Dates

Today, as I was scrolling Facebook for the first time in 3 months, I realized I had about a million messages from a girl I haven’t spoken to in at least 4 years. Marisa Gonzalez. A horny little bitch I’ve known since like 6th grade.

Marisa: Cut the shit ik you’re lonely!

Me: No thank u.

Marisa: I swear he’s a good looking guy

Me: Don’t care.

Marisa: Think of it as a fun night out

Me: No Marisa, I do not need a relationship to feel fulfilled in life

Marisa: Yes you fucking do. Stop, let me do this for you! It’s just a blind date.

Me: Don’t you have other friends?!

Marisa: Yeah, but they’re happily in relationships or happily partying. You are just a sad case :(

Me: I’m still young, I don’t need this right now

Marisa: Then who will you take to prom??? Your cousin???? Don’t be that person

Me: FINE!!! But it’s not going to be a dinner date. Make it Saturday at 3 p.m. @ the cafe

Marisa: You’re welcome! Trust me ;)

Me: Bye :/

I literally haven’t spoken to this girl in years. Maybe the occasional liking each other’s posts on Instagram and seeing each other around the neighborhood, but to classify: WE DON’T TALK. And now she’s trying to hook me up with some random man-boy she’s probably already rejected herself. Fuck and that’s tomorrow.

I think I’m gonna be sick.