Passionly

I was sitting in the middle of history class with my least favorite teacher in the entire highschool; Mrs. Gilldebrandt. I mean she was a good teacher overall...but her husband and my mom had been caught making out in the parking lot on the night of the Winter Dance. It was a couple months ago, and of course I didn’t find out about it until Mr. Gildebrandt ended up on my moms couch the next day. I was shocked but my expectations of dances were quite low, there wasn’t much I expected not to happen at one. My last dance was 8th grade year on Halloween night. I was dressed as a vampire, and that devil Amelia had been an angel. I was dancing and losing myself to the music when I saw a guy smiling at me, I started dancing in his direction until I bumped into Amelia, causing her red punch to spill all over her white dress. The dramatic queen that she is, she started screaming, and of course her friends ran over laughing at me and saying things like, “vampire got hungry,” “what a freak,” “she's always been weird, never thought it would get this bad.” Until the smiling boy grabbed my hand and pulled me away, he tried making me feel better by buying me a shake(which is why we go get shakes every Friday night) and then he took me home. I was humiliated and I swore off all future dances; but that was also when our friendship began. So even though her son and I were now nearly inseparable after two years of friendship, I was definitely Mrs. Gildebrandts least favorite student. Which made it awkward when Liam came over to my house.. But to top it off, his dad would always try to change my moms rules, and act like my parent, causing my mom and I to fight about him a lot. She did everything in her power to support me, but when it came to that man, she was an utter mess. Which is why he is still living at my house, not cleaning up after himself, nor paying rent. Liam walked into class bringing me back to reality. He pulled up a chair beside me, and ignored his mother incredulously while she eyed him and I. They got in a fight about me a couple nights ago, and she hasn’t said a word to me ever since. I looked over at his bag, as he pulled out his huge camera. My heart raced a little bit with anticipation for what I was about to see. He wrapped his arm around my chair, and smiled lopsidedly saying, “You have to look at these El.” I rolled my eyes and said, “Show me what you think you got.” I bit my lip as he began scrolling through the pictures of street art, lonely alleys, and anything else that caught his eye. He has always had a thing for capturing special moments. Just then his mother called him over to her desk, he sighed and gave me a painful smile saying, “I’ll be right back.” I shrugged, and picked his camera up to continue scrolling through the rest of his shots. They were beautiful. As I got to the last of the photos, my face heated and my breathing quickened.. These photos.. They were of me. ME. I saw myself in the grocery store, at school, taking the uber, all instances where I had no idea he was with me.. This was so creepy. Just then my name was called over the intercom, “Michelle Hamilton, please report to the office.” I looked at Liam, my heart skipping a beat because of what I just saw. He was still talking to his mom, Walking past him and his mother, on my way to the door, He stood and said, “I’m going with El to the office.” I looked at him, and realized I didn’t want to be around him at the moment, so I said, “it’s no big deal, I can go alone,” And before he could say anything I walked out of the classroom. The door was open, and she was saying something to Liam that I didn't even care to listen to. So I walked the halls to the office alone trying to process what I just saw. Why did he take those photos? Maybe he just saw me, and there was a reasonable explanation behind them… But what? Why would my bestfriend have photos of me in complete random places… Suddenly I found myself standing in the office in front of the head desk, and I was directed into a conference room, a police officer stood waiting. My heart began to race, my face heated, and my hands shook.. Liam walked up and grabbed my right hand, causing it to stop shaking, and I clenched my left hand, causing it to stop shaking as well. What the actual hell, I tried to pull my hand from Liam's, and he held tighter, and through clenched teeth, he said, “I can explain.” Just then I remembered I left the camera on a shot of me.. of course he put it together.. So we walked into the room, and immediately the cop asked, “Are you Michelle Hamilton?” Not being able to speak, I slowly nodded my head up and down, eyeing him hesitantly. That was the first time I had ever been addressed by a police officer, I hoped Gabby didn’t snitch me out for trying pot brownies a couple weeks ago. I always knew she was a snitch.. The unnamed cop asked me to sit down, and I responded with calmly taking a seat in one of the old chairs around the conference table. He didn’t even acknowledge Liam pushing away the squeaky chair, and pulling up a quieter one. When Liam took a seat the cop finally sat down and sighed, only making the slightest of eye contact with me, his face looking glum. He seemed out of place, and hesitant, which made me even more uneasy, Not being able to handle the silence anymore I finally spoke up, “What’s going on?” He didn’t make eye contact this time and instead watched the clock on the far wall.. It seemed like forever when he finally said it. The words that altered my entire future. “Your mother was in a car wreck this morning, an intoxicated driver sped through a red light and hit her..” I began to shake a little, finding only the words, “she’s okay right?” He looked away, and ran his hand through his hair.. he spoke up in a low voice, “I’m sorry Michelle, your mother didn’t survive.” My heart broke, I couldn’t speak, I couldn’t move. I forgot Liam was there, he reached over and pulled me too him. I sat there a second letting the thoughts settle, and then I let Liam pull me too him until I was sitting on his lap, The new swelling anger, confusion, hurt, and shock surfaced into an ugly sob into Liam’s neck. The cop asked if I had any other relatives, and Liam answered for me, “her dad lives in Montana. His name is Sean Hamilton.” The cop nodded and left the room. Liam didn’t speak, he just held me and rubbed my back. How did Liam know about my dad? I cried and cried, trying to make sense of it all in my mind. My mother didn’t deserve this. She was only 37 and was in the prime time of her career. This is bullshit. This is bullshit. This is BULLSHIT. The cop came back about 30 minutes later and said, “I just spoke to your father, he’s transferring money to us now to buy an airplane ticket, you’ll be leaving on the first flight. It’s time to go pack your things.” I pulled away from Liam, not even looking at him, I walked out. The cop following closely behind me as he showed me to his car. My mom won’t be home when I get there… She’s just gone.. The only family I have.. On the ride home, it was quiet and awkward. My head buzzing with thoughts, finally I blocked it all out and focused on getting home. When we got there, the cop said, “Jason Gildebrandt is in court today with his wife and we asked him to come grab his things later tonight… I will be here at 8am in the morning to pick you up.” I nodded my head, and got out of the car as fast as I could, making my way into the building, and taking the elevator to the 6th floor. I opened the door and just when I cleared my head and felt like I had no more tears, they came rushing down my face, and I knew that I would never be the same. I walked straight into my moms room, and found Mango crawled up at the end of her bed. He was a white and black tabby cat. I laid down beside him and I let the tears stream down again. When I finally found the strength to start packing, I got up and pulled out 5 large suitcases from under my moms bed. Mango stared at me for a little while before he fell asleep again. First I packed my mom's belongings, her makeup, perfumes, clothes, decorations.. Then I packed everything that I thought I’d need from my room, bathroom, and kitchen. By the time I was finished it was around 11:30 pm, I had almost the whole house packed, except for the furniture and beds of course. I don’t know how I did all of that alone, granted my mom and I didn’t have very much stuff, especially since it all fit into 5 suitcases… I sighed and leaned back, finding Just then the door opened, and I looked up to find an angry Mr. Gildebrandt and a glum looking son. I figured Mr. Gildebrandt was upset about all of his things on the front porch. I sighed and stood up, I walked over to the door, instantly smelling beer and cheap cologne. I stared into Gildebrandt’s eyes not being able to look at Liam, I stood straighter and said, “Leave. Now.” They looked at me as if seeing a broken little kid, and Gildebrandt tried to hug me. I backed up from him instinctively and slammed the door in both of their faces. I could hear Liam arguing with his dad, but I didn’t care. I locked the door, and walked into my moms room, finding Mango in the same place I left him, I curled up next to him and let my thoughts take over. Just this morning I was with her…. She wasn’t the best mother, but she took care of me and was there when I needed her the most, which only led to more tears, and a sleepless night.