted me to choke you from where you sat.

It was bulls eye. You have no idea how badly I wanted to.

"I don't."

I quickly growled but you faked cry and acted hurt. You even begun story telling nonsense things, trying hard to be in those movie dramas.

"Way enough to make it to Oscars." I cut off before you could say something that will put me on a tight spot.

I wanted to make another come back but, I realized something new. Today is new. We are talking.

You and I.

You were pouting while I'm giving you an amused looks. Maybe, god pitied me and fulfilled my desires. Or maybe, this is a dream, one of those hundreds I kept dreaming.

But the weight on my shoulders and warm breath fanned my ears told otherwise. You snaked your arm around me and whispered,

"I think, it is impossible for me to make it to Oscars. I'm lacked of skills in acting and pretending, unlike you."

You should have kept your mouth to yourself. You should have quit your habit minding everyone's businesses.

Lying is a sin and so does giving hopes to someone who may is in love. It may overthink the person.

And that's quite a problem. I am that person, I overthink things. Which why I was curious and later became interested in you.

However, I am getting a weird feeling you were quite enjoying your teases and the way I am slowly falling to your traps. I'm half believing you knew even if I did not tell you.

So I glared and responded, "If I accidentally choke you, I'm pointing finger at you."

Then, you bursted a laugh which echoed throughout the classroom, causing everybody to glance our way.

I turned red.